Lessons Only Tasuki can Teach
by IttyBittyTidbits
Summary: Anyone who's been in the book world can say that it's not a dream vacation. But when Lolita chooses to stay for Chichiri, trouble begins. Because though monks cannot harbour romantic feelings, bandits can.
1. Chapter 1

Lessons Only Tasuki Can Teach

Chapter one: Sake can make heartaches go away

***

Three months.

What was the point of all that again? Pining away after a man who couldn't love her back?

Girls, as far as he was concerned, were stupid. But Tasuki couldn't quite unwrap his mind from the solitary figure in the gazebo. For the longest time, she just sat there, legs dangling through the slats of the railings and over the water. He thanked the railings for being present; otherwise, by the look on her face, he would have been convinced she would just up and plunge into the water to die.

He didn't know who to be frustrated at: Chichiri, for being so unfeeling, or this girl, for being so persistent. In the end, though, it was obvious who the biggest loser was.

Well then. Should he go and comfort her? No one has ever been able to get through that thick skull of hers ever since Chichiri told her he wasn't the type who could love anyone back. Hmph. Mighty civil of him to say so. Sadly, the idiot girl saw only the rejection. Thus, she moped. And moped. And moped. For a week now, that was her chief pastime.

And that was the last straw. He couldn't – wouldn't – stand watching her cry her eyes out anymore. Woman-hater though he was, Tasuki was still human, and thinking of letting her starve herself to death before his very eyes gripped his conscience.

So, softening his face as best he could, Tasuki strode right up the bridge to the gazebo, determined to pull her out of her misery or die trying.

"Hey."

Except for the tears sliding down her face, she didn't even move.

"What kind of loser are you to cry over a lover-monk for a whole week, anyway?" He kicked himself internally as soon as those words popped out. Great going, Tasuki. Just great.

"You don't know half of it."

Well at least it got her to hiccup/croak/talk. Tasuki had to shake his head at the miserable state her voice had become after seven days of bawling. "Do you...want to talk about it?" he cautiously asked, suddenly remembering the last time he listened to a woman's break-up story. She shrugged, so he sat down beside her.

"It's just like Chiri to say what he did to you," he said, watching his words carefully. "But it doesn't mean he hates you or anything..."

"But he said he can't love."

"Yeah...the guy's a monk fer cryin' out loud. They got all those celibacy-chastity vows an' all!"

"I came all the way here for nothing." Her forehead found the wood of the railing, and for a minute Tasuki thought she was going to start banging her head against it. He had heard this story before – the first time she arrived, in fact. _Toss a coin into a wishing well and make your wish. She did that to the syllable. And when she opened her eyes, poof! Voila Konan. _It was the truth – or so the girl claimed. He didn't really want to believe it, but with the crazy number of random strangers popping in and out of this side of the universe, he knew he had to.

"At least y' got yer wish," he consoled dryly.

"Look how it turned out."

"Lo, there're so many other fish in the sea..." A fresh slew of tears greeted his words that Tasuki had to scramble, "No pun intended."

"But there's only one Chichiri," she wailed.

"Ya don't have to have th' one an' only Chichiri ta' be happy! I'm sure there are other men out there who are just waiting for you to –" he tried not to choke at his next words, "– love them. Like the men in yer world. Y' must be pretty popular there!"

"You want me to go back?" Lolita turned away from the banister to tearfully look him in the eye. "You don't want me here either, Tasuki?"

Oh, god. He wanted to roll his eyes then, but stopped himself at the realization that it was hardly the ideal response. "`Course not! It's fun havin' you 'ere in Konan...`cept, since ya don't look too happy 'bout it, I thought...just maybe...you'd rather go back home."

"I want to stay."

Nice and stout answer. He grinned, standing and holding out a hand. "Then y' might as well be acquainted with all the good things 'bout bein' `ere. Ya can't spend forever moanin' 'bout Chiri's lack of a love life!"

At the mention of Chichiri, Lolita turned to her refuge again, the crying fit commencing once more. Tasuki began to wonder why he was so good-hearted.

"I know what can make you feel better."

"Chichiri?"

"Naw." Seriously. It was unhealthy for the girl to just think of that monk all day, everyday. "Somethin' even better."

"There's something better than Chichiri?"

"Sure, there is!"

For a minute while she narrowed her eyes, the tears stopped. "You're not trying to get me high, are you?"

"No way!"

"What's this mystery thing?"

"I'll show you." Reluctantly, she took his outstretched hand. Grinning mile-wide at his victory, Tasuki dragged her down the bridges back into the palace complex. "But get yerself cleaned up first."

***

"_That_ is supposed to be better than _Chichiri_?"

She should have known. Leave it to Tasuki to think sake better than anything else under the glowing red sun. He was planning to get her drunk to forget about Chichiri, but she knew better. The bliss of ignorance would last only the night, at best, returning as a massive hangover in the morning to add to the misery of a broken heart.

"No, thank you, Tasuki," Lolita said, scraping her chair back, ready to leave the tavern he had dragged her into. "I'll handle this my way."

"An' cry fer another week?' he spat sarcastically, holding her back with one hand and pouring sake with the other. "I won't stand watchin' ya drift 'round like a ghost anymore." In one strong tug, he had her sitting her back down. Lolita wrinkled her nose at the acrid scent of alcohol as he nudged the cup towards her.

"I really shouldn't..."

"Try it."

Casting a long sideways look at him, she hesitantly wrapped her hands around the cup and stared at the clear liquid. Could it really be the "magical" fluid Tasuki swore by? It looked just like water. Maybe he was playing with her...placebo effect and all. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw him chug sake right out of the bottle, and then wipe his mouth on his sleeve, completely unfazed. Yep. Tasuki was just fooling around. He wouldn't really get her drunk, the sweetheart...

Raising the cup, Lolita nonchalantly took a long swig...and nearly spat it out.

"Ab...solute...poison," she coughed, throat burning from the alcohol content. Her mind fuzzed for a minute, which was a good thing because her sinuses were seriously beginning to kill her.

The bandit only laughed, pouring her another drink. "Ya' can't tell good wine from bad. Go on, have another. And drink it slowly this time."

"No." Shaking her head to clear it, Lolita pushed away the second cup. "It's disgusting. `Sides, I'm too young to drink anyway." The after-effects of the first shot were beginning to creep up on her. Her stomach warmed uncomfortably and her cheeks flamed with a heat she never knew before.

"It gets better an' better."

Sure. That's what all the boys say when their ladies don't like the first taste of the wicked fruit.

Wait. What? She wasn't thinking straight anymore. Sake was different from the nasty. Sake was sake. The nasty was...the nasty. She couldn't imagine how she had confused them both together.

_It gets better an' better..._

The words swam around in her mind. Speaking of which, her mind wasn't working properly. Neither did it help that she forgot where that grey matter was supposed to be. But the warmth was slowly beginning to feel good. Really good. Like it was enveloping her in a secure bubble.

Lolita found herself reaching for the second shot.

"That's it..." Tasuki's voice drifted in from very far away, sometimes blasting clear, sometimes just rippling the surface of her senses. She was still conscious. Her thoughts were yet coherent. Well. Not as coherent as they used to be. But she was still thinking, wasn't she? Same thing.

"Hey, it's not so bad now." And her voice had not yet slurred. She wasn't drunk.

Third shot.

Fourth shot. She was still thinking.

After the fifth, she wasn't so sure what she was thinking about anymore. Yet on she went. On and on and down and down slipped that wonderful liquid fire.

The source of control...hmm...yes, the brain. What? Oh, the brain. Right. It was still in tip-top shape. The grain of the wooden table was scarcely noticeable as it slid closer and closer. And the din of the tavern, too. She could just barely make out that awful noise.

"Lo. Hey, Lo."

"Hm? Yeah?"

If she didn't look so drunk, Tasuki would have been amused by the sight of her clinging onto the bottle for dear life. But Lolita was slumped down onto the table, eyes barely staying open. He suddenly remembered that it was the first time he had ever seen her drink. One glance at the bottle made him curse himself. How could he have been so thoughtless to give a beginner his favourite blend? _He_ was the booze master; _she_ was just a forced-to-tag-along. It was even a miracle she was conscious thus far.

"That's `nough drinkin'," He pried the bottle from her. "Too much of this stuff could seriously kill a bear."

'`M not a bear..." She came with the jug, but let go only to fall forward into him. "`M Lo. Right? Tas? `As m' name, right?"

Easing his responsibility against himself, Tasuki gingerly stood up. A few men the next table over were already leering at her. "Time tuh' go," he muttered, tossing money onto the bar counter.

"Wha' `bout...Chiri?"

Damn. She hadn't forgotten. And after all the trouble he took to make her, too. "Chichiri? No doubt. He's going to kill me. Hotohori, too. An' Mits. An' the others. `Cept maybe Nuriko."

"Who?"

"Forget it."

"W...why?"

It had begun to drizzle. Throwing his coat over her, Tasuki swung Lolita up his arms. After a moment's hesitation, he ran into the light rain, hoping to get back to the palace before it poured buckets.

"Why Tas?"

"Why what?" he replied distractedly, splashing into puddles left over from yesterday's downpour.

"I...dunno. What?"

It began to rain heavier, but at least the palace was in sight now. Putting on a burst of speed, Tasuki closed the distance, sprinting right past the sleepy guards, across the courtyard, and into the palace complex. Lolita was murmuring incomprehensibles all the while. He found her room and set her down on the bed, shaking rainwater from his coat.

"Don't tell anybody where we were."

"Huh?"

It was hopeless. Lolita blinked bleary eyes at him, struggled to sit up, and fell back down, drops from her hair showering miniscule diamonds onto the pillow. "Don't tell..." he began, but stopped at the sight of her beatific smile. It had been a while since he last saw that untroubled look. "Just go to sleep. And shut up in the meantime," he finished, brushing the last of the moisture from her face. As he turned to go, she caught at his fingers.

"You're a good doctor, Tas...A really –" she yawned, "– really good psych – psycho –" Her brow scrunched up in thought "– psycha – doctor."

"Yar' welcome," he replied with a smirk, figuring maybe it wouldn't be too bad if she couldn't keep their little secret outing to herself while she slept.

A/N: Totally random. It might multiply into a few chapters or not...depending on reader response. If it does, expect fluff. Maybe a lot; maybe not much. We'll see. The pairing here is pretty obvious. For all the Chiri fans, I'm sorry. The dear monk isn't usually a heartbreaker, but I _badly_ wanted to jump right in the middle of a Tasuki scene without bothering with the whole 'entering-the-UotFG' hoopla. So yeah. Don't worry if it's confusing now. The whole business will unfold itself later on...if I get reviews...

Oh, right. Standard disclaimers apply.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Fushigi Yuugi and all its characters belong to MOI~~hahaha! (Watase and lawyers come running, threatening bloody murder) Okay...I take it back... (huaaaaa! Where'd that machete come from!?)(blends into the horizon) All right. On with the story...

***

Chapter two: Mornings After Only Get Weirder and Weirder

If the sun was shining, there was no way she could tell. Screens she never noticed before were propped at the windows, completely blocking the sun's morning light. Her bed curtains were drawn, flooding the space with a cocoon-like darkness. Lolita thought whoever was behind it mighty thoughtful, for Tasuki's little therapy only left her with a massive headache like she had never known before. Somewhere in the hazy spaces of her room, a door opened and closed.

"Lolita-chan, na no da?"

She froze, heart stammering at the voice. Seconds later, Chichiri had drawn the bed curtains apart and she was staring up at him, foggy mind clearly registering the gentle expression. Uninvited, he sat on the edge of her bed, causing her to ignore the horrific protest of her head as she scrambled up.

"Aren't you hungover, no da?"

"I am."

"Then maybe you'd rather lie down, no da."

Ignoring him, she blurted out, "What are you doing here?" and then bit her tongue with a mental reprimand.

"We were wondering why you weren't at breakfast, so Tasuki told us about your trip to town yesterday," he replied calmly. "I came to see how you're feeling, no da."

"Just dandy, thanks." Swinging her legs over the bed, she moved to push herself up, but only succeeded in staggering in al directions as the world tilted around her. Reflexively, Chichiri reached out, catching her arm before she fell face-forward.

"You should stay in bed, no da."

Lolita complied, snuggling back under the covers, back to him. She hoped Chichiri would get the message and leave, but he continued to hover by her, sending little jolts of electricity down her spine every time his hand brushed her as he smoothed down the covers. Her head continued to pound, and the relentless hammering in her chest did nothing to alleviate the discomfort.

"Stop it," she finally said after forcing her eyes closed and having them involuntarily fly open.

"Stop what, no da?"

"T-" she was going to say "touching me," but her face flushed at the very words that she settled for, "Go away."

His frown could be sensed a mile away. "Are you angry at me, no da? Tasuki hinted that you would."

"He's wrong," she sighed, and it was one that carried regret a hundredfold. "But that doesn't make it less weird."

"What's weird, no da?"

Sighing again, she carefully rolled over to face him. A part of her said it was a very bad idea. "You don't pick things up quick, do you?" Chichiri looked at her blankly so she continued, "What's weird is how you're still so nice to me. You pretend nothing's changed."

"But nothing has changed, no da."

The griping throb came again when she rolled his words over in her head. "Things have changed, Chichiri. Ever since I told you..." she trailed off, glancing away and then stubbornly adding, "Things _have_ changed."

He shrugged. "It's not reason enough to pretend I don't know you, no da, nor you, I. Still, you must listen to me...and do what I told you to."

_Let us just be friends. Forget me. _ Forget him. Ha. "That's easier said than done. You of all people should know that emotions cannot be dictated like that."

For a moment he fell silent, and Lolita knew exactly what he was thinking about. "I know," Chichiri finally replied in a tone as soft as hers. "But you will be able to get past it because over time the heart forgets."

The heart forgets and disappointment numbs itself. Is that it? Well she wasn't buying because for years her heart remained steadfast. It would only scream Chichiri, and had refused to learn any other name. If only he knew... If only he was willing to listen... But he was a monk. And he said he couldn't love. Ever.

"I hope you're right." She really did, because it hurt so much.

Bending down, his lips grazed her forehead very lightly that she thought she imagined it. "I hope so, too." Then he stood up and left her poor heart to race after itself, beating so fast the blood rushed in her ears and it hurt her to breathe. If she had to learn to forget, to erase the automatic hyper-mode her body flew into at the thought of him, she would break down before she was even half way there.

***

Towards mid-afternoon, Tasuki decided to pop in and see how his counselling patient was faring.

"I don't want to see you," was the immediate rejection, sharp from within the shaded bed.

"What?" Just a little annoyed.

"A really nice person just came by with medicine, so I'm fine, thank you. But no, I will not be dragged back to town for another sake-swigging afternoon."

Long sentence. A grin spread across his face. She was better. He marched right up to the bed and pawed the curtains apart. Instantly, Lolita threw her arms up over her eyes, squinting at the sudden glare of the afternoon sun. "What happened to the screens?!"

He laughed. "What're you? Some kinda vampire? `Fraid of a lil' sun?"

"Who told you about vampires?" she demanded, forgetting to retort that that logic would make him a hydrophobic bloodsucker.

"Duh." Rolled eyes. "Ever heard of Miaka? She was the Priestess of Suzaku by the way, an' came from 'nother world where vampires're celebrated creatures o' th' night. And oh, wait. `A think `A missed tellin' ya 'bout Konan's bloodthirsty corpses."

"Whatever." She wasn't going to have this stupid argument the minute the world was coming right back into focus after its alcohol-laced convolution. Flopping back down onto the mattress, she drew the covers up over her head. "Leave me in my blessed darkness."

"Ooh, Shakespeare now, huh?"

"It's not Shakespeare!" came the muffled objection from underneath the blankets. There was a long pause as Lolita let it sink in. Then she threw the bedspread away and stared at him curiously. "Who told you about Shakespeare?"

"Ya did."

"I did?"

"Sure. About Einstein, too."

"I _did_?"

His grin widened at the flabbergasted look on her face and, before she could protest, he hauled her up and dumped clean clothes on her outstretched arms. "Get changed and I'll bring ya somewhere. Ya look terrible with your hair sticking up all over th' place."

Self-consciously, Lolita ran a hand through her locks. "Where are we going now?"

"Not far."

She glared at the smug reflection in the mirror. "Tasuki, I _adamantly refuse_ to follow you anywhere without you first informing me where you want to go and hereafter swearing – no, _promising_ – that we will go exactly where you said we will go and nowhere else."

"Ya're no fun," he complained, tousling her hair.

"Then I'm turning in for the afternoon." Dumping the clothes back onto a nearby chair, Lolita moved to return to bed, but the bandit held her arm firmly.

"What?" He said nothing. They stared at each other for a long minute. The staring turned into glaring. The glaring turned into a sizing-each-other-up contest. The contest lasted a full five minutes.

"Fine!" Dropping her arm, Tasuki stomped to the door. "We're goin' no further than the Imperial gardens if that makes ya feel any better. Now go get intuh' yer clothes!" He halted, flushing as he realized what he said and quickly amending, "Intuh' the right clothes!" before stalking out, slamming the door behind himself.

He waited for her in the hallway just outside, leaning against the sun-warmed wall. Arms folded, Tasuki closed his eyes and let his head drop to his chest. For all he knew, the silly thing was still in over her head about Chichiri. He had seen the monk emerge from her room that morning with a serious set in his usually jovial face, one that showed plainly even through the mask. Instinct had prompted him to march right up and demand what he was still doing in Lolita's room, but a part of him held back, thinking that if Chichiri didn't choose to share that bit of information with him, he would have to live without knowing. That or finding out from Lolita herself.

Lolita. _She_ was another thing to consider long after the three-month romp in Konan yielded no answers as to her purpose for appearing. He had often tried to pry it out of her, sneakily injecting questions about her origin into the most mundane conversations. Fat lot of good that did. The answer was always the same: she wished in a well, offered a sacrificial bit of metal, and found herself messing up his life. When that didn't work, he attempted to ask what exactly she wished for. Then the girl would smirk her irritatingly 'I-know-something-you-don't-know' smirk, lean forward, and whisper, "Secret."

He was pretty sure she had a lot of secrets. Hell, everybody had a secret or two. Okay, maybe more than a couple, but the girl obviously had a whole store of them. Her life before Konan was a secret, though bits of insignificant details would leak out once in a while. Her hobbies were a secret.

_Previously_, Tasuki snorted to add.

She kept many funny things in that backpack of hers – things that blared music loud enough to knock your brains once plugged into your ears, a stick thing that wrote without the need for an inkpot, a square thing that rubbed pencil marks off, a funny pencil thing with lead so thin it was a wonder it didn't break, thick books printed with foreign letters that looked uncannily like a spell book, and many others. But the thing she most treasured – something hidden from anyone's sight for the longest time – was a thin book more than a foot wide and several inches long.

After her arrival, Tasuki was the hardest to convince that Lolita was just a regular girl, and took to spying near her bedroom to soothe his suspicions. Then late one night he happened to walk by her window. The light was on, and the girl was hunched over with the book on her drawn knees, her back leaning against the opposite side of her bed from the window. The mysterious book was open, and she was writing something in it.

Convinced that she was a sorceress of some sort out to render Chichiri's magic impotent so she could take over the kingdom and then the world, Tasuki broke through the window, diving straight towards the bed. Sadly, he miscalculated, and shot forward over his mark, crashing right into Lolita, throwing them both to the floor. The book skittered across the polished wood, lying open a few feet beyond their tangled mess of limbs, its contents finally displayed before admiring eyes.

He saw a sketch of the plants growing in contained profusion as seen through her bedroom window. It was rendered in morning light and had yet to be finished, but the striking clarity of line was there, along with tiny notes that dotted the margins of the page. Picking herself up, Lolita gathered the loose pages scattered across the floor, stuffing them back into the sketchpad with a glare thrown his way now and then. At that moment, Tasuki was pretty sure she was vowing never to speak to him ever again. It would have suited him fine, except that he knew the fault was completely his. So as soon as he had recovered his senses, he apologized, throwing in a stammering praise that at first met with a narrowed stare. The girl had a problem with self-confidence – something slightly alleviated only after he had reinforced the first compliment.

It took a few days, but at last she relented and allowed him to scan the pages. Eventually, she even tolerated him peering over her shoulder while she worked. Then one night he asked her about it and she told him it was the one thing she most treasured – that ability to create. He told her he liked it, then and there feeling a glow of pride as he realized that she had just let him in on one of her secrets.

"Yo."

"Took ya long 'nough," he mumbled, still half-lost in thought as Lolita emerged from her room. Pushing away from the wall, Tasuki rubbed the drowsiness from his face and turned to lead the way down the corridors into the exit towards the gardens. Halfway there, he paused, turning very slowly to look her up and down. Immediately, his gaze stopped at her head.

"`Sup with yer hair?" he complained, marching back into the room to retrieve a comb.

"Ever head of 'bed head'?" Crying out, she swatted at his hand as he attacked the knots hanging mussed down her back.

Sure he did. It looked like... Forget what it looked like. He wouldn't be able to concentrate on helping her move on if she trotted along beside him looking like that. Now that he thought about it, the dishevelled hairstyle actually suited her well. Very...what was the term...? Sexy.

At once, Tasuki slapped the word from his mind, returning to the messy locks with renewed fierceness.

"Ow! Let go!" she screamed, wriggling free of his grasp just as Nuriko came floating by. They stood across each other, Lolita on the verge of whimpering, and Tasuki red-faced with effort, the comb brandished at his side.

"Tasu-chan, be nice to the young lady," the purple-haired ghost tittered, gracefully settling between them. "And what, may I ask, were you both doing, hm?" The mischievous glint in his eyes was far too obvious to go unnoticed.

"He started it!" Sticking out her tongue, Lolita swept past him down the hall, straightening out the abused locks.

Nuriko's attention settled back onto the fiery-haired bandit. "Tasu-chan?"

"I was tryin' to teach 'er good groomin'!" At which, the former let loose a ringing laugh. "What's yer problem?" the younger man demanded.

"Oh, nothing," Nuriko sweetly replied, flying back to the farther recesses of the ceiling. "I just wondered what possessed you to suddenly lecture on that. Toodles!"

Growling vengeance, Tasuki strode off in the direction Lolita took. He found her near Chichiri' favourite spot by the pond, still tugging at her hair. Pretty soon, the monk strolled by, pausing to offer a smiling greeting before sitting down right beside her. They were talking, and Tasuki edged closer to hear better.

"Tasuki's abnormal," he heard her say, as she angrily ripped the knots apart. After her weeklong drama fest, the bandit had expected Lolita to ignore Chichiri, or maybe even leave when he approached. But nooo. She just sat there complaining away, pausing to blush when Chichiri offered to help.

Decline, decline. Tasuki was so sure she wouldn't allow the blue-haired monk to touch her. But then, just as he was composing a cheer, she nodded, and the said monk's fingers found themselves buried in a confusing mass of long, female hair. If face alone could be the basis for judgment, Tasuki would say that Lolita was about blowing up with giddiness inside. Yet she knew that Chichiri's actions were but platonic.

He had to shake his head. The girl was either clueless, plain stupid, or masochistic, rubbing salt into a fresh wound like that. Seemed like he would have to be the hero again, rescuing the damn damsel from her self-inflicted distress.

"Oi, Chiri!"

The monk looked up as Tasuki crunched down the gravel path waving the tortoiseshell comb. "You might need this." Ignoring the acid glare Lolita bore into his face, he deposited the thing into Chichiri's waiting hand.

"Thank you Tasuki, no da."

"You're being awfully helpful," Lolita sardonically agreed, adding extra emphasis on the word 'awfully'. Deciding that rolled eyes was answer enough, Tasuki plopped down across the pair.

"Tell me again why you're still here." The words were muttered so softly no one should have heard. Except of course, she had to. Casting a wry look at him Lolita replied,

"I guess that's because I still haven't found the magic wishing well that would whisk me back home."

Chichiri sighed at their bickering. Tasuki's fondness for the girl was plain as day, but the bandit would insist on exasperating her. "Lolita-chan, I don't think Tasuki really means it, no da. He just likes annoying you, no da."

"He's sure making progress," she grumbled. Chichiri was doing his job well; the comb slid through her hair almost without difficulty now, and the rhythm of the teeth gliding up and down her scalp was perfectly soothing. After Tasuki fell silent, Lolita found time to feel pleased about the fact that her beloved Chichiri was handling her hair. Was. He had stopped.

"Chichiri?"

Her companions shot each other nervous looks, now and then scanning the surrounding foliage. However, before she could ask what the matter was, a bright glow expanded from the sky, for a second brightening the surroundings with brilliance stronger than the light of day. A scream trailed in the air for the length of time that they had to shield their eyes, growing louder and louder as it plummeted closer towards land before being silenced by a painful splash into the icy depths of the pond.

"That was a human scream!" Frantically wresting his garments off, Chichiri plunged into the pool, slicing through water in a desperate search of the source of the sound. Several metres away, he saw a female figure drifting aimlessly, suspended between the surface and the murky, rocky bottom. He swam towards her, panic slowly replaced with relief when he saw one of her arms lift towards the surface. The newcomer swam upwards, weakly paddling until Chichiri grasped her around the waist and hefted them both to safety. On shore, Tasuki and Lolita were waiting to take his bundle.

The girl let herself be pulled to land, sucking in huge lungfuls of air as she crawled further into the bank, and then flopping onto her back. Dripping wet, Chichiri carefully approached her.

"Are you okay, no da?"

She nodded, wheezing a barely comprehensible reply between gasps. Then, pushing soggy bangs from her face, she gingerly sat up to look at each other them in turn. Growing wider and wider with disbelief, her eyes finally settled upon her saviour.

"Oh, my god! Chichiri!" In a flash, she was up and clinging to his neck, throwing him backwards onto the grass as he unsuccessfully teetered to keep his balance. "I can't believe it's really you!"

Tasuki snuck a look at Lolita. He expected her to be livid with jealousy, or maybe snapping with unsuppressed rage. Anything but that lost look she wore as she sat there on the grass, wet sleeves clinging to her arms, dress fanned out very becomingly, but with no one to see. His heart went out to her whose object of love was currently sprawled underneath a stranger he had just saved.

Just then, for the first time in his life, Tasuki was angry at the injustice of it all.

**A/N: Is anyone still reading? :::crickets::: Oh, my. Anyway, a big thank you to whoever found his/her way down here after actually **_**reading**_**. If it' not too much trouble, please leave a review. They keep me inspired. :)**


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter three: Unexpected Visitors Have Never Helped the Healing

She was very beautiful – smooth hair clinging like inky rivulets down her wet shirt, which had gone semi-transparent to reveal patches of the toned white skin they stuck onto. Likewise, her voice was pretty – pure and sweet. Just watching her made Lolita's insides roil with pangs of inferiority, and quickly, she swallowed the lump beginning to form in her throat. Out of the corner of her eyes, she could see Tasuki watching her, his face an unreadable mishmash of emotions. Unwilling to appear affected, she drew herself up and moved to return to the palace complex.

"I'll just let the others know somebody else has...come..." Unheard, she turned around, picking her way back in the blanketing dimness of the coming twilight. Just the tiniest twinge of hurt tugged at the fact that no one heard what she said. It was the total opposite to when she first arrived, where everyone hung on her every word, as if she had anything very important to say. Then they found out she had no known purpose, and the rapt attention simply became a friendly notice. But now another girl has come, bouncing into Konan through a holy-looking light, no less. That had to mean something. And Lolita was afraid because if they chose to leave her, she would be completely helpless. She had always considered the three months so far spent in Konan to be nothing more than a pleasant, dream-like vacation, and never really picked up anything useful during that time. Nothing that would help her survive in case she had to fend for herself, anyway.

From behind her, three voices floated down the gravel walk, all in animated conversation. The new girl knew the seishi's names beforehand, and was explaining how she had fallen into their world. Eager to escape the excited lilt, Lolita hurried forward, stumbling in the dark as she missed a knotted pine root that webbed its way into the path. She remained on the ground for a moment, catching her breath and willing her ears to block out the voices.

_It is impolite to eavesdrop. It is impolite to eavesdrop. It is impolite..._

"I had wanted to meet you for the longest time Chichiri-san!"

The sharp intake of breath came out a hiss of air through tightly clenched teeth. Where it lay steadying her on the tree trunk, Lolita's hand tightened into a fist. She could feel the first waves of irrational anger seep into her blood and she squeezed her eyes shut in a vain attempt to control the tremors of rage threatening to take over her body.

Of course the new girl would want to meet Chichiri. Everyone wanted to meet Chichiri. Everyone claimed to love him. Everyone... As that last subduing thought settled in her mind, she calmed down a little, though it was the sedation of resignation. The newcomer was just one of the many girls who loved the blue-haired monk, as was she.

At first Lolita too loved him. But she did not know what love was then; did not know that with love came great patience and even greater pain. Then the biggest surprise hit her: she could not – and did not want to – halt the feelings that threw themselves deeper and deeper under his command. Willingly, her soul submitted to the torture of the knowledge that he rejected carnal emotions, and for some insane reason, that made him all the more precious to her.

The new girl did not know so many things about Chichiri that she already did. Lolita understood when he was uncomfortable despite the persistent smile on his mask. She was already acquainted with the depth of his sorrow, and, despite the wish to soothe it, kept away to give him his space. Most of all, she could more or less guess – and guess correctly – how he would react to certain situations. These things and so much more, her counterpart did not know, and Lolita worried for Chichiri, certain that the other's rash impulse would drive him back into a mistrusting withdrawal.

"Hey, where's Lo?"

She stiffened at Tasuki's voice. The conversation by the pond stopped abruptly, replaced by the rustle of leaves as someone plowed through the foliage. Around the bend, footfalls crunched on gravel, inevitably moving towards its target.

Damn. Lolita had not realized that she was crying until she made to right herself and found her vision clouded with tears. Hastily brushing a hand across her eyes, she gathered up the hem of her long skirt and resumed her trip down the path, dark-accustomed eyes now expertly pointing out obstacles. She tried to be swift and silent, but it was so difficult in the shifting pebbles that she gave up altogether and sprinted the rest of the way.

"Lo!" The bandit's voice was still audible in the background. Every minute that passed seemed to bring him closer, and Lolita found herself bemoaning the speed he had been endowed with. With fangs like he did, she wouldn't be surprised to find out that he had superior tracking abilities too, like a dog. Suppressing a giggle, she focused on the beacon of light hanging from the eaves a few metres away. The path had now widened considerably, tight tree-lined spaces opening into shorter and sparser ornamental vegetation, so that it was easier to run.

"Lo, there're snakes 'round `ere!"

"Liar," she muttered under her breath, chest heaving with effort while her feet pounded on the ground. Tasuki knew she was deathly afraid of snakes; no doubt it was just another of the bandit's cheap tricks to get her to stop running.

The palace complex was not too far now.

"`M not kiddin' Lo! There're really snakes `round `ere!" Lolita wanted to scoff at his warning, but before she could even form the words in her head, a slim, coiled thing dropped onto the path mere inches away from her, wet-looking body glimmering under the lamplight. In both surprise and terror, a strangled scream tore out of her throat. The reptile lifted its head at the sound, directing its curious green gaze towards the girl careening towards it. They would have collided, were it not for the sudden weight that jerked her backwards, clear away from the creature and onto a hard human body. Seeing that it was outnumbered, the snake stretched out, and then slithered under the brush back into his dirt home.

Legs shaking, Lolita collapsed for the second time in five minutes, sinking against the anonymous body that had so graciously impeded her fall. While she sat catching her breath, the body's owner lent two hands that grasped her shoulders, rubbing down her trembling arms. Sagging against the sensation, she tipped her head back, only to meet somebody's trapezius, as well as chopped layers of orange hair.

"Tasuki...?"

"`At's me."

"Oh, god." His touch was comforting, but it could do nothing against the tremors that still wracked her whole body until it seemed as if even her very nerves were shaking with fear. Lolita shrank back deeper into his chest, tucking the top of her head under his chin. Drawing quivering breaths, she hugged herself and worked to form a coherent sentence.

"B-burn it."

"What?"

"The...the...thing."

"It was just a garden snake; perfectly harmless."

"Venomous python's cousin off a couple degrees," she shuddered. New footsteps echoed somewhere near them, and a minute later Chichiri and the new girl came crashing into the scene.

"Are you okay, no da?"

Her hammering heart discovered a new way of beating, pounding a zillion times per second at the sound of his voice. Unconsciously, Lolita loosened herself from Tasuki's grasp, oblivious to the frantic pace of her pulse as she fought the urge to laugh at his bedraggled look. The gravity defying bangs were messy with running, and little twigs stuck out from his hair. Even his masked face was amusingly adorable, scrunched up with a worry it never had to wear before.

"Juz' a snake. Nothin' more," Tasuki assured gruffly. But this only served to deepen the monk's frown, and he bent closer to inspect Lolita's white face. Instantly, blood rushed to her head, the heat of blushing and the chill of fear colliding in a dizzy spell that had her seeing stars.

"Lolita-chan, you weren't bitten, were you?"

_He forgot to add 'no da'. _The flush of pleasure usurped the earlier shock, wrapping her mind in comforting warmth. "No. I'm okay. It was a garden snake and...Tasuki...came in time."

Chichiri relented, leaning back to rock on his heels. "Good, no da. Shall we head inside then?"

"Let's go get you some dinner," the bandit grunted as he helped Lolita up, still not letting go of her shoulders.

"Actually I...I'd like to stay in my room. If that's...okay."

"I'll bring you dinner!" a shrill feminine voice volunteered.

"No!" the refusal came out more vehemently than she intended, and Lolita turned a little into Tasuki's shoulder to hide her embarrassment. "I-I mean...thanks, but...I'm not...really hungry. You should go on, though. The others... would...love to meet you..." she mumbled apologetically.

The kind offer earned a warm smile from Chichiri, but Lolita caught the implication in the undertone. The other girl wanted somebody to talk to who was from her world. Well. She didn't want to be mean, but a rival _was_ a rival.

_No!_ Lolita mentally groaned, erasing the thought. That didn't come out right at all. They weren't rivals. It was just her freaked-out mind talking. Breaking away from Tasuki, she made towards the compound again, but not before the bandit caught up.

"Thanks Tas, but I can manage from here on," she sighed tiredly. "It was just a scare. No sprains nor broken bones."

"Yeah, but I'm more afraid of yer stressed out mind. It does crazy things, ya know."

She let him accompany her to her door, whereupon the bandit insisted on lighting the lamps inside. Remembering his affinity for pyrotechnic displays, Lolita declined the offer, using the wish for quiet time as an alibi. Finally, though sulkily, Tasuki agreed, and left her to join his friends in the informal dining hall.

As soon as he disappeared around the corner, she slipped inside, cracking the door open just wide enough to slink through. Shutting it quietly, she moved towards the bed, kicking off her shoes and stretching out. Through the window to her left, moonlight filtered in like tiny flecks of stardust, casting an ethereal silver glitter onto the gently swirling dust. Soft wind blew in the garden and, finding its way into the imposing west wing's apartments, shyly prodded at the shutters, creaking the window open to announce its entry into the darkened room. There was no sound within, not even the softest of sighs, and the tiny breeze cast its gaze around to finally settle upon the lump on the bed. It planted a kiss on her cheek, and succeeded in rousing the room's solitary occupant from her grave musings.

Shivering slightly from the cold night air, Lolita rolled over to curl up on her side. The window had opened all the way, letting in a circular pool of moonlight that rippled on the wooden floor. She was cold, but at the same time she wanted to welcome the light. Shaking the conflicting wishes away, she shut her eyes, determined to fall asleep. Almost instantly, a familiar image flickered in behind her eyelids, though unlike before, the strong, serene features presently gripped her heart with a mix of desperation and dread.

She was losing him. For years and years he occupied the glorified pedestal at the centre of her mind, mere presence breathing a fragrant whisper into her consciousness and tracing an undercurrent of security in her subconscious. Where was that comfort now? _Disintegrated,_ came the rueful reply. It was crumbling like old cake, turning into ash, mixing with the water she held in tightly cupped hands, and running out with it. The sweetness of her inner sanctuary was gone now that his being there was questionable. Her private thoughts – her last refuge – were unbearable without him, and Lolita winced to realize how much of her was made up of him. Left nearly without, she felt empty, like a vessel from which wine had been poured to satiate another.

_Chichiri. Chichiri. _

He was drifting away. When he said he couldn't love her that way, he had snipped off a piece of the hope she had so carefully nurtured. But he said he wanted to remain friends, and planted a new seed of hope inside her. Maybe he could never return her love, but she might care for him from afar, always keeping her distance, never letting him see past the smiles that hid the splitting pain of every step. If she could just love him that way, it would be enough. To see him unruffled, safe...it was more than enough.

And then that other girl had to come prancing this way. She would take him. Two minutes into a new world and she had tackled him into the ground. Lolita expected to see him tense and push her away, but the surprise of the attack kept him pinned. The worst part of the whole episode was that he didn't seem to see her as a threat. Chichiri had responded openly to the physical sensation, for a minute letting his guard slip as he relieved the old, innocent feeling of childish trust.

What happened next she was almost too ashamed to recall. Jealousy. The word was so strong it shook the foundations on which Lolita built her arguments of love for him. If the object of her affections was happy, she should be for him. That was what love was all about – letting go. Or was it? A part of her refused to accept his rejection, and insisted that, given time, he would come to return the feelings she held so strongly for him. But another part wondered: what if it wasn't love she had for him? What if her arguments were all based on selfish, wanton desire? What if...?

She didn't know anymore.

The pure silver of the moonlight intensified into a pounding brightness that seared through her brain, and blinking hard, she realized that her eyes were strained from staring too long between darkness and light. Tears immediately flooded over her irises, lubricating the dryness with their natural warmth. Some managed to leak out, and Lolita rubbed them away, gently massaging in little circles. The activity erased the previous worry from her mind and replaced it with the empty awareness she was so used to. Turning over onto her back, she let the first sluggishness of slumber finally ensnare her.

Outside her door, the orange-haired bandit sat out his vigil. The first hour passed uneventfully, but at least he stopped hearing the contained sobs she loved to indulge in when she thought no one was looking. Deathly silence reigned in the chamber behind him, the stillness almost lulling him to sleep. Leaning back, he stared at the lamp dangling just inside the slanted eaves, moths already flitting towards the glow.

_Ya won't be burned, anyway,_ he thought with a grunt, watching the insects drive themselves against the thin paper screen. _Not like the moron I'm guarding._ Bored, he reached out with his chi. That wasn't something he normally did, but if he concentrated enough, Tasuki could just sweep by another's aura without them noticing. Slowly, he probed forward, growing slightly confused when he couldn't quite find the violent chi he expected. A bit farther, he moved towards the bed, where he felt the gentle heat of another life. Her chi was peaceful, and he could almost hear the rhythmic breathing of rest. Smiling to himself, he pushed off the wall, satisfied that his charge had finally found unencumbered sleep.

***

Having Ami around was like watching over a hyperactive five-year-old. Unlike Lolita who chose to entertain herself in her room, the raven-haired girl practically bounced off the walls. She raced down palace corridors, most of the time narrowly missing students with large piles of books. The victim would glare down at the culprit, only to have her disarming smile dissolve his irritation into a blushing, bowing mess. She'd bat her lashes, the doe eyes looking as penitent as a guilty face could make it; the next minute she was a hundred yards down the hall, rocking on her heels before a pair of ornately carved doors, contemplating the best entrance that would take the occupant wholly by surprise. Through it all, Chichiri was left to trail in her wake, dashing forwards and backwards to keep her from walking into secret national conferences.

At the end of two hours, they had managed to run the greater perimeter of the west wing, peeked into every single chamber that would permit their entry, smacked into a few high-ranking officials, surprised an ambassador, and accidentally found a couple of secret passages.

At the end of those two hours, Chichiri had gone through heart-stopping encounters and emitted countless "Da!-s" that could last him the rest of his life. Thankfully, Ami was beginning to wind down. Unfortunately, she remained restive.

"Ami-chan, do you think we could stop for a rest, no da?" He wheezed, blood rushing to warm the face behind his paper mask. The girl skipped away from him, the fingers clasped behind her back wiggling with restlessness. There was only one part of the expansive west wing they had yet to explore – the place where the Suzaku seishi and Lolita had their rooms.

"When I find your room," she promised, never missing a beat as she twirled on her heel to face him and then walked backwards. "You'll let me in, right?"

Chichiri found himself unable to resist the pleading face and mentally scanned the state he had left his room in. Finding it decent enough, he nodded wearily. "I will, no da, if you promise to sit still when you get there."

"Promise!" Whirling around, she bounded forward, lightly trailing fingertips on the wooden banisters that circled the complex. The blue-haired monk sighed, forcing his tired feet to plod forward. Her energy tired him, but it left a pleasant physical kind of exhaustion that he had not felt for a very long time. It struck him that in recent years the only things that tired him were battles – whether they were ones he fought alongside his comrades, or ones he fought within himself. Though never a fan of anything that left him listless, Chichiri found Ami's slapdash habits quite refreshing.

"Is this your room?"

His ears perked up at the tone in her voice. The singsong lilt was still there, but he knew she was getting tired too. "No, no da. It's Tasuki's room no da."

"Oh." Finally. Her energy was running low. He was beginning to think it would hold out forever. Straightening himself a little bit, Chichiri lifted his head...and saw Tasuki. As did Ami.

In a rare moment, the other seishi was actually silently contemplating the heavens while he sat guarding Lolita's door. The amber orbs were narrowed, brow creased in concentration. Chichiri did not miss the drawn look on his face, but whatever it could have evolved into, it promptly vanished at Ami's greeting. The bandit shot up, tessen in hand. When he saw who was approaching, his defensive stance relaxed a bit, though his face picked up alarm. Flailing his arms around, Tasuki was obviously frantically signalling for them to do something, though what that was eluded even Chichiri.

"Tasuki!" Completely missing the whole act, Ami barrelled straight into the redhead, knocking him a few steps back and generating a short string of profanities before they both fell onto the ground.

"Get off! Go away! Do not disturb! Shoo –!"

"Chichiri is this your room?" From her perch on Tasuki's stomach, Ami twisted around, cocking her head at the monk who rushed forward to free his friend.

"No, no da. This is somebody else's room, no da."

"Let's go say 'hi', then!"

"No!" Though his voice was muffled from the weight on his abdomen, much vehemence still found its way into Tasuki's words. He beginning to grow irritated with the girl. Lolita was fast asleep on the other side of the flimsy doors and he would like to keep her that way for as long as naturally possible. But the mere presence of the little twit threatened even that. She was beginning to whine piteously in a way that, though others might find endearing, was seriously beginning to get on his nerves.

"SHUT UP!"

The air vibrated with the sheer intensity of his voice, shocking everyone into stillness. Ami stared down at him with wide, disbelieving eyes, while the monk's nervous gaze flickered between him and the girl. A very long moment passed in dreadful silence before, very slowly, almost ominously, Lolita's door creaked open. There was nothing but darkness inside. With silence amplifying the portentous ambiance, the soft swish of a gauzy train sent decided shivers down the spines of all those present. The door opened wider, allowing a view of the rest of the rumpled gown up to the sleepy, unamused face above it.

"You people..." Lolita trailed away at the sight. Tasuki was on the floor, straddled by the new girl who still had not changed out of her beach shorts and thin white shirt. Stepping over the bandit, Chichiri had her by the arms, which had gone slack in surprise. Except for the guilt and frozen demeanour common in all three, the expressions on their faces were unreadable.

Suddenly aware of her dishevelled appearance, Lolita stepped back into her room, softly closing the door as she undid the clasps on her head and combed her hair loose. On the other side, somebody sighed, signalling for all hell to break loose. Tasuki went off in a tirade consisting of normal words abruptly broken off by more creative language. There was a lot of shuffling, a thud, wailing, pleading from Chichiri, and some more thuds and shuffling.

"Ya can't go in there!" Lolita started with surprise at the shadow that suddenly blocked the upper, paper-screened half of her door. In a moment, two other shadows joined it, turning it into one whole lumpy silhouette. A high female voice protested, causing Tasuki to back against the door. A whole lot of pushing went on for several minutes before the entryway gave with a loud creak of protest, swinging inwards and depositing a tangled dog pile at the threshold just as Lolita staggered back.

Eyebrow raised, she stared right down at the three. Tasuki had tilted his head backwards, but catching her eye, suddenly remembered the girl sprawled atop his chest and pointedly looked away, face turning a shamed scarlet. Chichiri rolled himself off the heap, slowly shaking his head back into focus. The moment his weight came off her, the cause of the whole chaos jumped up to beam at Lolita.

"Hi my name's Ami I don't think we've met before but everybody believes we come from the same world so I'm really glad to meet you I'd like to be friends if you don't mind can I have your name I think we'll be very very good friends..."

_A mile a minute. _Lolita's head began to ache from being yanked out of deep sleep only to be shoved right into the face of a human machine gun, that sans the tiny stars dancing before her eyes at the sudden bright light piercing into the sleepy dimness of her chamber. _Maybe Tasuki's right. I am turning into a vampire. _A vampire who, before seeing the bouncing pixie in front of her, had never felt the urge to kill.

She giggled, a terrible sound rising from the depths of a throat scratchy from previous crying. Tasuki immediately shot up, looking stricken by her face. Sleep deprivation had left her so jumbled that Lolita began to harbour a grim amusement in imagining how terrible she must look to have caused such a reaction from a bandit who claimed to fear nothing.

"Ami-chan, I think we better go and let Lolita-chan have her rest, no da." The apprehension in the new voice started Lolita wide-awake, and she glanced at Chichiri apologetically. He shot her a tiny smile before standing to herd the other away. But still anticipating an answer, Ami continued to stare, the tiniest bit of hurt confusion clouding her eyes. Lolita's internal devil began to bang against the cage of her consciousness, igniting the desire to torment. But Chichiri's obvious distress over Ami's resistance to his coaxing softened Lolita, and, not wishing to prolong his trial, she relented.

"I'm...Lolita. Great to meet you too," she mumbled half-heartedly, barely attempting enthusiasm. Satisfied, Ami rushed to give her a hug. The contact was unexpected and for a moment, she flinched at the crushing grip before tentatively returning the action.

"We'll play tomorrow, okay?"

Spending time with a total stranger was the last thing on Lolita's mind, but, spurred on by Chichiri's smile, she nodded. "Sure."

"Good night, then!" Skipping back to the monk, Ami dragged him outside, her ever persistent "Is this your room?" floating back from down the hall and ascertained later by the banging open and closed of the doors of the adjacent apartment. As a shriek of laughter bubbled up through the wall, Lolita's false smile slid off her face and she headed back towards the bed.

"Please get the door when you leave," came the mumble from somewhere in the shadows as Tasuki slowly raised himself from the floor. For a long time, he stared at the back of the figure that sat staring outside her window. The stars from earlier were now shaded behind a wisp of clouds that obscured their meagre twinkle. Even the silver disk was not spared, a mist of black wrapping its glow. Only light from the garden lamps outside persisted into the room, inadequate even to outline the shape sitting rigidly straight before it.

Walking towards the door, Tasuki shut it loudly. The figure relaxed at the sound, shoulders slumping in defeat. He tiptoed his way into a corner, blending right into the shadows. Normally, he wouldn't resort to such a sneaky trick even though there was no possible way his victim would find out. But his Lo was a special case. He felt her force herself back to sleep, the peace from earlier replaced by a heavy desperation to escape reality. Sinking to his haunches, he mulled over his knees, worried.

Yes, he worried. And it was all Chichiri's fault. Damn straight, if there was anyone who should be in his place right now, it was the monk man. Instead, it had to be him, the bandit, the one who was completely clueless when it came to consoling people, least of all, girls. Dropping his head onto his knees, Tasuki shut his eyes, forcing himself not to hear the laughter from the other room.

**A/N: And the angst just about stops here. The following chapters will have less introspection, I hope, though the drama will still be there (if I don't slip into a humorous fit, anyway). Thank you to all who read. I'm sorry for those fooled by my first blurb. In my defence, I **_**did**_** plan for this to be lightly funny, but in the end...well, the story writes itself, as that ever-famous entity 'They' like to say.**

**I'm tired of asking for reviews when people don't bother anyway, so I'll just thank the readers and get on with the next chapter. (Is anyone still following this story so far...? :::silence::: Oh, well.)**


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter four: Don't Ignore the Signs

The faint snore came as a heavy rush of air in the predawn, a foreign sound in a lady's bedroom as its occupant awoke. Uncurling herself, Lolita stretched, not bothering to stifle the huge yawn. She rolled over to bury her face further into the pillow and froze upon remembering that she had fallen asleep somewhere in the middle of the large bed nowhere near pillows, much less under blankets. Instantly, rush of adrenaline replaced her sleep-drenched senses, prompting her to spring right up. To her immense satisfaction, a quick inspection revealed that she was fully dressed, though the gown was hitching up, tangled in her legs, and sporting several thorough creases.

Unbidden, a tiny smile curved the edges of her mouth. There was only one person in the world that would be so gentlemanly as to put her properly to bed.

Shaking off the flighty sensation bubbling in her stomach, she got up, changing into the jeans and sweatshirt she had arrived with and had not worn for the longest time. Padding around barefoot, she grabbed the waiting sketchpad and pencil off the nightstand and tiptoed to her door. Little tingles of excitement rippled through her veins at the soft silence that not even the tingle of Chichiri's staff had yet broken. It was so early Lolita did not doubt he was still asleep.

She cracked the door open, already forgetting the scene played out there the previous night. Never noticing the flame-coloured head that dropped off in sleep at a god-forsaken corner of her chamber, she gave a last glance at her room and stepped into the misty morning. Wisps of fog bowed away as she quietly pattered down the open porch into the garden clear across her side of the hall.

Feet bedewed, she trailed down unfamiliar stone paths, traipsing in the growing light. The first orange fringes of dawn were just coming up, soon joined by faint splashes of pink creeping from underneath similarly tinged clouds. Ignoring the smarting nip of the morning air, Lolita made her way up a small, willow-lined incline, selecting the gnarled old one in the middle to sit under. The dampness seeping through the thick denim of her jeans went unnoticed as she leaned back, waiting for the sun to pop through the glowing horizon. Several times she had attempted to capture the fresh look of the garden, but either she overslept, or it got too bright before she could finish.

Time always moved too fast when one was trying to stop it.

Smirking to herself, Lolita flipped over to the unfinished drawing. Today, she would breathe life into that hasty sketch – copy the pale luminosity as it highlighted the white walls of the tower soaring over the edge of the Imperial garden, define the stealthy shadow stretching away from low bushes and vines heavy with fruit... Her pencil moved deftly over the page, dancing down the graceful limbs of ferns, etching the quiet strength of the garden wall bordering the perimeter, catching the liquid slope of the tower roof as it rippled midnight blue. Soon enough she was bent over her work, the real world forgotten as she sought to recreate the magic that would show itself naturally for only one fleeting second.

She looked up...then stopped. Once again, the scene eluded her. It would have to be finished another time. Lolita was getting up to go when the familiar jingle of golden rings glued her in place. A scan over the heavens showed that dawn had come, though day was still an hour away. It was the exact time Chichiri came out for his morning meditation.

Lolita considered scurrying the other direction, but that wouldn't stop him from sensing her presence. In fact, he must have known she was there now, invading his space. She sat in frozen dread, hoping he would turn away and leave, yet at the same time wishing he would walk right on like he used to, perhaps say 'hello', and then let her alone to go...

"Good morning Lolita-chan, na no da." His feet first came into view on the grass beside her, inciting a gasp from one who did not expect him to arrive so fast. Stammering a similar greeting, she let her eyes roam higher up, catching the hem of his kesa, the white tunic, prayer beads... Before she could get to his face, her head whipped back down. Chichiri looked slightly puzzled, but following her gaze, bent over her work. "That's very pretty, no da." Automatically, she slapped the page closed, surprising the observer, who actually took a step back.

Mentally berating herself for the action, "S-sorry. It's a reflex thing. It's not-not you, just my stupid, stupid..." she trailed off, feeling foolishly relieved when he smiled.

"There's nothing to be embarrassed about, no da. You draw very well."

She blushed. Then, remembering what he was there for, gathered up her things to go. "I shouldn't keep you from your meditation. Sorry for...intruding..."

Chichiri stayed her. "It's okay, no da. You don't have to go." He walked a little way down the tiny hill and sat directly facing the sunrise. "Please go on with whatever you were doing and don't mind me."

Biting her lip, Lolita desperately tried to obey. But it was hard when the sun cast such a warm glow over his unmasked profile, showing it to full advantage. The artist in her itched to copy the sight, though for a moment she hesitated, wondering whether it would be invasive to draw him when he was so exposed. But at last her deliberations came to a compromise, and, shifting very, very quietly, she found a new position that allowed her a glimpse only of his back. Angling her legs to support the drawing block, she traced the first faint outlines.

"Ne, Lolita-chan, no da?"

_Snap!_

Skittering across the fresh page, the charcoal lead carved a deep enough trench that ran down the curve of Chichiri's white paper shoulder. Lolita looked up, surprised by his sudden speech. Wasn't he supposed to be meditating? Apprehension flitted inside her. Maybe he realized that he was being made a model and didn't like it? Tucking the broken pencil in her hand,

"Yes, Chichiri?"

"How would you like to see a little more of Konan, no da?"

Sighing that she wasn't the cause of his distraction, she dug around in her pockets for the cutter stuffed there a lifetime ago and proceeded to uncover the rest of her pencil lead before the subject moved away. As it was, the opportunity to draw him like that was already so rare.

"It's okay, I guess," she replied, heart in her mouth. Was he going to propose a trip? Alone with him that would be...

"Then you'd rather go to Mt. Taikyouku on foot, no da?"

Mt. Taikyouku? "Uh...why are we going to Mt. Taikyouku?" Chichiri and Tasuki had taken her there before to ask her true purpose in the world of the four gods, and honestly, the meeting with the divine creator? It was something she'd rather not repeat.

"We have to ask why Ami-chan's here, no da."

_Oh. _"There ought to be no question about it," she replied stiffly. "The gods called her here. She appeared in that bright light thingamabob, didn't she?"

Chichiri sighed. "There aren't any more prophecies about foreign arrivals, no da. We have to know why she's here – why both of you are here, no da."

Lolita rolled her eyes behind his back, aggressively shaving away at the poor pencil, her hand gripping the cutter so hard she could barely keep it in control. "Oh, don't worry about me." Contrary to her dark expression, her voice remained saccharinely nonchalant. Thank god Chichiri was still staring at the sunrise and didn't see her face. "We already know my being here's just a mistake. Go worry over Ami; I'm sure a holy being called her."

Sarcasm dripped into her voice, something that made Chichiri glance at her. "Lolita-chan, please don't think we don't want you here, no da. Paying a visit to Taikyouku is just routine."

"It doesn't bother me; really." Chichiri began to stand just as she lost grip on the blade. Lolita stifled the hiss of pain as the cutter darted forward, scraping off a good amount of skin before jamming deep into the side of her finger, stopping just below a phalange joint. Blood oozed from the laceration, running down her hand in a gush of red. "So, when are we leaving?" she continued conversationally, stuffing the injured finger under the hem of her sweatshirt.

"Maybe two days from now, no da. I want to give Ami-chan a chance to rest before we go." He smiled at her, earning an expertly masked grimace as the heavy material of her shirt grazed over the wound. From the sky, his gaze travelled to the residence areas of the west wing. "I better go, no da."

_Miss Holy Purpose must be up,_ Lolita mourned inwardly.

"Are you coming, Lolita-chan, no da?" With her face twisted into such a bizarre expression, he finally caught on. "Is there...something wrong...no da?"

No! Everything's just dandy. The pain in my finger has even begun to numb itself, thank you for asking. Oh, by the way, you wouldn't know how to stop the blood, would you? Didn't think so. But, no! That's no trouble at all! I'll just have to wash out the stain before it cakes through the sweatshirt it's soaking.

"I'll...catch up with you...later on."

He gave her a confused look, but put on his mask and nodded. "Then...I'll see you."

"Y-yeah. See you!" As soon as he was out of earshot, Lolita retrieved her finger. By then, the blood had settled in a sticky scarlet blot over her entire left index finger. Shoving the cutter into a back jeans pocket, she picked up the discarded sketchpad and pencil, stuck them in her mouth, and resumed grasping the injured appendage as she dashed back to her room.

The return trip was hastier and less pleasant than the departing one, especially since Tasuki was stirring awake in his corner, and her banging inside was the last jar that yanked him back into irritable morning consciousness. Doing away with the customary yawn and rubbing of eyes, he jumped up, ready to pounce, but broke into a fit of laughter when he saw what was hanging from her mouth.

"Good mornin', lil' puppy," he cooed sardonically, ambling over to pat the top of her head. Lolita spat out her sketchbook and pencil to snap back.

"First thing in the morning and you're being insufferable. Try to be helpful for once, would you?"

"Ya got yer own hands –" A raised eyebrow sent his attention down her arms to the bumps of that were wrists under a bloody sweatshirt. "Fuck!"

"Finally, somebody has discovered my plight."

Scrambling over to a dresser, Tasuki yanked the drawers open, tossing out various articles of clothing as he riffled through the contents for clean towels and bandage. "Wha'd ya do? Stick yer arms intuh' the meat grinder? Shit, I can't find the fucking towels!"

"In the meantime, you could help me stop the bleeding."

He whipped around. "We need a doctor for this. I don't know how to stop mutilations from –"

"I've still got _hands_!" Pulling them out from under the folds of her clothes, Lolita shook the said limbs at him, showering red droplets onto the floor.

"Say it, don't spray it," the bandit muttered, making a face at the crimson trickling down her arm. Reaching into a tiny cupboard on the vanity table, he triumphantly retrieved a roll of bandage. "C'mere."

Lolita followed, plopping down onto the plush satiny seat before the jug of water and basin on the table.

"Stick yer hands out." She did, and very carefully, Tasuki poured the water over them, gently wiping away the dried blood. When all the deceptive red was gone, only the ripped flesh remained, bright against pale skin. "Hurts?" he murmured when he saw that she was chewing on her lip. Lolita shook her head.

"What happened?"

"Sharpening my pencil. I got agitated."

"Why? Chiri kissed ya?" There was a hard, bitter tone in his voice that she cringed to hear.

"N-no. He just told me about going to Taikyouku. You know, to find out why Ami's here and everything."

"An' th' thought `f seein' the old obaba scared ya intuh a flurry, huh?"

"Yeah."

He paused from bandaging, staring at her face long and hard. Finally, he returned to his work, tearing the strips of gauze and knotting them. "If `A didn't know ya, I'd say ya were jealous, Lo."

She snorted, allowing him to cradle her hand. "Sure. You would." After a moment, her averted face met his and she smiled wryly. "But you know what, Tasuki? I am. I am jealous of Ami."

"Hey..."

"Don't worry, though, because I won't do anything stupid."

_Nothin' that'll make Chiri sad, if that's what ya mean by 'stupid'._ Shaking the thought from his head, he manoeuvred her arm so that the hand pointed upwards. "Keep the cut above the heart. If ya don't, it might start bleedin' again," he explained, moving away from her. "Ya might want to get changed, too, so I'll wait fer ya outside, and we can go to breakfast when yer done." As an afterthought, he added, "Don' take too long."

***

Face securely buried in her arm, Lolita finally let out the huge yawn she had been trying to hold back for the last few minutes. The heat of Konan summer had nothing on the refreshing bath she just took, and now, waiting for Chichiri and Ami to arrive, the coolness was making her remember just how early in the morning she had gotten up. Across the room, Tasuki slid a glance over to her, deadpanning an "Above th' heart, Lo. Above th' heart."

"It is," she replied, raising her head and yawning again before she could stop it. The arm with the injured finger was sticking straight up from the table she slumped all over, and the position was just beginning to strain her shoulder some. In fact, the first tingles of numbness were starting to creep up the pads of her palm. "What's taking them so long?" Sitting upright, she rubbed her eyes.

After Chichiri had voiced his desire to consult Taiitsukun, Hotohori decided to call a meeting, apparently to discuss plans. To Lolita, for whom travel was a snap of the fingers and a car's drive or a flight away, the whole thing was going to be a bore. What on earth should they discuss? The colour of pyjamas to pack? She snorted at the thought, earning a curious glance from Nuriko.

"They're not here yet," she said defensively, and it came out sounding like a whine. The femininely inclined seishi's worried pout did nothing for her agitated spirits.

"Now that you mention it, it is rather uncharacteristic of Chiri-kun to be this late."

"Or to be late, for that matter," rejoined the regal Hotohori, examining the hands he spread over the long conference table and smiling happily. "It has been so long since I came into this meeting room for the purpose of having a meeting."

"What's on the agenda anyway?" blurted out Lolita, no longer able to hide her impatience.

"Important things!" piped up Chiriko, turning from a scroll he was scanning. "For instance, the kind of horses to be used, routes to take, things to take along –"

"Shouldn't that last be left to our discretion?" Lolita broke him off. Tasuki interrupted her in turn, letting out a loud guffaw.

"If we leave your packing to _your_ discretion, we're gonna need a hundred packhorses, ten thousand mules, and a few dozen ox carts."

"Don't come crying to me then when you run out of hand cream!"

Nuriko sighed, floating over to catch Lolita's attention. "Darling, please. Tasuki will never, _never_ in his life, _ever_ need hand cream," which loud whisper caught enough of the girl's attention to send her wide-eyed gaze over to the bandit.

"When you're old your hands are gonna..."

"Live off the land!" called Ami, choosing that very moment to barge inside, leaving Chichiri to close the door behind them.

"I'm sorry we're late, no da,' he bowed apologetically, sliding into a seat beside Lolita. At once, Tasuki left his corner and positioned himself on her other side. One by one, the seishi drifted to their places around the table, Chiriko and his paper and brush and ink to Hotohori's right. Clearing his throat, the (ghost) emperor gestured towards the large map spread before them.

"It would be safest to follow the trade routes," he began, tracing a translucent finger along a newly painted squiggle snaking around the base of an ink mountain to join a thicker, older squiggle branching out in all possible directions. "This new one goes around Eiyou and passes through several small north-western villages, so it's not too crowed. A detachment patrolling the area keeps it safe, too. It joins in with the main trade road, where from there, you may follow a northeastern course. Unfortunately, there is no direct road to Taikyouku, so you're going to have to break off from there and be on your own."

Lolita was peering at the map, which was really nothing more than a large patchwork of animal hide blotted with mountains, rivers, and foreign characters marking their names, and began to get a little worried. Taikyouku looked pretty far from Eiyou, a thousand times – maybe even more than – the distance between the palace compound to the suburban walls. If it took roughly half a day to get from the palace to the wilderness outside, she couldn't begin to imagine how long it would take to get to Taikyouku manually. Glancing at Chichiri, she ventured to ask, and her mouth nearly locked open at his reply.

"I can't tell for sure."

"What do you mean you can't tell for sure?" She was beginning to regret immediately agreeing to his proposal earlier in the morning. _Stupid dawn. _"We're going to get there, right?"

He nodded. "Of course. But there will be the usual delays that come with travelling, so assuming that nothing goes wrong, it would take around two months to get there."

Two months? Two damn _months!?_ In her world, it would take thirty minutes to an hour to fly from the palace to the base of Taikyouku, and then maybe a forty-five-minute drive to get to the top, navigating perilous cliffs, raging rivers and all that jazz. But _two months!?_ On what? Horses, most obviously. They'd be riding for days and days, never stopping for anything. And it would be _so_ deathly boring. And Ami would be there the whole time, going on and on and on about god-knows-what and who-cares-what and hogging all Chichiri's attention with her childish cuteness and Lolita would just wish herself dead than be thrust into that situation.

"Lo, are you okay?" Tasuki nudged her, seeing her frozen with a stricken face. Very slowly, she shook her head, landing back down on earth. Why Chichiri wouldn't teleport them there, she knew – he wanted to make sure Ami was pure enough to get into Taikyouku. But even that implied suspicion of somebody she considered a rival of sorts wasn't enough to cheer her up.

"I'm...I'm going to get a job."

"What!?"

Pressing her lips together, Lolita looked at each of the seishi in turn before her eyes finally settled on Ami, who still wore that irritating innocence and looked earnestly at her. "I'm going to get a job," she repeated slowly, gritting the words out one by one behind clenched teeth.

"Why would you want to do that, no da?"

"Because..." and even Chichiri felt a chill go down his spine by the way she slid that sidelong look at him, "I want to go home. So while you people are enjoying a trip to the sacred mountain the hellish way, I'll somehow support myself, return to where I first dropped here, and find my way back to the right time and the right place."

"But you said..."

"I miss my blow-dryer. I said that a month ago and I'll say it again: I miss my blow-dryer so I'm going home."

The seishi all looked puzzled, but Ami simply giggled. "You'll survive two more months without a blow-dryer. Think of what you're going to miss if you go!"

"She's right, no da."

"For a chance to be behind a Lambo again, I'd gladly trade in muddy fields, dusty roads, and surprise rain showers, thank you very much." With that, she scraped her chair back, moving to go.

"It'll be tons of fun!" Ami promised, jumping up, eyes shining in excitement. "Sure Konan's different from the world you're used to but that doesn't make it much worse."

"The society I grew up in was pretty ethnocentric. I guess I picked it up," she replied flippantly, trying to contain the increasing agitation that had begun to build up ever since Ami popped into the room. A tense silence now settled over the gathering – an apprehension only Ami did not seem to notice.

"Think of this as an opportunity to learn about a new culture, then!"

"So that's why you're here?" Lolita suddenly snapped, holding the urge to smile sarcastically as Ami started back. "Why did_ you_ come? I'm sure it wasn't just because of an irrational wish, is it?"

The other girl opened her mouth, but just as soon closed it again. Several times she tried to say something, but every failed attempt seemed to further prove a secret excuse. The seishi exchanged questioning looks.

"You don't have to answer that question." Conscience edging on her, Lolita decided to drop the subject. "I'm sorry I asked it in the first place. Go to Taikyouku, though, and you just might find out why you're here." _If you don't, then join the club,_ she wanted to add, but settled for excusing herself and leaving. As she closed the door behind herself, Lolita heard Hotohori break the awkward quiet and steer the conversation back to where it was supposed to be going. Tasuki was probably boring holes into the table, Chichiri frowning behind his mask, trying to figure out what had gone wrong. When she heard Ami murmur an excuse to leave, Lolita hurried back to her room, certain that the trip was not going to be discussed for the remainder of the seishis' meeting.

She couldn't help the nagging feeling that she had been too mean, though.

**A/N: First of all, let me apologize to those who reviewed before I posted chapter 3. I know, I was whining in my author's note there, but that's only because I haven't seen the reviews yet. Anyhow, a big hug to ****ChichiriLover****, the first one to review! Thanks also to ****i wished on her star!**** T.T **

**Finally, chapter four. This one took longer in coming (maybe cause I'm running out of highs...or ideas, whichever...) but at last it's edited and posted. (sigh) I'm really happy with the way this chapter ended, mainly because I didn't want to see Lo beat herself up over Ami anymore. At least here, she bites back. (That's my girl!) Poor Gen-chan, though. Yeah, weird seeing him all strung up over a girl...(shrug)**

**Oh, right. The disclaimer. Ah, well, don't wanna go there. Everybody knows we fic writers don't own a cent of FY's returns anyway. If we did, we wouldn't be writing fanfiction about it...**


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter five: Take notice of Your Protectors

That day, the grey of the skies matched that of the concrete road. Heat from a car muffler rippled the air as the vehicle raced down the long stretch. Eternal sand whizzed by on one side, while buildings fuzzed into impressionistic blurs on the other. Inside, the female driver glared at the empty road, her scowl intent on something other than the road. Soon enough, the convertible passed the limits of town, following the asphalt path as it stretched onwards into the distant horizon. Previously tall houses shrank into the ground, sprawling across boundless emerald lawns. Swerving past the posh residence areas, the car slowed to make a turn, curving left towards the fenced beach.

_Late summer wasn't the ideal surf-hitting season. The cold front swept in over the waters, making the air too chilly for swimming. Waves were also rougher, thrashing, breaking foam over jagged rocks. Yet the driver didn't seem to mind as she braked into an abrupt halt beside the long cement stairway that led down into the sand. Yanking the key from the ignition, she tossed it into her backpack, fishing out a wildly ringing cell phone._

"_Mom?" A pause, during which the driver leaned over to open the glove compartment, rustling papers inside the brown Manila envelope there. "Yes...I was just dropping off the confirmation forms. No, I won't be back for dinner. A few friends have asked if I wanted to get together. We're hanging out at Chloe's place." Another, longer, pause. "Yes, mom, I'll be careful. Bye." _

_Making a face, the girl killed her phone altogether, tossing it onto the passenger seat before slamming the glove compartment shut. She didn't usually lie, but she was absolutely not going to submit those documents. Shouldering her pack, she locked the car on her way out._

_Just as expected, the beach was deserted. A month or so ago, the place had been swarming with people – beach buds with huge surfboards, teenagers in bright bikinis, boyfriends sporting washboard abs...even screaming spoiled brats who had nannies running around flailing sunscreen. Now, they were all gone. Probably indoors, watching movies on giant projectors, or else lounging in their bathroom Jacuzzis. _

_The girl shook her head, sand catching in her hair as the wind blew through it. Picturing out the beach in the full, swinging heat of summer only made her more depressed. While everybody was out celebrating the end of the school term, her mother had cooped her up indoors reading sheet upon sheet of Chopin and Stravinsky and Rachmanioff and Schubert. All for the sake of a goodly education, she was told. _

_Sure. Whatever. _

_Maybe that was why she was banging out concertos on maniacally expensive pianos while her schoolmates went on illegal drinking sprees and got high on coke. _

Missed all that in the name of good breeding_, she thought sarcastically.. _

_Actually, her mother had conceded that her penchant for the fine arts could be granted a position on the things "the fairer sex must learn". Then she had to walk into the studio and see her darling daughter up to her elbows in oil paint that took forever to come off. It wouldn't have been so bad if they didn't have to attend a dinner party that night, and she couldn't wear the strapless Oscar de la Renta because of her rainbow-splotched arms. _

_That heralded the end of her paint-covered smock dreams. _

_Good thing her mother didn't know about her sneaking out late at night to get drifting lessons from a close friend. Or that the silver Lamborghini they got her for her sixteenth birthday initiated that new fanaticism. Or that she was going to rip up those stupid letters and throw them into the abyss. _

Goodbye Vienna Music Conservatory whatchamacallit! Score for Lolita!_ She silently cheered, patting the envelope tucked under her arm. _

_The envelope. _

_Stopping in her tracks, she turned around, sneakers beginning to sink into the shifty sand. The car was a long way up – a hundred thousand steps back to the road. And so were the bloody acceptance forms. She was already more than halfway to the edge of the ocean. Shit. There was no way in all seven blazing hells she was going to go back to her car. Kicking the ground, she slogged forward. Seemed like the fates were on her case again. And they were screeching in laughter, watching her through their shared eyeball. _

_Ooh la la. Her mother was definitely going to get her way now. _

Vienna Conservatory, here I come.

_Nudging a thick, rotting piece of tree trunk, she sat on it just as an incoming wave crashed onto the shore, dodging the wave-breaking boulders around it to make a beeline for her. Icy waters splashed against her denim-covered shins, spray racing upwards to drench her thighs and grey sweatshirt in salty water. Her day was getting better and better. Seething inwardly, Lolita got up, moving inland towards the stone porch of a nearby beach house._

"_Not exactly the right weather for the beach," the blond receptionist laughed as he saw her come dripping in. _

"_Hasn't been my day, Rick," Lolita countered with a wry smirk. "Think you could get me a towel? I need to go to the post office."_

_He raised an eyebrow, appraisingly looking her over as he half-turned to disappear into a side door. "You just passed the post office. It's in town, remember?"_

"_Yeah...just now. Anyway, I'll be waiting up front." Waving weakly, Lolita trotted back to the open porch. Behind her, she heard the office door click shut. After blatantly lying to her mother about spending the night at a friend's place, she couldn't exactly return home. The only viable option was to stay at the beach house, where she hoped Rick would keep her company. They have been friends for a while now. Surely, he would agree to stay overnight if she asked nicely. Sighing, she trotted over to a well recently built into one side of the entrance. The water inside was clear, orange goldfish darting below the reflection of the murky sky. Already, a few coins glimmered on the stone floor. _

_Ha. Wishing for good things was nearly impossible. By the way things in her life were turning out, she was bound to screw up the best wish. But maybe it would be fun... A sign hanging from the metal canopy bars over the mouth of the well warned people to be careful of what they wished for. Lolita rolled her eyes at the message and dug around for loose change._

Just for kicks. Rubbing her find on her sleeve, she clasped the coin between her palms, ready to drop it in the water the moment she made her wish.

Be careful of what you wish for...

_What could she ask for? What was so crazy, so beyond anything the human mind can classify as possible? What did she _really_ want? _

_Behind her squeezed eyes, a handsome, scarred face smiled, throwing her heart into a stuttering fit. She had seen this face so many times she could practically memorize every single detail there. The gentleness calmed her, made her forget there ever was a world to worry about – the world that was not entirely made up of his serene presence. _

_It was a long shot. It was so impossible. It could never, ever happen in a million years. _

_But it was what she wanted._

"I wish..." she swallowed, the beach house falling into a soundless void around her. The earlier anger that prompted her to see the ocean melted away until there was only his face, and the intensity of her feelings for him. For a fleeting second she remembered that it could not happen. Yet still she whispered, "I wish for Chichiri."

_With a soft splash, the coin dropped into the water. _

***

Missing morning meditation wasn't the way to begin Chichiri's day, and his finding every little crisis confounding only amped up his suspicions. Tasuki might have been on to something when he declared that girls were bad news.

The thought coaxed a tiny smile from the monk's face. That comment was made a couple of years ago, back when the only "normal" female the fiery bandit knew was the Suzaku no miko. With Lolita around, though, he knew the younger man had to eat his words. Chichiri tried not to let it show that he knew Tasuki was infatuated with the girl. His actions around her were telltale enough – from the way he always sprang to her defence to the way he hovered so protectively around her. Like that morning. For Suzaku's sake, Chichiri thought, he was a monk. Tasuki had nothing to fear with his being around Lolita. Of course, it didn't help that she confessed to loving him, and that the majority – no, practically _all_ – of their acquaintances had caught wind of it.

He sighed, kneading his crossed legs. Life used to be so simple. At least, as simple as it could get after battling the forces of evil. When Tenkou was defeated, he decided maybe it was time to move forward. Tasuki had always insisted that the past was the past: there was nothing one could do to change it, so it was just best to forget and move on.

That was easier said than done. He had been so used to the life of repentance, of non-desire, that it was hard – no, almost impossible – to imagine the kind of life waiting for him outside that. Also, a part of him railed against it. That was the same part that insisted on remaining solid in grief, reminding him to feel guilty about atrocities already forgiven.

Chichiri closed his eyes again, intent on shutting his mind to the world. But the calm silence of his room felt just a little odd. His body remained tense, alert, waiting for the shrill call he had known for less than a day. Strangely enough, he realized that he anticipated hearing her, that he couldn't focus on meditation because his physical self wanted to be outside, running down the halls with her again. Shaking his head, he finally opened his eyes.

The child had gotten to him. She gave him a glimpse of the future he could not picture outside his impenetrable shell and made him remember how it was to be so carefree. Take that morning, for instance. He had taken her down to the pond where almost instantly, she waded into the water, trapping little fish in her hands. He couldn't help joining her, discarding his pole to play her game. Between them, they only caught one fry. Chichiri was showing it to her when, with a tiny flick of its tail, the fish jumped out of his hands back into the pool. She jerked in surprise and he laughed, splashing her with the water. She retaliated. Had he not realized that they were already late to the meeting, they might have stayed there all morning, drenching each other by turns.

He told her about the trip as they walked back to the palace. She was so excited, and ran all the way to the meeting room. The discussions began, and somewhere in the middle, Lolita suddenly snapped.

Chichiri frowned. It wasn't that he blamed her. True, they couldn't possibly understand how it felt to be in her place – displaced from family and friends and the world she belonged to – and they probably underestimated that loneliness. He could understand her feeling homesick, though he couldn't fathom why she would take it out on Ami. Yet there was something in the latter's reaction that raised questions.

Lolita asked _why_ Ami had come. Not _how_. _Why._

Indeed, why? Getting lost in the Universe of the Four Gods wasn't a _choice_, was it? Girls from other worlds had to be called by a divine force to be able to set foot in his world. Then again, hadn't Taiitsukun said that she did not know the reason behind Lolita's coming?

Chichiri found himself wondering about the girl's answer to her own question. If he asked her outright, what would she say? Would she be like Ami? paling and refusing to answer? Meditation forgotten, he stood up, determined to satisfy his curiosity.

***

The freaking girl was stubborn. Tasuki had ascertained the fact minutes after she first arrived into his world, walking right into a trap his men had set. Bundled up in a net swinging several feet off the ground, she was not exactly the happiest person alive, and was screaming at the bandits who made crude jokes and tried to hit on her. When they hauled her up to the stronghold and let her out, she was practically snarling. Tasuki had pointed his tessen at her, and what did she do? She openly dared him to burn her into a crisp. How she even knew about his powers was beyond him, but before "Rekka Shinen" was out of his mouth, she had ducked beneath his outstretched fan and kicked him hard in the shin, apparently for "condoning unspeakable behaviour in his men."

The memory made him smile. It wasn't everyday that he met somebody like that, much less a girl who knew all about the Suzaku no miko and all her seishi. Shrugging out of his thoughts, he peered into nearby stores, muttering curses when he still couldn't find her.

He should have known. When she said she was going to look for a job, he should have taken her seriously and walked out with her, making time to banish the idea from her thick, pig-headed skull instead of hanging around listening to Chiriko and Hotohori make half-hearted comments about the journey. Any fool could see that they were all burning to talk about the scene Lolita made. She wasn't normally aggressive, so any vicious outburst against anyone but himself definitely tickled everyone's curiosity. Add Ami's cowering exit to that and Nuriko was practically foaming at the mouth to speculate what it was all about.

When everyone fell silent, indicating the end of the meeting, Chichiri excused himself, and Tasuki did not waste time following his example. By then, only ten minutes later, she had gone to the city. That left him no choice but to look for her, afraid that wearing clothes from the palace would get her mugged.

Pounding music suddenly met his ears and Tasuki glanced up, none too happy for the street parade marching down the opposite end of the street, directly in his way. Caught in the crowd, he was swept to one side of the road, nudged this way and that until he found himself at the outermost edges of the throng. He was scrambling to keep on course when he looked up and saw her two back streets away. A group of troublemakers were edging around her, one feeling in his pocket for a weapon. Spewing a few choice curses, Tasuki raged forward, pushing past the crowd, which had stopped moving to watch the parade.

"Run away dammit!" he bellowed, shoving somebody's elbow out of the way. Lolita was just standing there, looking really angry as the men closed in around her. Several of them flicked out knives, and his eyes widened. She wasn't really planning to vent on... "Lo!"

Right before his eyes, the thugs lunged forward, weapons upraised. She managed to evade the first one, but staggered right into the two behind her, both of who instantly grabbed her arms, knives slanted against her throat.

"What are doing here all alone, ne-chan?" jeered the leader, coming up to pinch her cheek. Lolita made to bite him and received a hard slap. "Ya know, I don't think you have much on you. But we cou' make much off you."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

He looked her up and down, grin revealing missing teeth as his eyes settled on the undulations of her body. "I meant, there're bastards willing to pay a hefty sum fer a new bitch."

Understanding dawned, but fear dropped into her already seething internal cauldron, the contents bubbling into a surge of reckless bravery. She was just itching for a good argument. "Gee, I guess they'll be disappointed to learn I haven't got any bedroom tricks to show off then," she spat, pulling a sardonically distressed face.

Her captors laughed aloud, the leader leaning forward to examine her closely. "Don't worry about that. Most o' my customers're pretty good teachers." His hand found the curve of her waist.

"Get your filthy self off me," she scowled, eyes narrowing.

"Right! We wouldn't want to damage the merchandise, would we, boys?" Patting her cheek, the leader nodded towards a dilapidated building farther down the alley. "Keep 'er quiet. I'll be back with the buyers in a while."

Still struggling to free himself, Tasuki saw the leader leave. Barrelling out of the crowd, he took a second to steady himself before running in the direction of the remaining men, who were hustling Lolita down the street. To his satisfaction, and also to his frustration, she struggled, throwing herself back, rendering her captors off balance, and taking the opportunity to wriggle out of their grasp. He was mentally cheering, but then one of them caught the long sleeve of her gown, jerking her hard against a wall. In an instant, one of them wrapped his fingers around her neck and pointed a knife against her stomach.

Tasuki put on a fresh burst of speed. The fire he had seen in her only moment ago was snuffed out now, and Lolita only looked scared and hurt under the strangling grasp on her throat. The thug was saying something, slowly releasing his hold. Whatever reply she made Tasuki did not hear, though he clearly saw the heavy hand descend on her face again, leaving a stinging red mark. He was going to _kill_ those bastards.

"Rekka –"

He couldn't finish, though, because that very moment, a powerful chi materialized in a shower of red. Chichiri appeared in the middle of the group, knocking out the men in a colossal wave of energy. Even Lolita sagged against the wall, and would have sunk to the ground had not Chichiri's arm snaked around her to keep her upright. He watched not twenty yards away, willing himself to move yet finding that his body refused to cooperate. He watched the whole thing unfold and end mere seconds after his fellow seishi's glorious entrance. Amidst the fallen bodies, the monk and the girl sank into the former's kesa.

A few of the thugs were beginning to stir. Although Tasuki cast a deathly glare at them, he had long lost the urge to pick a fight. Sheathing his tessen, he turned around, heading straight back to the palace.

All was quiet when he returned, and for a moment the bandit wondered whether Chichiri had really teleported to the palace or decided to go elsewhere. Upon second thought, though, he decided on the first choice, knowing that the monk was far too sensible to bring a shocked person anywhere far from medical attention. So he strolled down the row of bedroom doors, keeping his eyes peeled for any sign of Ami. He had had enough trouble with hints of her lurking around every corner, and he was pretty sure Lolita would not want to hear about her after all she had gone through. Thankfully, the corridors were deserted, and he ambled over to Lolita's door.

There was hushed talking inside. He could make out Chichiri's voice, and Lolita's nervous reply.

"...I told you guys already – I made a wish, and it warped out of bounds and brought me here. Why do you want to know so much?"

"This morning you asked Ami-chan her reasons for coming to this world. I was wondering the same about you, no da."

"Why does everything always have to boil down to Ami?"

"This is not about her, no da." Chichiri's tone dipped a few notches. "Or is there something you want to hide?"

"I'm not like her!"

"It can't be too easy to come here, no da. Either the gods called –"

"That's the whole reason I'm trying to get back home!" Lolita's voice had risen to an agitated near-scream, clearly audible through the door. "I've learned my lesson! Be careful what you wish for and all that crap. I shouldn't have made that stupid wish! I shouldn't have come!"

"Lolita-chan –"

"Leave me alone!" At her hysterical tone, Tasuki couldn't hold it in any longer and burst into the room. Chichiri sat on the bed beside Lolita, one of his hands firmly grasping her arm. She refused to look at him, hair veiling her turned face.

Hot confusion began to well inside the bandit. It wasn't like the monk to be so compelling. "Why're ya makin' such a big deal of it, Chiri? We've been through this before."

His comment went unheard. In a stern voice Chichiri said, "Please listen, Lolita-chan. This might be very, very important."

"Chichiri!" Angry now, Tasuki strode over, yanking his grasp away from the girl. "Leave 'er alone, dint'cha hear!?"

"This is none of your business, no da."

"It is too my business!" he contested fiercely. "What's yer problem? Th' Chiri I know would never act like this! If Lo doesn't want to tell you why she's `ere, there's no reason for your forcing it outta her!"

"If you'll leave –"

"Fine. I'll tell." Chichiri stopped to look at the young woman, whose voice had returned to its soft whisper from minutes ago. "I came for selfish reasons." Drawing a shaky breath she went on, "My parents were smothering me. They were dictating my future, and until the day I arrived here, I never really had the guts to stand up for what I wanted. That day, I was going to destroy the acceptance forms my mom wanted me to mail back to the music school. But I left the forms in my car. Instead of taking the time to fetch them, I went and found myself a wishing well, and just for fun, made a wish." Finding his silence incongruously reassuring, Lolita met Chichiri's masked eyes, irony clear in her hard words. "You want to know what I wished for? I wished for _you._" He flinched, but this time, she lay a hand on his face, forcing him to look at her. "Yes. I wished for you because wanted you so much. I _loved_ you so much. With my coming, I lost everything I used to take for granted in my world. But here, there's you, and you're the only thing left for me to want badly enough to defend. And I hoped one day you'd have an inkling of that. Looks like...I was wrong."

Ripping her warm touch from his skin, Chichiri stood up and left abruptly, the door banging shut behind him.

"What about you?" Tasuki jumped at the sudden sound. "Do you want to know my secrets?"

"Lo..." Head down, she looked so completely humiliated that Tasuki was torn between staying and comforting her and racing out after Chichiri.

"Just ask. I'll answer every single question you can think of."

The hand at his side clenched into a tight ball of anger. "There's nothin' I want to know," he growled. Casting a swift, final look at her curled-up form, he stalked out. Chichiri was striding down the hall, not too far for him to catch up. Tasuki knew the monk could feel the hate vibrating off him, but he didn't care. Planting a firm hold on the older man's shoulder, he swung his arm back, fist colliding with Chichiri's jaw as the latter turned. The seishi glared at him as he reeled backwards, but Tasuki only shoved him away.

"_That_ was for Lolita."

**A/N: And **_**this**_** chapter is for you, InkedButterfly! I wanted to put off writing this and everything, but then you came and shooed procrastination away with your review. Thank you so much. I'm really glad you can relate to Lolita. It's not everyday readers tell you that. *wink***

**(runs to Chiri-chan) I'm soooo sorry! I've been abusing you horribly in this story. Here's an ice pack for your face. **

**Chibi Chiri: That hurt, no daaa... *sniff***

**Tasuki (stares at his hand): Oops. Guess I don' know `m own strength.**

**For all those who haven't yet reviewed, do feel free to click the button down there and leave one. If there's one thing I'm deathly afraid of, it's my OCs turning into Sues, so I'm gonna need your help policing Sue-ifications. I know you're reading...**


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6: There's a Calm After a Storm, Too

Tasuki's enraged shouting roused her from whatever thoughts she could have been nursing. By the sounds of it, Ami could tell that the bandit was yelling at Chichiri, whose name fell into the accusations every now and then. Wondering what could have caused the whole scene, she poked her head into the hall.

Both men seemed to be squaring off, though only the younger one looked ready to fight. Chichiri was similarly aggravated for an instant, but he shook his head, murmured an apology, and turned to leave. As he did, though, their eyes met, and Ami saw the quick temper of youth roiling with exhausted repentance in its depths. She stepped forward, meaning to console him, but he brushed past her with barely a nod. Anxiety made her turn to Tasuki, but he only stared her down. When Ami refused to be intimidated, he growled, "This is all your fault," before turning on his heels and striding away.

Ami stood lost, not knowing whether she should retreat back into her room and leave the situation to resolve itself, or stand half in the hall, half at the doorsill and wonder what had happened. As it was, she did not have to make a decision. Moments after Tasuki left, Lolita's door creaked open. The girl scanned the empty corridors, saw her, and shrugged apologetically.

"Whatever he told you," she began, seeing Ami's puzzled expression, "he did not mean. Tasuki has this big mouth that tends to spout out anything he can come up with on the spot. He's not much for looking before leaping, and that's really immature. I've told him so dozens of times, but all he does is snort and ignore me like –"

"He...he, um, I think he...hit...Chichiri," the other interrupted uncertainly, remembering the mark she saw on the monk's face.

"He _what!?_"

"Just...just maybe," Ami hurriedly added. "I heard him say stuff about Chichiri not acting in his right mind and that he should just..."

Lolita sighed. "That was probably my fault." Stepping outside, she held her door open. "I know I wasn't very civil this morning and I apologize. You're new here, and shouldn't be going through all this unnecessary stress before a journey. So, if you want anybody to talk to..."

"What about...?" Ami made a vague hand gesture.

"The guys? It'll blow over," Lolita replied, trying to sound nonchalant. "There's nothing either of us could do about it now. Chichiri will either ignore you until you evaporate or will disappear himself. Tasuki, no doubt, will beat you up and fry you into cinders. So we wait until they've collected their thoughts, and...they'll come around."

Despite her anxiety over the last few minutes, Ami managed to let out a soft giggle and followed Lolita back into the latter's room. "You seem to know Tasuki very well," she observed, catching sight of a couple of spell-ridden papers Tasuki used to summon his wolves.

Following her gaze, Lolita laughed. "A privilege after months of getting onto each other's nerves." Nodding towards the desk, "He gave me some of those magic slips and said that if ever I missed anything from my world, I should just write it down and it'll pop out. He likes to be a toughie, but he can be a really decent guy." She paused, rolling her eyes. "Mouth aside, I mean."

Ami smiled. She didn't think Tasuki was using too much foul language when he was around Lolita, though that thought could be saved for another day's discussion. Softly, she asked, "Did you ever get to use them? His magic paper?"

"Yeah! The first time –" She suddenly broke off, face warming into a faint pink. At Ami's raised eyebrows, however, Lolita shook her head, as if to say it was all silly, and continued, "The first time I just wrote Chichiri's name all over the papers. When Tasuki came to teach me how to use them and Chichiri illusions kept popping out, he thought they were broken!" Flopping onto the bed, she gestured for Ami to do the same. "He really thought I was a psycho-weirdo-stalker, but I was stuck in the middle of the bandit hideout! Sure the place was crawling with men – he even told me I could have my pick if it keeps me from obsessing over his friend – but bandits are _so_ not Chichiri!"

Turning, Lolita could see that Ami was laughing right along, and their shared laughter somewhat wore the cold walls between them down. She wasn't going to open her heart to a stranger who happened to come from a similar world, but she had to admit that it felt pretty good to have a girl to talk to after hanging out with just guys for so long. Rolling over onto her stomach, she propped her chin on her palm to look up at Ami, who remained sitting upright.

"So back home...who were you?"

The other girl started. Shrugging, "Oh, nobody. I waitress-ed at a local restaurant, went to school..."

"How'd you juggle school and work?" Lolita asked, wide-eyed, as she scrabbled up.

"You have to, when you live alone." The moment those words left her mouth, Ami winced, biting her lips closed. But the reaction she was expecting never came. Instead, Lolita only looked more awed.

"That is so cool!"

She smiled weakly. "Yeah...I guess. So, um –"

"You can do anything you want! No curfews, no nagging parents, no getting dragged to corporate dinners, no son-of-business-partner dates... That's absolute freedom!"

"There's no such thing as absolute freedom," Ami rejoined quickly, hoping to end the discussion. "Anyway, when we leave..."

"When _you guys_ leave."

She frowned. "Y-you're not coming?"

"Nah." Lolita waved a hand. "You heard what I said, right? I'm going to go back home. All the same, you guys have a safe trip."

"How're you going to go back home?"

"Drop a coin into every well I see and make the same wish?" she joked, but Ami's serious expression didn't change. Lolita's shoulders slumped in an admission of defeat. "I don't know. But if there's a way in, there has to be a way out, right? I mean, how hard can it be?"

Both girls fell into silence at the last question. Finally, Ami spoke up. "We can all help you search."

"You're going to Taikyouku."

"I'm sure Chichiri won't let you go off alone. Even more so for Tasuki."

She struck home. Lolita stopped twiddling her fingers long enough to look up hopefully. "You think so?"

Ami smirked. "You're the one who's been here longer. You should know."

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Chichiri prided himself on his self-control. No matter what the situation was, he was the one who thought for the group, the one who had to keep his cool because not doing so would throw everyone into havoc. But what happened with Lolita was a mistake. A big, embarrassing mistake. He had allowed himself to be carried away by self-serving tendencies. If Tasuki had not barged in then...even he shuddered at the thought of what he might have done for the sake of information.

Now that he thought about it, it really was ridiculous. He could find no reason to mistrust Lolita – not after all that time spent together. She was nothing but kindness and caring, not only for him, but also for others. And he could never suspect her capable of anything severe enough to thwart their journey to Taikyouku. Nor would she have the motive to do it.

Stopping in his tracks, Chichiri looked up from the cobblestone lane. He did not have any particular destination in mind when he began walking. Escaping from the tenseness of the west wing and into the bright sunshine to think seemed just the thing, and for hours, he supposed, he had been going and going and going. And just now, he found himself by the immense structure that housed the royal horses. A groom's boy was busy sweeping out the stables, barely noticing as Chichiri walked past the first rows of towering warhorses towards a strip of adjacent stalls that contained the sleeker, leaner travelling breeds. Crossing the enclosed run, the monk slipped into the long building. It was dimmer inside, the only light coming from the double barn-like gates and the skylights built into the roof. Rustling noises compounded with the snorts of the animals echoed from one side of the stable into the other, where grooms polished the riding equipment.

Chichiri walked in the silence, relishing the soft crunch of the hay scattered all over the dirt floor. The stables held such quiet he never before thought existed there. Of course, there was the occasional whinny, but in a place where horses outnumbered people, he wouldn't think twice about bleeping it out of his thoughts.

A glance upwards revealed darkening skies. Lamps were lit from random spots around the stable, their heavy light not penetrating much beyond a few feet. He heard soft talking, and another circle of orange flooded a hitching post up ahead, outlining a grey-spotted horse. Shadows moved together, flickering on the grass-strewn floor. Moments later, a masculine silhouette melted into the surrounding dimness, leaving a girl waiting beside the horse.

Unintentionally, Chichiri started at the sight. The lamp hung just above the girl's head, clearly illuminating her face. The monk swallowed nervously. Every mistake had to be corrected, and just now, the victim of his mistake was right before him. He inched towards her, making no sound.

Lolita was murmuring to herself, trying to pass the time until the stable master returned with the promised groom who would teach her to ride. Horses weren't her top pet choice, but in an era like where she was stranded, they were the major, if not the only, way of locomotion, so she had to learn to cohabitate. A stable boy's shadow cut into hers, and she turned with what she hoped was an excited expression.

Her ready smile turned into a flinching paleness at the sight of him. Chichiri took a step forward, but Lolita automatically edged backward, stopped only by the hitching post. The uncertainty in her face fed his guilt.

"I'll, um, just be...leaving now," she mumbled, trying to slip past him.

"Are you learning to ride, no da?" Chichiri tried to keep his voice light.

"Yeah...Yes."

"I can help, no da. If you'll let me," he added as a hurried afterthought. Lolita looked like a cornered rabbit, blocked on one side by the horse and by him in front and on the other side. The last thing he wanted to do was frighten her. She hesitated, but seeing his open smile, albeit masked, relented.

"Na, no na." Unhitching the horse, he gestured for her to get up, but she only stared at him blankly. "Do you need a lift up, no da?"

Flushing slightly, she turned away. "I haven't gotten to that part yet."

Somehow, he wasn't surprised. Flipping the reins over the saddle, Chichiri easily swung up. Then he scooted back and held his hand out for her. Although dubious of the little space left on the saddle, she let herself be hoisted in front of him. The horse plodded forward, inducing a surprised yelp. Her companion laughed gently, shifting closer to fold her hands over the reins.

"It's okay, no da. We're not going beyond a slow walk," he assured as he taught her how to guide the horse towards the gate and out into the grassy corral.

"Weird," Lolita muttered. Beneath her, she could almost feel the movement of the animal's muscles as they rocked back and forth on its back.

"You've never ridden a horse before?...keep your eyes forward, no da." Being so near her, Chichiri was surprised by the chi he could sense. It was like seeing a blot of brown bird and then coming closer and seeing the thin white streaks on the outer feathers, as well as the downy tufts underneath it. He could sort through the web of emotions and pick out exactly which one she was trying to hide. At times it felt invasive, while at others it was...comforting, as if she was a book opened especially for him to read.

"There was never the need to ride horses in my world. And where I live, you don't see them outside the polo field." Lolita appreciated Chichiri's easiness, through she still could not relax enough, what with his body practically touching her. Not too long ago, she would have died for him to voluntarily come that close. The sentiments were a little watered down now, but they were nevertheless still there, keeping her uncomfortably keen on their proximity.

Chichiri tried to swallow the involuntary smile pulling his mouth at Lolita's attempt to push down wave upon wave of giddiness. Wrapped within his, her hands were cold – nervously cold – and she was barely breathing. When she did remember, though, they were long drags of air that was anything but natural.

Their horse had found its way outside and was happily trotting around the enclosure. Overhead, the grey skies threatened rain.

"How do you go about in your world, no da?"

"Cars," was the instantaneous reply. "They're these mechanical things that can be pretty small or really huge," she explained when he echoed her answer. "Some of them can fit only two people, while others are used to lug around just about anything, from soldiers to furniture to petroleum. The smaller ones – we call them sports cars – can go hundreds of miles an hour. Except of course, you don't drive that fast unless you want a speeding ticket. We also have... Sorry. I'm babbling."

"No problem, no da." He was rather enjoying hearing about a world unimaginable to him. Plus, talking about it seemed to be loosening her up. The first guarded aura he sensed had dissolved into practically nothing now. "What do people in your world do, no da?"

"Lots! Of course, we still have farmers and everything, but their jobs are a lot easier now, thanks to scientists. They're the people who invent really cool stuff and discover miniscule particles seen only under electronic microscopes and magnified thousands of times –" She was interrupted by a laugh.

"I meant to ask, no da, what do _you_ do in your world?"

"Oh." Lolita fell silent, going back to counting to the rhythm of the horse's pace. Chichiri was thinking of dropping the question when she replied, "Nothing. I mean, I go to school, hang out...but that's about it." Hearing herself made her suddenly realize how wantonly people in her world were living. Here, in ancient conditions, everyone had a job. Even the imperial concubines who were generally thought to live purely idle lives took to playing politics. Everybody contributed to something. Everyday, people were discovering new things.

When she continued, it was with a downcast note. "In our world, people compete on becoming the biggest consumer. In school they have all these petty popularity wars, and get a kick out of humiliating their fellow man. I just realized now..." Twisting in her seat, Lolita looked up at Chichiri. "If I remained in my world, I probably would have been one of those selfish clones who thought the universe existed for them."

"I'm sure that won't happen, no da," he said kindly, surprised by the sudden serious turn their conversation had taken.

"I was already on my way there," she replied dryly. "Chichiri, I really am sorry."

"For what, no da?" he blinked in surprise. If there was anyone who should be apologizing, it should be him.

Lolita shifted again to look at him more fully. "For what I said...earlier. Maybe my coming was a joke played by the gods' assistants when they weren't looking or something –" He had to grin at that theory, "– but being in Konan really isn't bad. It's different, like Ami said, but that doesn't make it any worse than my world."

"Does that mean you're coming with us, no da?"

"If...if you still want me to."

His grin widened. "Of course, no da!" A blast of chilly wind combed through the enclosure, overturning a few buckets and bringing with it the first spattering of rain. "I guess we can call it a day, no da." Grasping the reins, Chichiri turned their horse around and back into its stable, where a groom was already waiting at the gate. Lolita apologized to the stable master for running off, but he waved it away and helped her down instead. Chichiri waited for her to join him before finding the walk that would lead them back to the palace fastest. The shower was already turning into a heavy downpour, which would undoubtedly last the night before bowing away in the morning like all late summer storms.

"Thank you for today!" Lolita had to bellow through the din of the thundering rain as she jogged beside Chichiri. They were already soaked through; there wasn't much point in running for shelter. All the same, the chill of the wind slapping their wet clothes as they ran was refreshing.

"I hope you learned something, no da!" Chichiri hollered back, grabbing her hand and making towards the west wing, the outline of which was faintly visible through the curtain of water and fog.

Lolita's only reply was a grin as he glanced at her. There was no way she could have retained anything with teaching methods like that.

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**A/N: Sorry for the short chapter. This took a while because I did not know what to do with the people after last chapter's scene...*Gasp* I must have gone through hundreds of mental scenarios, each deleted until I finally sat down and determined to type. Much of the credit goes to KittyLynne for describing Tasuki in love. It's not shown here, but it will be soon. (I hope.)**

**Thank you also to the readers; even more so to the reviewers. *Hint hint* I really need feedback to know how my writing's doing. :)**

**Till next time!**


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7: And I Think I'm Starting to Care

Chichiri and Ami were busy loading packs on the horses when Tasuki stumbled into the courtyard, a dazed Lolita in tow. Her clothes had been rushed on and were askew, her hair was not brushed, and she yawned in a marathon.

"Tell me again why we have to leave so early?" she shivered, pulling the coat tighter around herself. Wandering to a random horse, she patted it, and then just stood stupidly, wondering what she was doing hanging around a freezing, foggy courtyard. One horse over, Tasuki was fastening the last of the bedrolls to the saddle. He tossed a bunch of carrots her way.

"Feed the horses."

Lolita floated away, stifling another yawn as she waggled the vegetables at the animals. Tasuki raised an eyebrow but decided not to comment. The task at least kept her silent for a while. When the carrots were gone, however, she strolled back into the middle of the group. "Why do we have to go so early?"

"We're taking a secret route, no da," Chichiri humoured as he made a final routine check. Ordinarily, Lolita would have made a face at being treated like a child, but that morning, her mind was too bleary to care.

"Why do we have to take a secret route?"

"`Cause we're gonna bust some criminals a la FBI!" Ami giggled, swinging up her brown horse. The rest soon followed suit and Lolita was left alone, pouting up at them.

"No, seriously. Answer my question."

"`Cause we don' wanna take th' time tuh' go through the whole city an' follow the conventional merchant's route. Some guards are gonna let us out a back door – gate – of th' palace, an' nobody's gotta know," Tasuki explained hurriedly. He bent to offer her a hand up at the same time Chichiri said,

"Maybe you should ride with me, no da," remembering their previous riding 'lessons'. The bandit scowled, and before Lolita could reply, hoisted her up. Chichiri chose to ignore him and instead turned his mount around to a collection of outbuildings.

A weary-looking sentinel guarded the narrow gate practically embedded into the wall. The metal slab of a door whined, opening just enough to allow the passage of the travellers. When they had gone a few metres, the entrance squealed shut behind them, once again blending into the grey rock surrounding it.

"This is it, no da."

The southern exit could probably have offered a better reception with the suburban settlements beginning to clump near the city walls. But the outside of the north wall, near which the palace was located, looked like the turf beyond a crumbling medieval fortress. Curious looking plants sprouted amongst weeds, looking perfectly comfortable where they were.

"Let's get going then!" Ami replied to Chichiri's earlier statement, spurring her horse onward. They picked a rocky way along the god-forsaken wild meadow while in the background, Lolita silently prayed for the extinction of snakes.

Tasuki was beginning to get disgruntled by her presence. She had wrapped both arms tightly around him, and was most obviously clinging on for dear life. Their horse was not as cooperative as he had hoped, either, jerking and bouncing along the already difficult terrain. As it was, he had her tight around the waist, shifting every once in a while to keep her from falling off. After the tenth shift in five minutes, however, he could no longer bite back an observation.

"You've got lousy balance."

"You've got lousy horsemanship skills," she retorted. Chichiri glanced to check up on them, only to be waved away.

"If you're so sleepy, why don't you just go to sleep and shut up?"

"I don't trust you not to drop me. Cerebral apoplexy can kill, you know." He rolled his eyes. Trust her to make snide comments he couldn't care to decipher.

Trotting out of the overgrowth, they finally found the trail. Ironed out by the many caravans of goods rolling over it in and out of the year, it was so much flatter than wile ground. However, the ever-present ruts were there, though after last night's rain, they were more like muddy puddles than inconvenient potholes. From up ahead, an early merchant waved at the travellers.

A few more caravans huddled together at the sides of the narrow trail, which was wide enough to allow the passage of only one trailer at a time. As they progressed later into the day, the file that once consisted of the single caravan and three horses lengthened into a lumbering convoy.

In time, the sun came out full force. Ami happily rode into the sunshine while Lolita groaned, muttered about having had too much sun before, burrowed into Tasuki's shoulder, and eventually gave in to her earlier drowsiness. The little group had fallen behind a silk merchant, and the man, noticing the inexperienced trekker, kindly offered his trailer. Tasuki was only too happy to accept. His legs were beginning to ache from having to support her, and his arms were balancing an unconscious body more than they were steering his horse. But Chichiri did notice that the bandit rode particularly close to the silk merchant for the duration of it.

By the time they stopped mid-afternoon to water the horses, Ami had lost most of her energy. She slouched over her saddle, and was strangely silent. Lolita, however, was the opposite. She bounded around fresh from her nap, hovering over anybody who would care to tolerate her presence. It kept up until they pulled off a little way into the edge of the nearby woods to stop for the night.

At once, Chichiri retrieved his pole and set out in search of the river rushing so audibly. Most of the merchants had started to settle down, and the jolly flames of campfires dotted the trail. Once their fire was set, Tasuki ambled off through the trees, somewhere in the direction Chichiri took. Not about to be left behind, Lolita tagged along.

"Where are you going?" Tasuki chose to ignore that question the first five times. He was tired from the day's journey and really didn't feel like answering any questions. Besides, her incessant queries beginning to get to him.

"None of your business!" the retort came a little too sharply. Taken aback, Lolita paused. Tasuki continued to plod forward, but when the footsteps behind him ceased, he too, stopped to turn around. She was already making her way back to camp. Making the _wrong_ way back to camp. "Oi!"

"I get your point!" she hollered back.

"Damn woman! That's the wrong way!"

"Go on your walk! If I get lost, I'll just put my clothes on inside out and I'll find my way back!" Was that humour he heard, or just reproach? Tasuki couldn't tell, but it made him suddenly guilty. Muttering under his breath, he ran to catch up with her.

"What? Yer sulking now?"

"No," she replied, turning surprised eyes at him. "You implied that you wanted me gone. I'm just doing what I'm told to do."

"An' ya had tuh choose tonight tuh' be obedient." Rolling his eyes, he grabbed her elbow and steered her into an overgrown footpath. "C'mon."

A quarter of an hour later...

The moon had risen high over the tippy tops of the trees, and it was steadily growing cooler. From its perch on a branch somewhere, an owl hooted its welcome to the strangers stomping around its domain.

"Have any compass, per chance?"

_Now _Tasuki was sure that was a reproach. "We're not lost," he insisted, though he sounded dubious himself.

"Real manly."

"Thanks."

"It wasn't a compliment," Lolita mumbled back, picking her way through the moist earth. Leaves carpeted their path, engulfing them in a humid, earthy smell. "Why can't you men just ask for directions? It can't diminish your chauvinistic male pride, can it?"

"And from whom do we ask directions?" the bandit snorted back. "The spirits o' th' undead roamin' these forests?"

"You know, that's a pretty good idea."

His head whipped around to gape at her. "Yer kiddin' right?"

"Oh, no. I'm sure the spirits of the undead have been here longer than us. They'll be nice about giving directions, I promise."

"Y' don't make promises for..." he shuddered slightly, "..._them_." Then, before his companion could open her mouth, he dragged her forward towards a faint bubbling sound. "The river's near here. Chiri must be there, too." He ran excitedly, relieved to finally stop being disoriented. The land sloped uphill, but when they reached the crest and peered down, there was no river. "Uh-oh."

Yanking away from him, Lolita flung herself onto the ground. "You know what? Forget it. We're lost, and we're not gonna get back until morning."

"There's still your clothes inside out to rely on," Tasuki half-heartedly muttered, sitting down beside her.

"You're not seriously suggesting I strip out here in public, are you?"

The thought was vehemently denied. Yet Tasuki blushed at the mere suggestion and was about to say that they weren't exactly "in public" before catching himself in time and shutting up.

"Hey. Lie down."

Given that he wasn't musing too innocent thoughts, her simple command made him jump a mile and flush hotly. "Wh-what?"

"Lie down," Lolita repeated calmly. She was stretched out on the ground, arms thrown in abandon on either side of her. "The stars are really pretty." He snorted, but obliged. Silence settled between them. They were lying close enough that if he reached out a little, Tasuki could hold her hand in his. "Don't you like stars?"

"Sure. They're 'ere every night. `Can't get rid of 'em if ya tried."

She made a face at him. "Well, I like stars."

"You only like one of 'em," he mumbled morosely.

"I heard that."

"It's true!"

"We're not having this conversation." They fell quiet again for a few minutes. Wind swept past them, rustling the grass. The little twinkling lights moved a little on their inky screen. "You can't see stars like this back home."

"Why not?"

"Because the fake lights are brighter than the stars," Lolita shrugged. "Anyway. Can you show me the constellations?"

"Th' rest're covered by trees, so y' can only really see Chiri's."

"Which is it?"

Tasuki pointed out the clump. Then the wind came again, blowing clouds out of a way of a new group of stars. Excited, he sat up to point them out. Chiriko's...Nuriko's...Hotohori's... He was too caught up to notice that Lolita wasn't paying as much attention anymore. At the end of his lecture, he found a cold hand wedged between the ground and his left hand. Lolita had curled up to face him.

"Lo?" He rubbed her shoulder anxiously. "What's wrong?"

"Just cold."

"Hell yeah..." The temperature had indeed dropped several degrees. In fact, the wispy beginnings of a fog were making themselves known between the trees.

"Are we really gonna be here until morning?" Withdrawing her hand from his, she drew herself up. The moon was hidden from view. It was close to impossible to tell where they were. In the dark, the only other colour was the dull grey of the smoky mist clouding the vague route they had taken.

"It won't be so bad once you get used to sleeping outdoors." Tasuki was beginning to shrug off his coat when Lolita stopped him.

"_You're _going to be cold if you do that."

"There's always the tessen." All around them were trees and fresh grass. He sighed. "Maybe not."

"Put it back on."

He shook his head, motioning for her to scoot closer instead. Lolita noticed that he was indicating his lap and narrowed her eyes. "Something tells me somebody's enjoying our predicament a little too much."

"I thought ya were cold."

"So I was. But I'm not falling for your tricks."

Tasuki groaned exasperatedly. "The problem with ya girls is that y' think too much. We're in the freakin' middle of a forest, fer cryin' out loud. Ya'd think I was only trying to keep th' two of us alive!" With that, he tossed the coat over to her and leaned against the thick trunk of a nearby tree. "Fine. If ya distrust me so fuckin' much, ya can keep the damn thing."

Lolita's eyed widened. He had not used so many curses in one dialogue since the early days of their acquaintance. Guilty and shamefaced, she meekly crawled over, jacket held out. "Sorry, Tas."

"Don't call me that," he snapped.

She flinched back. "Sorry."

Amber eyes lazily slunk sideways to look her over. Lolita was still staring at the ground, careful not to sit too close to him, looking so contrite he could not have the heart to remain annoyed. Reaching over, he grabbed the surprised girl and swung his jacket around them. She gasped at the sudden movement that found her deposited in his lap. Tasuki's arms were suddenly around her, pressing her against his chest and into the warm confines of his coat.

"Still cold?" he grumbled.

"N-no." Allowing a tiny smile to flit across her face, she relaxed enough to prop her cheek on his shoulder. The bandit stiffened instinctively. _Just like Chichiri,_ she thought fondly, remembering the way the monk's muscles tensed every time they nudged each other when he was teaching her to ride. But apart from that, everything else was different. Tasuki smelled different. She tried to conjure up an image of Chichiri behind her closed eyes, but another scent pervaded her senses almost intoxicatingly. Unbidden, her face found its way to Tasuki's neck, and he groaned a little.

"Am I too heavy?"

"No," he mumbled, staring up at the snatches of sky between tree branches. "Yer just right." After a pause, he added, "An' it's really okay if ya call me 'Tas'."

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Back at camp, the first clanging and banging of settling down dwindled into a steady buzz of conversation. A group of three or four merchants were clustered together near a pretty big fire, talking and laughing amongst themselves. The elderly silk merchant they had travelled with earlier invited Ami to share his fire, seeing that her companions had not yet returned. He had not been along their present route for very long since, he said, the place used to be overrun with highwaymen.

"But it's safer now, with Imperial guards patrolling the area," he nodded, not wishing to frighten the young lady. "I can't afford danger when I have a wife and several unmarried daughters to take care of."

Ami remained talking with him a while, and then returned to their group's own camp to wait.

Chichiri came in a few minutes later with his catch. "Where are Tasuki and Lolita-chan, no da?" he surveyed the area, skewering the fish into little sticks by the fire.

"Tasuki went for a walk in the woods. Lolita was with him." Ami wondered if she should mention that they had been gone for a while, but at Chichiri's complacent nod, decided not to. Grabbing a stick, she poked at the fire, sending a new shower of sparks raining back on the flames. Chichiri briefly looked up from his work. To him, Ami would've been scowling were it not for the pensive way her brow was creased.

"Ami-chan, no da?"

She dropped the twig, not even noticing that it had already caught fire. "Yes?"

"What are you thinking of, no da?" Chichiri was surprised by the audacious intimacy of his question, and hurried to correct himself when Ami smiled and shook it away.

"Nothing important." Then her grin widened and she cocked a teasing eyebrow. "Why? Have I been acting like a desolate old maid all this while?"

He found himself grinning right back. "Not an old maid, no da. But certainly as desolate, no da."

"I'll be an old maid," she declared. Chichiri thought she was trying to laugh the matter off, but Ami's tone was steady enough to prove the contrary. She reached out to flip a fish over and noticed his puzzled face. "You want to know why, but are either too polite to ask, or too shocked." She had it all figured out. In Chichiri's time, the women practically considered singlehood a curse.

"Both options are plausible, no da."

Instead of answering, Ami drew up her knees and cradled her chin atop them. Light from the fire shadowed her face as she thought. After a while she replied, "I've just had enough of men."

Before Chichiri could stop himself, he asked why.

"You know how they say too much of a good thing is bad?" Catching herself, she laughed nervously. "No, that didn't come out right. It's a pretty long story, really, though the gist of it is that men have previously brought me nothing but trouble. And lots of other things besides men, too." He raised a questioning eyebrow, but this time she shook her head. "You don't want to know. Honest. Please don't ask."

That just about ended the topic. While both were actively racking their brains for a fresh subject, Chichiri suddenly commented about how it would be chilly at night at the same time Ami renewed her anxiety over Lolita and Tasuki.

"They have been gone a while, no da," the monk agreed as he got up to search for them. "They must have lost their way in the woods. Tasuki isn't much of a road map, no da," he smiled wryly. Ami returned it weakly. "Go on and have supper first. I'll be back with them soon. If not, don't wait up for us, no da."

Secretly, Chichiri was thankful for the disappearance that necessitated a walk into the forest. His imprudent question had caused an awkwardness to rise up between them. Though she tried to answer everything he asked, Ami was obviously squirming through it all, and Chichiri did not fare much better listening to her guarded replies. He didn't want her to have to be cautious around him; that was something that never existed since the moment they met each other, and he wanted to retain that kind of open friendship.

To get his mind off of things, he halted in the middle of a collection of trees and focused on locating the chi of his comrades. They were a little too hazy for him to pinpoint their exact location, so he walked on, hoping to get a stronger connection.

The deeper he walked into the woods, the colder it became. He was a little worried by then, and tried reaching out again. Thankfully, he touched against Tasuki's aura somewhere farther off to his left. Without a second thought, he changed course.

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The fish took forever to fry, and Chichiri took another eternity to arrive. Ami managed to save the rest of supper before they charred through, and sat out her vigil. But when the other merchants' voices faded into sleepy silence and her fire was the only one left still roaring lustily, she realized just how tired she was. Deciding to take Chichiri's advice not to wait up for them, she tossed a few more twigs into the campfire, straightened out the bedrolls, and tumbled into her own.

She really didn't know when they arrived. When the first whispers woke her, she judged that it must have been around midnight. But there was too much shifting and walking around for three people to make, and that had her scrambling for the first-aid bag at once, imagining that someone must have gotten hurt. But before she could get out of bed, a large hand clamped against her mouth and she found herself pinned to a similarly huge body.

"Stay quiet an' we won't hurt ya."

Around twenty other men were walking through camp, brandishing rusty iron weapons and torches. Some had reached into the caravans and reappeared with pouches of money. All were remarkably silent and had black scarves wrapped around their faces. Ami watched helplessly as the strangers took whatever they could get their hands on. When they had had enough to load a couple of horses, her captor stood, dragging her with him. Ami suddenly found a knife at her throat.

"You've seen too much."

She thought he would kill her, but he merely continued on his way, glancing over their loot before jerking his head to his men, signalling for them to leave. However, a younger man lingered, trying to pry off a large jade ring from one of the sleeping merchants.

"_I can't afford any dangers..."_

Ami's eyes widened as recognition struck. She tried to scream, but the leader's hand had practically crushed her face enough to allow only the tiniest squeak to get through. The only alternative was to struggle – thrashing, kicking and shoving everywhere she could. The man behind her growled. "Shut up, bitch."

The young bandit was still niggling the ring when the silk merchant finally stirred. At first the elderly man looked like he was going to fight back, but his opponent was younger and stronger. One sharp slap was enough to subdue him. The next time Ami looked, the bandit was raising his weapon, ready to strike. Once again she tried to scream a warning, only to have it interrupted by a sharp blow to the gut. One moment, the world was reeling the wrong way, and the next, she was crumpled over, out cold.

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Numb limbs weren't exactly the best wake-up call. Especially not in the middle of the night. Yawning, Tasuki lifted his face from the mass of hair he had been pillowing for the last hour, puzzled as to its very existence. His arms were wound around another nicely warmed human body, and he looked down, suddenly remembering Lolita. Despite the cold, she had fallen asleep, cuddled against him like it was the most natural thing in the world. He sighed contentedly.

A rustle in the forest answered.

Instantly, he was wide-awake, feeling around for signs of danger. A hazy figure appeared through the trees in the distance, striding closer and closer very fast. He shifted Lolita off himself and was trying to coax the feeling back into his legs for a possible fight when the figure called out, "Tasuki, no da!"

He sighed in relief and turned to shake his stirring companion awake. "Lo, Chiri's here!"

She was quickly up and scrambling down the incline to intercept the silhouette. Moments later, the monk emerged through the trees. "I've been looking all over for you two, no da!"

"Lo here got us lost," the bandit loped over, ruffling her hair as he accepted his coat back.

"You were the one who insisted we walk down here," she retorted.

"At least now y' won't haf'ta go back tuh' camp with yer clothes all wrong."

Chichiri raised his eyebrows in puzzlement, but merely led the way back. It was mostly a silent walk with a few giggles erupting from Tasuki and Lolita between whispers and playful nudges. The forest was still dark, making it more difficult than usual to navigate through unfamiliar woods. Chichiri kept glancing at the sky, and each time, his frown only deepened.

Tasuki noticed his friend's preoccupation. "Oi, Chiri. We're not lost again, are we?"

"No, no da."

"Then why do ya keep lookin' up?"

"I want to make sure –" Suddenly he froze, arm held out to stay his friends. Tasuki instantly shoved Lolita between them and backed the monk, scanning the depths of the forest. The only sounds came from a rare owl. There wasn't even the slightest whisper of wind to rustle the trees.

"Nothin' `ere."

"They're back at camp, no da." Chichiri broke into a run, tearing through the foliage with the other two at his heels. The ground was uneven and once or twice, an unlucky stumble slowed him down. Tasuki was swearing under his breath, tessen already in his hands. Dry leaves crackled under their feet, and twigs snapped in their faces. Lolita hadn't the slightest idea what was going on, but she could tell by the tight strain in Chichiri's voice and by Tasuki's blatant language that it wasn't anything very good. Keeping up with them was difficult enough, but at last the trees opened up before them, and they burst into camp.

Everything was in order. Relatively. Chichiri and Tasuki scanned the slumbering merchants warily, the former saying something about how he was so sure he felt something.

"I did, too," Tasuki muttered, sweeping sharp eyes over the line of trailers and horses. Nothing seemed out of place... Then Lolita gasped and squeezed past him. She would have run right over to their blazing campfire if he didn't hold her back. "Stay here. It's dangerous until we figure out what exactly is wrong."

"I'll tell you what's wrong!" She burst out, wrenching her wrist from his grasp. "Ami's gone! I can't believe you guys didn't even notice!" True enough, their camp was the epitome of calm, except for one slept-in bedroll. Blankets were everywhere. It looked as though a struggle had taken place. Their horses were thankfully still where they were hitched although all the saddlebags had disappeared. Chichiri had a grim expression on his face as he knelt to examine the bedroll.

No blood.

"They didn't hurt her," he squinted towards the forest spreading out on the other side. "But we're not sure that's not going to happen."

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**A/N: A note for the clothes worn inside out. That's a little superstition the folks in my country believe in. They say that whenever you get lost in a forest, just take your clothes off and put them back on inside out and you'll miraculously find yourself back to civilization. I've never actually gotten lost in any forest before, so I wouldn't know.**

**I'm sorry if this chapter was boring. It was kinda hard to focus on it because I kept getting plot/fluff bunnies for succeeding chapters. The foreshadowing is really making me impatient. But teeheehee, I am getting started on fluff, and for the record, I'm really enjoying writing it!**

**To anybody who's still following this story, thank you for your support. I am honestly beginning to lose patience (and interest) with this piece, especially when I don't get enough feedback. ...Though, come to think about it, that's not the appropriate thing to say... :) So please, if you're still interested in seeing this through, please leave a review.**

Oh, to InkedButterfly: Yes, Lolita is her real name. I know some people aren't too comfortable with the implications tagged behind that name, but I like it. * shrug*


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8: ...Or Is It Because I'm Learning to Love You?

Cold floor. Drafty interior. Ash-laden smoke. Aching muscles. Chafed wrists. Bruised body.

It was all Ami could do to convince herself not to open her eyes. But in the end, inquisitiveness prevailed, and she realized she couldn't take just hearing and not seeing any longer. Shifting herself to a more comfortable position, she stretched her legs. Ankles tied. Wow. At least she was propped up against a wall.

Alcohol-stumped bodies littered the dilapidated hall. Cracks ran across the ceiling and the lacquered paint was fading into chipped bits of colour. Among the men, the few early risers sorted out last night's find, pulling out bolts of brocade, bags of gems, and stores of food from sacks parked all over the long room. Whatever was worth trading was carefully tucked back away, while anything less fragile was simply dumped onto the floor. One of them was doing just that when a familiar backpack tumbled to the floor.

Ami whined.

"Shut up," the bandit automatically growled, not even sparing a look at her as he emptied the contents of the bag and frowned over them.

Instead of stopping, however, she kicked out, pounding her feet against the floor.

The man finally glared at her. "I said shut up."

What should have been a defiant "NO!" came out as a long, stifled cry. Staring at her long and hard, understanding dawned in his face. He held up the bag.

"This yours, nee-chan?"

She shook her head.

"Whose is it then?"

A shrug.

"I see." Amused, he ambled over and yanked down her gag. "Okay, whose is it?"

"Don't touch it. It's my friend's."

At that, the bandit grinned hugely and caught up her chin. "Yer friend must be mighty pretty, huh?"

Her eyes narrowed as his meaning sank in. "My _guy_ friend's."

Releasing her, he walked back to sift through the mess of foreign things and found a mirror "I s'pose men go around bringing mirrors with them?"

"Some men are particularly vain," she retorted.

The bandit merely snorted at her comment. When he found a tube of lipgloss and a bottle of cologne, Ami withered. There was no way out now. "`A take it that yer _friend_ is excessively careful of his appearance?"

"Yes," came the dejected mumble and rolled eyes. Were Lolita in her place, Ami could guess exactly what the other girl would do. Probably something thoughtless enough to get her out of her bonds and straight into trouble.

The bandit's grin widened. Getting up, he clapped his hands loudly, eliciting inebriated protests in the general direction of his subordinates. "We missed a valuable thing last night men!" The force of his voice positively shook the crumbling walls. Throwing Ami a malicious smirk, "The little lady 'ere would like somebody to keep 'er company till we've sold 'em."

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Morning came with a pounding headache.

A thorough check revealed that bandits had most obviously struck the previous night. Goods and money were stolen, of course, but more distressing was the fact that Ami and the silk merchant were gone, too. Chichiri had ridden hard in hope of tracking the thieves, but the most he could do was return with a handful of Konan guards who had finished patrolling the area just before the mishap. Even then, the guards were not helpful beyond the promise of escorting the merchants to the next village and of sending scouts to sniff for the hideout. In the end, the Suzaku group decided to rush to the closest settlement for information and provisions.

That was when Chichiri's headache intensified. When he and Tasuki concluded that selling one of their horses would be the most practical thing to do, they hadn't counted on nobody wanting to buy the said horse, with all its sleek, imperial perfection and fancy trappings. Even when he was desperate enough to suggest trade, nobody would take the animal.

Tasuki was having no better luck. Assigned to gather as much information as he could on the bandits, he headed straight towards the tavern, Lolita in tow. She wasn't too happy about his "ingenious" plan, but was eventually persuaded to accept it. Now, in a dusty old bar, she waited for him to finish talking to the bartender.

"Looks like a nice, peaceful town," the seishi remarked, making her want to roll her eyes with impatience. Some bandits were out large with Ami and the silk merchant, and after what the Konan guards told them about dirt-poor, starving revolutionaries stalking the area, she dreaded thinking of what those men would not do to get their way.

"...no problems around here, like bandits?..."

"...woods are a very good hiding place, though nothing like the mountains..."

She tapped a random tune on the counter. Maybe the bandits-or-probably-revolutionaries would resort to asking for ransom. But Chichiri was already having one hell of a time trying to raise meagre funds, so obviously, they would not be able to afford paying ransom. The most probable outcome was the kidnappers selling their captives into slavery, just like they probably sold all the stolen goods on the Konan black market.

Ignoring Lolita's glazed look of speculation, Tasuki persisted in his interrogation.

"...any case of kidnapping?"

"...ever saved the victims?"

"...hideout...?"

The bartender fell strangely silent, shot glass frozen in the folds of the dishcloth.

He had struck home. The bandit eyed the man as nonchalantly as he could. Beside him, Lolita paused her finger band to listen to them.

One minute passed. Two...

The bartender coughed, then returned to his task as if nothing unusual had happened. "I am sorry, but nobody has ever tracked the victims down. Their families have never seen them again." Without skipping a beat, he caught Lolita's eye and nodded towards a zither in the corner. "I was looking at the way you sounded out that melody and wondered if you knew how to play the guzheng, nee-san?"

Lolita started. Tasuki narrowed his eyes at the bartender's back.

"I, uh, tried it a few times – "

"Perfect," the older man nodded amiably. "I heard you travellers were robbed and are looking for money. If you want to play here tonight, I'm willing to pay you."

Tasuki twitched in his seat. News sure travelled fast in a small town. Slipping a hand under the counter, he grabbed Lolita's arm and jerked towards the door.

"So how about it?"

Before Tasuki could shake his head, she thanked the bartender with a big smile. "I'll keep it in mind!" and hopping off her seat, dragged a frowning bandit out behind her.

As soon as they were gone, the older man disappeared into a basement door beside the counter. Another man was waiting for him at the top of the stairs. Except for the outstretched hand holding a brown paper packet, the latter was completely hidden in the shadows.

"That's the girl we want."

Pale, the bartender tucked the parcel into his trousers pocket. "About the payment..."

A deadly silver glint suddenly flashed out from the darkness. The second man's voice had gone down a few notches to become a menacing snarl. "You know what happens if you don't finish the job..."

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"The place has been booked, fellas!"

Ami chest tightened at the laughter in the bandit leader's voice. As soon as the man reappeared in the room, he had strode over to her and made the proclamation. Presently, he leered with a mix of amusement and regret. She stared right back.

The leader crouched to her level. Sweeping critical eyes over her he mused, "How much d'ya think y'll fetch, my dear?"

"Depends on where you'll sell me," Ami bit back through clenched teeth.

The bandit feigned astonishment. "Now, now, for someone about to be sold into slavery, y' don't seem too concerned."

She shrugged detachedly. "I'm not."

"Really." Salacious intent replaced surprise. "Then maybe y' should just stay here with us. I'm sure we'll value y' more than any whore-hunting bastard will. Not too many ladies wander in our parts, y' know. Foreign ones from other worlds are especially rare," he hissed into her ear.

"I guess I'll make you rich, then."

He chuckled, a disturbing sound that made the hairs at the back of her neck stand right up. "Not just you. Yer lil' friend will no doubt earn me some, too."

At once, her carefully nurtured air of indifference smashed to admit a surge of hope. Only moments ago, the bandits were talking about sending poison to somebody in town. She didn't need to hear the details to know for who it was. "I thought you wanted to kill Lolita!" Ami bit her tongue, wishing it would just rip right off and stop making her blurt things out.

Hot breath tickled her neck as the leader quietly laughed. As if catching her thoughts he whispered, "I don't care about her name. But I sure as hell am not going to kill a prize like that. We just need a little bribe for her guardians to come prancing right in begging for help. My man has seen 'er..." He pulled away, and their eyes met. What Ami saw there made her feel very strongly for her new friend. "He suggested that maybe we keep her for ourselves."

"And...and are you going to act on that?" Her voice shook when she next spoke.

Her question went unanswered. Dragging her up, the bandit leader untied the rope around her ankles and pushed her towards a small door near the end of the room. Another man was waiting, and he exchanged self-satisfied smirks with his boss as he undid the knots on her wrists.

"Clean yerself up." The door turned out to be the entrance to a crude bathroom. "I promised th' bastards a pretty woman, and a pretty woman they're gonna get." Heavy hands shoved her in, and the door slammed shut before Ami could react.

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Their protests managed to penetrate the music blaring right into her ears. Exasperated, Lolita yanked off the earpieces of her iPod to stare at the two seishi. At her look, both men immediately stopped talking.

"I'm trying to work," she said with veiled calmness, holding up sheaves of paper dotted with notes.

That was the wrong thing to say. Chichiri's face immediately wrinkled into the same distraught expression he had been wearing for the past thirty minutes, and Tasuki's verbal fireworks resumed.

"Ya won't go th' tavern tonight! I don't like it an' I won't let you!"

"He's right, no da. Lolita-chan, this place doesn't feel right. It could be dangerous, no da!"

"Don't be so pig-headed and listen fer once!"

Stuffing the iPod back into her jeans pocket, Lolita clasped her hands on her knees and looked at the Suzaku seishi expectantly. "Okay. So any more great ideas?" She tried to hide the sarcasm in her voice, but it leaked out.

The monk winced. "No, no da."

They had spent roughly the entire day trying to get information and provisions, none of which endeavours were fruitful. Tasuki's scowl spoke for itself, while Chichiri returned with the same old horse. Truth be told, by the end of the day, only the horse looked satisfied.

"Tasuki?"

"No," he grumbled.

"So the only alternative is to accept the bartender's job offer."

"NO (no da)!"

Lolita sighed. "Look you guys, there's no other alternative. If we want to keep going, we're going to need fresh supplies. Let me help. Please?"

She begged and begged.

Chichiri was the first to break down. He did it reluctantly, procrastinating and sighing and shaking his head and looking at her sternly hoping she would change her mind. Lolita just stared at him pleadingly. Now that he thought about it, maybe it was harmless. Glancing at Tasuki, who had stubbornly crossed his arms across his chest and was having a one-sided glaring contest with the girl, he nodded.

"All right, no da. But Tasuki and I will be there the whole time."

"Yes!" She looked so triumphant Chichiri thought she would start throwing her papers into the air like confetti. "Deal! Can I go over now?"

"What for?" the bandit protested, grimacing at her closely written scribbles. "And how are you supposed to play with so many blots on your page?"

"I have to practice," she replied, taking him by the elbow. "And those blots happen to be the chords I'm supposed to be studying. Coming Chichiri?"

Watching Lolita drag his friend away, the monk shook his head. "I will look for information about the bandits, no da. But I will drop by later on."

"Be sure ya come on time!" Tasuki bellowed. "`Cause if Lo's playing is so terrible, I don't know if I'll be able to keep the angry crowds at bay!"

"I will mesmerize you," she promised sarcastically, batting his arm. "Bye' Chichiri!"

He watched them enter the tavern before he headed outside town. The merchants' trail swept right past the entrance to the village like a ribbon connecting it to the rest of civilization. There was nothing but wilderness across the trail. The forest started out sparse and thin, then built up into a dense, ancient woods. Beyond the first few metres, Chichiri could make out nothing except stout trunks and twisted branches heavy with foliage. Indeed, if bandits roamed the area, they should have built a hideout somewhere between those leafy screens.

He tried to examine the ground for signs of recent travel, but whatever grass flattened by retreating men had already sprung back up. There was almost nothing he could go on. Except...

Chiding himself for not thinking of it earlier, Chichiri teleported himself up into the topmost branches of the largest tree he could find. From the new vantage point, the once-forbidding acres were suddenly spread out like a map. Unfortunately, all he could see were tufts of trees covering the land in every shade of green. Everywhere he turned, the same sight greeted his eyes. Green to the left, green to the right. Green...

He paused to sniff the air. Smoke. Afraid that there was a large fire in the village, he twisted south in its direction. That was when he saw it: the first wisps of smoke curling up from something somewhere in the north. He was about to dismiss it as chimney smoke from a neighbouring village when he realized that it came from within the trees. After a minute, the soft, dirty white tendrils accumulated into a larger puff of darker smoke.

Forest fire? No, it was too little...

Chichiri did not dare confirm what he was thinking as he scrambled down the tree. Concentrating on getting to the source of the smoke, he ran blindly through the trees, stepping over large roots and brushing twigs out of the way. Pretty soon the air grew warmer, and the choking smell of burning wood wafted heavily from up ahead. A huge fire crackled, and with it mingled the sounds of men's laughter.

The seishi stiffened as he sent a wall of chi before him and found several unrestrained auras. Flashes of orange flame shot out from the thinning trees farther ahead. The smoke stung his eyes. Keeping low and out of the thickening smoke, Chichiri crept towards the gathering. When he was close enough to hear snatches of their garbled conversation, he dared a peek.

Five or six men were building a large bonfire and talking about what a great party they were going to have after the first bitch was sold that night, and how it would get better and better every night after that. When the topic veered into details he didn't want to hear, Chichiri stopped listening and surveyed the area instead. The clearing looked like some kind of old courtyard. Wild grass grew between cracks on the cobblestone tiles, which stretched out for a few square metres before ending like a driveway in front of a similarly decrepit two-storey building. A couple of rough-looking men hung around the entrance, polishing old swords and swigging jugs of sake.

The hideout.

He inched back into to return to alert his companions when, unexpectedly, a scream tore through the woods.

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Ami knew she was alone the minute the door closed behind her. As alone as she could get with a horde of men probably waiting for a free show, anyway. The point was, she was technically left to herself. Left to her resources. Left to her thoughts. She never actually thought that time would come. Experimentally flexing her wrists, she found that they worked just as well as before despite the soreness and the bits of torn skin.

That was a start.

She found water, splashed some on her face, and tossed the remainder onto the floor just as if she were bathing. Hushed talking rumbled from the other side of the door. She rolled her eyes.

Men.

The bathroom was tiny, having only enough space to hold a soaking tub and an open floor to bathe. Towels lay in a crumpled heap in another corner, while various articles of men's clothing hung from lines strung from one wall to another. Carefully picking up her skirts, Ami dumped some more water on the floor and tiptoed to the tub. The only other exit was a window above the said tub. It looked kind of small, but the frame was crumbling apart and there were no shutters. She might fit.

Discarding the bucket, she clambered up the sides of the tub. It was easier said than done, for the bath was really nothing more than an ironbound square barrel made of brittle wooden planks. One wrong step and she could spend the rest of her life picking splinters from her legs. Very, very carefully, Ami climbed up, grabbing onto the window frame for support the moment she could trust herself to keep the precarious balance. When she stood to her full height, the low casement came down to her neck, just high enough for her to push herself up and shimmy out into the world beyond.

"Oi, nee-chan! Are ya done yet?" The bandit leader pounded at the door.

Ami hissed as a start nearly sent her into the brimming tub. Gripping the dusty window more firmly, she called out, "Not yet!"

"Ya better hurry up! Some o' th' men are gettin' impatient!" he laughingly yelled back.

_Of course they would be,_ she thought dryly. Bracing herself, she heaved herself up. The upper half of her body slid right through the opening, with room to spare. She was calculating the distance to the ground and the amount of pain it would necessitate when a bandit suddenly strolled out from a corner of the hideout. She was hard to miss.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" he demanded, racing over. "Get back inside!"

"I wish I could," she muttered, and meant it. Getting onto the tub was hard enough, but it was even harder to stand back on it after deliberately pushing herself off it for the option of hanging halfway out a gaping window.

"You're trying to run!" The young man's eyes widened with belated understanding. "Boss!"

"Quiet!" Ami whispered loudly.

"You're not going to get away on my watch!" He backed away from her, still shouting for his boss. The men on the other side of the bathroom door had stopped their indirect voyeurism to change into a jumble of shouted orders and scrambling. Sooner or later, they were going to barge in and find out what she was up to. Ami knew that being yanked back into the bandit hold would be infinitely more painful than landing on her face on the grass outside. Sucking in what could be her last lungful of air, she shut her eyes and pushed against the outer wall, propelling herself forward into thin air.

Fear stopped her body clock for one second. The next, she found herself sprawled on the ground, probably bruised in a hundred other places she never before knew existed. Immediately following her brief flight, the watchman high-tailed back to his comrades, screaming about suicidal prisoners. That at least, bought her some time to catch her breath. It wasn't a very long time though, as footsteps thundered from either side of her. Making sure nothing was broken, she picked herself up and ducked under the cover of the trees ahead.

"I see her! She's running away!"

The voices, once far, were suddenly gaining. Ami ran desperately, but not fast enough for brambles to catch in her long skirt. More than once, she collected additional scrapes tripping on prehistoric roots.

Sounds of impending threat fuelled the adrenalin already pumping in her veins. She glanced upwards. The sky was still a bright orange, but night was already descending into the forest. While it shrouded her from the men, it also obscured the way, and Ami found herself falling more often than she was running.

She was tiring too, breathing in sharp little gasps rather than in long, drawn inhalations. Her lungs burned with the need for oxygen, and her limbs began to ache from exhaustion. Then just as she thought she was going to give, the trees thinned out, letting little spots of orange light into the leafy darkness. The forest floor suddenly glimmered a fiery gold.

_Like the fires of hell, _ her mind blurted out before she knew what it was thinking. Yet she kept on, because at the moment, the 'fires of hell' were a great deal kinder than the bandits-turned-slave-traders. Sometime during the race her shoes had come off and she had to sprint barefoot, the ground a living warmth under her exposed feet. It was a comfort, that warmth.

Dry leaves rusted as she ran towards the light, certain of salvation. There had to be a village on the other side. There had to be – would be – people who would come to her aid. The others would be there – Lolita and her haphazard bravado, Tasuki and his similar impulse, and Chichiri with his reassuring presence. He would be there, the expression showing relief at her escape at the same time vowing punishment for her captors. She could almost see his face...

The daydreams kept her from noticing at first, but it only took split seconds for reality to hit. When it did, that light airy feeling she had falling out the window came rushing in. It was a beautiful high keeping her afloat, away from the painful truth of the ground crumbling right under her, dropping her down a jagged precipice. But the tranquility couldn't last long enough.

When the initial terrified scream had faded into a distant echo, she was already hurtling down at breakneck speed and enjoying the ride. It was as if her body had stopped caring and had resigned itself to whatever fate had in store. Stones cut into flesh so many times the pain numbed itself after a while, and the relentless jarring ceased to bother her. Then, just as she was convincing herself that nothing really mattered anymore, a sharp pain blew up the side of her head. Hot blood tricked down her cheek as she lay listlessly, struggling between consciousness and oblivion. The last things Ami saw were spots of green that must have been grass. The last things she heard were men's voices booming into her pained mind through an incalculable distance.

"That's it. She's dead. No one's gonna survive that fall."

"So what now, boss?"

"What now?" The footsteps retreated back into the forest. "We get th' other one and sell 'er b'fore she can kill 'erself."

Then the world spun black.

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Tasuki was growing agitated. Chichiri was never late. Maybe once, but surely, he would come on time now? The tavern was slowly filling with people – people who wanted one quick drink and then stayed when they saw the new performer testing her instrument. The bartender was calmly serving his customers drinks, and a waitress wove amongst the tables, taking orders.

Stuffed in her corner, Lolita was nowhere near composure herself. The new instrument was a tad different from the piano she was used to, and even after all the transposition, she wasn't sure she could make it work. To top it off, she hadn't expected so many people to turn up. When her fingers were visibly trembling with nerves, she got up and strode to Tasuki.

"I'm going to mess up," she moaned, kneeling down to clutch his arm in supplication. "I've never done a stupid Mozart on a stupid foreign instrument I've touched only so many times I can count them on my fingers the transposition is going to be all wrong I'll make a total fool of myself so many are watching like it's some damned philharmonic concert. Can I have your drink?"

"You can have this," a sweet voice interrupted. Lolita looked up to see the waitress sympathetically smiling down at her. "Nervous?"

"Yes." She accepted the glass and quickly swallowed the contents.

"You'll do fine," the other reassured, and then hurried to the next customer with a tiny wave.

Lolita turned to Tasuki. "Do you think she's right?"

He offered a lopsided smirk. "Who said I was goin' tuh be mesmerized?"

"Right." Taking a deep breath, she stood up. "Right. You are _so_ going to be beyond mesmerized." With that, she made for her instrument and sat down. With a clearer head, she saw that nobody was really paying any attention to her except Tasuki. Lolita relaxed. She would just pretend she was alone in her practice room at home. No one listening, no one waiting to comment on her performance, no one pressuring her to play perfectly to show off to friends...

Hesitant fingers hung suspended in the air for only a moment, during which Tasuki had a fleeting vision of her bailing out. But the moment was gone as quickly as it flashed by, and the next thing he knew, those same fingers, shaking only seconds ago, were suddenly all over the place, creating music the likes of which he had never heard before. The patrons stopped talking to listen, and a hushed silence fell over the place. Notes rippled out of the instrument, overflowing, running into each other; one brisk bar pouring into a slow and teasing lullaby. The melody circled itself, going round and round; pausing but never catching up. From her hands, Tasuki's eyes travelled to Lolita's face, and he gaped in awe.

Maybe he expected to see the same intense look as the music she made, but her face was calm. She looked like a child playing with her favourite toy and getting too caught up in her own fantasy world to notice anything else. There was only one way he could describe what he saw there. Peace, pure and simple.

When the final strains stopped vibrating, Lolita dared look up. Everyone was staring at her with surprised looks. From the back of the crowd, applause began to ring out. Then somebody shouted for another song, which was loudly seconded. She peeked at Tasuki. The bandit was grinning widely.

Flushing in pleasure, Lolita turned to her instrument again. Unbidden, a new piece floated out of her fingers. She had performed it for her mother's friends once before, and though she wasn't too crazy about the company, she did love the composition. Plus, the soothing calm would complement the first piece's rushed ecstasy.

Easy and controlled. That was what the song was all about. It was a juxtaposition of contraries – both passionate and reserved, urging and sheltering, hot and cold, confused and...pained. Lolita blinked against the rising heat from somewhere in the depths of her body. As soon as it came, it was completely doused by a chilling coldness. Then the pounding began in the back of her head, at first in time to the music, and then not, shredding her concentration into a million little pieces. She struggled to focus on playing, but it was difficult when she could barely keep track of her hands. They hit several wrong notes, and through the haze of a clouded mind she heard confused murmurs. Any other time, Lolita would have caught herself and backtracked, but her body was strangely intent on flouting her. Mumbling an apology, she stood up and stumbled to Tasuki, nearly tripping over her own feet in the process.

Strong arms suddenly propped her up, and belatedly, she heard the concerned question. It sounded like it was spoken underwater. The rushing in her ears grew stronger, and the tiny demon drummed away at the back of her head. Lolita gasped, trying to explain what was wrong when she looked up, saw Tasuki's blurred face, and swooned dead away.

"Lo!" He lay her on the floor, calling out for help. "What's the matter?" All talking in the room escalated into a panicked level. Chairs scraped back, and several pairs of feet scrambled towards the door. Steel whistled against steel. Tasuki looked up to see several of the patrons closing in on them, weapons drawn.

"Poison," one thickly muscled man smirked. "Hand 'er over and we'll give 'er th' antidote."

The flame-haired bandit crushed Lolita into his arms, eyes molten as he sized up his opponents. "No fuckin' way."

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**A/N: Now we're getting somewhere. I had had enough of the introspection of the previous chapter and decided it was time to speed things up a bit. It's still not as fast as I would have liked (courtesy of my compulsion to explain everything and iron out every single detail, not to mention VERY wordy habits), but I will try to push the pedal in the next chapters. Can't wait to write the fluff! Art classes are coming to an end for me, so fic-writing will probably be my single solace from now on. (I am SERIOUSLY in need of a life.)**

**If you think it's worth the time, please review. Mata ne, minna-san! XD**


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9: Accidents Can Strengthen Bonds

The little hut in the woods was so out of the way visitors rarely came by, if any. It was surrounded by lush greenery, located in the heart of the wilderness. Only two people lived in that house – a woodsman and his wife.

Untoward incidents rarely occurred in the forest, for the townsmen were wise enough to keep away at night. Attacks from wild animals were virtually unheard of, violent killings practically non-existent. But it wasn't that way when the woodcutter arrived home to the familiar sight of his wife stirring something at the stove. He fumbled and checked himself over until his wife had to ask whether there was anything wrong. He told her he dropped his water skin and would go find it. Outside, the distant howl of a wolf rippled into the growing dark. The wife told him to forget about it and served him his dinner.

For the rest of the evening, the woodcutter's movements were abrupt and jerky, and his eyes kept darting back and forth on the table.

"I have to go back," he finally said, laying down his chopsticks.

It wasn't just about the water skin, now, the wife was sure. Bustling up, she reached for a piece of wood and dipped it into the fireplace. "The wolves are prowling. You should be careful."

His reply was a silent nod as he took the torch and strode out.

Fifty or so years of walking through the same woods came in handy in the dark. The fire was barely needed as the man tramped through the brush, knowing exactly where he was going. The wolf howled again and he paused to listen. It had come from somewhere not too far away. By the utter silence in the area, it could mean the pack was stalking prey. He walked faster, crashing through low foliage. The wolves were taking an unnaturally long time to pounce. If they were bent on capturing a small animal, he should have heard the rush of attack and the dying squeal by now. But except for his footsteps, everything was still and quiet.

The torch parted a glowing way through the trees. A heavy chill skittered down his spine. He had not felt it in a while, the last being when he stumbled upon a dead hunter.

Heavy breath now mingled with the noise of his feet. To survive in the wild, one had to learn to trust gut feeling. That was the mantra that kept him alive thus far. Now, his gut feeling was telling him something was very wrong.

Then he heard it. The quick tackles were too quiet for any normal person to hear. Common sense urged the woodsman to brush it off as his imagination, but his senses were far too heightened to permit it. An excited mind told him the rustle came from wolves closing in on their catch. Paws fell in rhythmic thumps on the dewy forest floor, and the next instant, the familiar throaty growl echoed in the air. Chest heaving, he waited for the dying cry, certain that he was too late.

It never came. In its stead was a flare of red shooting up into the empty darkness above. Frenzied snarls grew louder, and the bestial attacks forgot to be discreet. Wolves charged into their superhuman foe, rushing only to be repelled by the solid red light. Finally, the growling died away into vanquished whimpers, and the woodsman once again found himself running towards the source of the strange glow.

He saw the body at once – dashed against a large boulder. Beside it, the barrier was just retreating back into the palm of a young man.

"Is there a doctor close by?" Anxiety lined his comical face.

The woodsman approached slowly, peering at the body out of the corner of his eyes. It belonged to a girl, and was thankfully not as disfigured as he thought it would be. "I'm not sure – " he was about to tell the young man that the girl might be in more need of an undertaker than a doctor when he caught the weak rise and fall of her chest.

"I found Ami-chan here not too long ago," the blue-haired man's face was strained as he cradled his fragile bundle. "She must have fallen from the top of the cliff. Please, where is the closest doctor?"

"My wife can take care of her while I go and fetch one." Giving the strange pair another once-over, the woodsman led the way back into the gloom from whence he had emerged.

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Holy fire came on the menu for the first few idiots.

Fighting was more difficult when one was protecting a fallen comrade, but Tasuki didn't mind the extra strain. As he waded through the sea of scrambling men, only two things reigned: anger at the threat made on Lolita's life, and the fear of her dying before he could finish fighting. His opponents were stronger than he had expected – weathered thugs who probably duelled to death for fun – and they were determined to get the girl.

"We ain't got ransom, so leave 'er alone!" He was clearly outnumbered, but the rage firing his veins was more than enough to keep him going. One elbow smashed into a man's nose, while a wide sweep of his gleaming fan shot another into physical hell.

"Dealers pay more than we can earn asking for ransom!" The sneering reply came clear through the din, and Tasuki lunged at one of the men making a grab for the girl. Dragging him up by the collar, the bandit wasted no time driving his fist into the other's face.

"Fuck off!" he snarled, whirling around to face the others. Most of the men were already down, thanks to the front-liners who very conveniently spread the fire around. Unfortunately, the embers from the burning men caught onto the wooden structure. The tavern was going to go down in flames very soon.

Eyes darting to Lolita, his chest momentarily clenched in an overwhelming surge of the dominant emotions. "Where's the antidote!"

The man who started the whole mess staggered up, casually licking blood off the side of his mouth. A monster of a man, he towered well over Tasuki, his arms like posts as he swaggered towards his counterpart, eyes never leaving the girl on the floor.

"The antidote is in the stronghold."

The seishi glared, moving to shield Lolita from the other's malicious glance.

"You're gonna haf'ta give `er to us if ya want 'er to live."

Tasuki snorted. It had suddenly dawned on him that while he might not be able to tell what poison the slave traders used, he had seen the after-effects of enough lethal ones to know that while there weren't convulsions or rasping breaths, the situation couldn't be too critical. He was sure Lolita could hold out a few more minutes.

A slow grin spread across his face. "Ya know, I think I change my mind." The words lingered in the air longer than he did. Surprise barely registered in his opponent's face than Tasuki flashed away, only to reappear behind the man to send a spinning kick to the side of his head. The slave trader reeled in surprise, but managed to retaliate with a swift blow that had Tasuki scrambling to defense.

"Not bad, kid." The ringleader grinned as they fell back to their respective starting positions. The tavern was growing warmer and warmer with the fire, and sweat trickled down the men's faces. Glasses on the counter exploded from the heat one another the other, littering the floor with shards of rainbow colour. Smoke steadily piled up, roiling into the ceiling like low-lying storm clouds.

Tasuki's gaze flickered towards Lolita, who lay inches behind him. For the moment, she would be all right where she was – away from the smoke. But the beams were creaking and a part of the second-storey floor had already crashed in one corner. It wouldn't take long for the rest to follow.

He swore. There he was, slugging it out, thinking it was the best thing to do while the building they were in happily burned to the ground. Upon retrospect, he realized it was a stupid, reckless, ego-tripping move. It hadn't gotten him anywhere closer to the antidote, and he sure as hell was not going to progress towards it after beating the shit out the slave traders' leader. The smart thing to do was run. He didn't like the idea too much, but it was definitely better than waiting to roast alive.

_It's what Chiri would do under the circumstances,_ he thought, forgetting to feel the jealous pang that crept up unbidden. The older seishi was a model of sensibility; since he hadn't gotten anybody killed or dangerously injured yet, he must have been doing something right.

"Damn, I hate to do this," Tasuki muttered, backing away from his opponent to scoop up Lolita.

"Runnin' away, fang boy?"

"Ya can stay tuh' burn yer sorry ass if ya want to," he retorted. Focusing on escaping rather than on rolling up his sleeves and fighting was easier said than done. Casting a final glare at his opponent, "If anythin' happens to his girl here, I will personally hunt ya down and kill ya in th' most painful way possible." Then, hitching Lolita higher up his arms, he left the ringleader in a rush of air and a burning tavern full of the latter's fallen men.

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Chichiri looked the epitome of calm while he sat at the woodsman's kitchen table.

In the past few hours, the panic of searching for Ami had escalated into an almost unbearable tension. He had scoured the woods, expanded his chi – all to no avail. He couldn't find her, and the dread had begun to be painful. Night was descending fast. After hearing the scream, he feared he wouldn't find her until daybreak. Anxiety clouded his focus, and it wasn't until he regained that – a difficult process that felt longer than usual – that he found her.

Finding her wasn't all too much better. He had sensed her life force near the bandits' hold, clear on the other side of the area he was searching. The usual warmth was barely pulsing, slipping away as he fought to pinpoint its exact location. Cursing himself, Chichiri teleported back to the vicinity of the hideout. There, the aura was clearer, and he arrived at the bottom of the crag in time to keep the waiting pack of wolves from devouring her.

A shiver rippled through him and he flinched. He didn't like thinking about what could have happened were he a second too late, but the scene kept pushing until his mind was wrapped with nothing except that horrific possibility. Seeing her as he did – bleeding and white as death – already shook him with a dozen regrets. Regrets like how he shouldn't have left her that night; how he should have just trusted Tasuki to take care of Lolita and not worried over them too much. He had left Ami vulnerable, and the next time he saw her she was –

"You should eat."

The solicitous voice rocked him from his troubled thoughts, and Chichiri looked up to see the gentle face of the woodsman's wife. He nodded, but made no attempt towards the bowl of food and the pair of chopsticks neatly laid out beside it.

After a stretched silence, Chichiri felt he should say something; thank them. After all, the woodsman had indeed found a doctor.

"Thank you for helping us, no da."

The wife shook her head. "It is a small thing to do for the ones who saved our country from destruction." Chichiri's head snapped up in surprise. Apparently, the story of the Suzaku no miko had spread even into the heart of the forest. Looking at the closed door behind which the doctor disappeared over an hour ago, the woman sighed. "I hope she's all right."

"So do I, no da."

From his place, the woodsman asked, "Do you think she was running away from somebody?"

Chichiri nodded wearily. "Ami-chan disappeared last night, no da. The Konan guards told us that maybe the revolutionaries took her. When I went to look for her this afternoon, I saw a sort of stronghold. The men were referring to selling somebody into the slave trade, no da. And as I was leaving, I heard her scream." In a smaller, frustrated voice he added, " But it took me so long to find her."

"It is true that revolutionaries roam the area," the elderly man agreed. "Even with the Konan guard, they have managed to terrorize the villagers into obedience. But recently, men have been defecting from their cause, and the remaining members have turned to robbing to survive. They are afraid of discovery by the patrollers and only resort to kidnapping when there are witnesses to their crimes." As he said this, the woodsman's eyes travelled back and forth between the closed door and Chichiri's face. "Now that they are dabbling into the slave trade, do you think they would come back for your companion?"

His question went unanswered as the doctor chose that moment to interrupt. Chichiri instantly stood, but the high hopes he had been nurturing deflated at the doctor's look. "How is she...no da?"

"Hard to tell," the doctor confessed, softly closing the door behind him. His hands were reddened with blood, and his expression was tight. "I was able to stitch the wound closed, but the head injury is serious. If the internal bleeding continues, she might never wake up again. I will be back tomorrow, and we will do everything we can for her." He looked at each of them in turn, bowed, and left.

Chichiri did not wait to excuse himself to go to Ami's room. He slipped in quietly, momentarily lingering with his back to the door. When he finally talked himself into approaching, guilt nearly overwhelmed him, and he collapsed into the chair at the bedside.

He was supposed to take care of her. She was supposed to be all right. They were supposed to be on their jolly way to Mt. Taikyouku, maybe camping out somewhere for the night. But now one of them was a hair's breadth away from death, and he had no idea how the others were. Not even three days from Eiyou and everything was going downhill.

Elbows on his knees, Chichiri dropped his head and heaved a loud sigh. One of his hands involuntarily wrapped around hers, his thumb gently stroking the scratched flesh. "I'm so sorry, Ami-chan. From now on, I'll always watch over you. Just please wake up."

She didn't even stir.

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With the doctor gone, the aide was having the time of his life. The hardest time of his life. An impromptu fire had suddenly decided to spring up at the only tavern in town. If the owner hadn't come running, he would have been caught off guard by the sudden wave of men who staggered through the doors, leaning against each other's soot-covered clothes.

The clinic was a picture of chaos. Scattered around the waiting room were patients with varying degrees of burns while the closest thing to a doctor tended to the more severely injured ones. Moans replaced talking, and the alarmed shouting as villagers outside rushed to put out the fire did not help the noise level.

"Oi, where is the doctor!"

The newcomer didn't even have to bang his way through the battered door anymore.

Sighing at the new voice, the doctor's aide briefly left a patient to poke his head around the corner into the waiting room. "The doctor's out," he shouted back to the orange-haired man above the pandemonium. "If it's minor burns, please wait your turn. I have an emergency patient here."

But the other man was nowhere near taking orders. Already tired from all the rushing, the apprentice merely flicked a disinterested glance at the girl in the other's arms. "Look, you'll have to wait with the others. She's neither burnt nor asphyxiated, and there are other things I need to look into other than a fainting spell," he retorted acidly.

In reply, a feral growl rumbled from the orange-haired man. The doctor's aide suddenly noticed the end of a metal fan protruding from a holster in his back, but the recognition that dawned was instantly wet-blanketed. His job was to save people, not gawk over national celebrities.

"Just because you're a Suzaku seishi – "

"Shut the hell up!" Tasuki finally exploded. "If y' weren't too busy bein' cocky, ya would'ave seen the poisonin' case right under yer arrogant nose!" Lolita stirred at his shouting, and he gripped her tighter. The apprentice hesitated. "Are ya gonna do anythin' about it!"

Nodding, the younger man motioned him into a spare room before disappearing to gather supplies. He was back faster than either expected, dumping an assortment of tinctures atop the bedside table. The word "posion" worked like a charm. Dropping everything else, the doctor's aide was suddenly everywhere at the same time – leafing through medical references, sorting through herbs, and sniffing bitter solutions. Watching the other rush somewhat abated Tasuki's fears. At least there was somebody who could help them now.

"When did the patient lose consciousness?" The young man had his fingers pressed against the girl's wrist, while the free hand rested on her forehead, checking for fever.

"Just b'fore th' fire started," replied the flame seishi, drawing himself up straighter as the wave of panic threatened to return. But the young man only nodded, and a relieved smile even flitted across his face as he tipped the contents of a vial into Lolita's mouth. She coughed briefly, and then her eyes fluttered open.

"She'll be all right." Patting the covers, the young man gathered his things and returned to the madhouse waiting in the front hall.

Tasuki immediately took over the recently vacated chair. With the closed door blocking the noise outside, it seemed as if the room in the doctor's clinic was all that remained of the whole world. At least, it was that way to him who was washed with relief as Lolita's eyes focused and drank him in.

"Some mutt poisoned ya, an' ya passed out in th' middle o' th' second piece," he informed her, immediately knowing she'd ask. "Yer at the doctor's now. The old man's apprentice gave ya somethin' an' said ya'd be okay."

He thought she'd start crying and asking for Chichiri the way she had every time she was hurt during the past months. What Tasuki didn't expect, however, was the smirk twitching up one side of her mouth. "I must have scared you pretty badly, huh?"

"No kiddin'."

Lolita breathed deeply, wrinkling her nose at the sterile scent. Wriggling under the blankets, she propped herself up on an arm and stared squarely back at Tasuki. "So how much did we get paid?"

His jaw dropped in pure incredulity, and for a moment, all he could do was sputter incoherently.

In response, she raised a delicate eyebrow. "I promised to help get us back on track, and I intend very much to fulfill that promise." When he didn't reply, the questioning look deepened, and Lolita leaned forward to peer into his face. Raw emotion, through bridled, was livid. The intensity of his amber eyes sent an uncomfortable tingle throughout her body. "Tasuki...?"

The wavering query turned into a surprised gasp as a wall of fabric suddenly enveloped her. Lolita's arm slid out from underneath her, and she collapsed back onto the bed, crushed in his tight embrace. "Unfeeling moron," he whispered, voice gruff with worry. The words blazed a flushed trail from her neck into her cheeks, swelling her astonishment into uneasy breathlessness. The hand braced on the back of her neck clutched desperately, and Lolita shut her eyes against the surge of satisfaction. " I was scared you'd die on me."

It felt so wrong to be enjoying another man's reassurances when once upon a time she vowed to belong, body and soul, to only one person. It crossed her mind that at a time like the one now, she should be looking for that blue-haired seishi. Then when she realized that she had to stop and think before wanting Chichiri, her stomach twisted into a tight knot.

All of a sudden, his weight was too much to bear; she couldn't breathe. The knot in her stomach exploded into a colony of angry bees. Lolita didn't know whether she wanted to melt into his grasp or squirm out of it. Either way, just lying there, feeling what she was feeling, seemed like a mortal sin against Chichiri. Confused tears stung at her eyes. Something had to be done.

"Please..." He pulled away enough to allow her to slide her hands between them. She wanted to push him away, but his anguished expression halted the motion. For a full minute they lay pressed together.

Tears tracked a salty stain down her cheeks.

Tasuki reared back in surprise. "What's the matter?" instinctively, he reached out to wipe her eyes, but before they could make contact, she buried her face into the pillow to muffle the rising sobs. His outstretched hand clenched into a fist that fell useless at her side. "It's something I did, isn't it?"

She shook her head.

But he knew better. Fighting the urge to touch her again, Tasuki mumbled an apology and left.

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When he returned late that night, he fully expected Lolita to be asleep. But when he tiptoed into her room, he found the bedside candle still burning. She sat on the edge of the bed, hands clasped on her lap, and for a fleeting moment, Tasuki expected to be scolded for creeping in at the dead of the night. He froze with his back to the door, warily eyeing her as she visually traced his movements. Silence reigned between them, and his heart stammered at the spectral shadows flickering on her face.

He swallowed. "Y-ya look like a ghost." Even to himself, Tasuki thought he sounded terrified.

"Thank you for the observation," she deadpanned. They stared at each other for a long minute, neither moving until Lolita snickered. Suddenly, the rigidity of her posture softened as she succumbed to a giggling fit. Tasuki remained at the door, too stunned to move. "Scaredy cat," she said between chuckles, and patted a spot beside her on the bed, the afternoon's episode completely forgotten. The seishi approached, but did not take her offer.

"What's the big idea?" he grumbled, looking her down his nose. From his vantage point, she looked just like a mischievous child. "Y're not feelin' well. Sick people are s'pposed to be in bed early, not waiting up to poke fun at their caretakers." Her tongue briefly flicked out, creating in him a compulsion to close his mouth over it. He made himself look away, thanking the darkness that shaded his warming face. "Go to sleep. If ya really hafta bother me, wait 'till the mornin'."

"It can't wait." The abrupt gravity of her tone quashed whatever thoughts he had been unsuccessfully trying to suppress, and he snapped around to meet her eyes. She sat tall, and the hands were once again clenched on her thighs. "The doctor came by sometime after you left. He had been to the forest, where he said an old man called him to tend to a girl." Tasuki stiffened, but said nothing. "The old man found her and her companion, a monk, at the edge of the woods some distance away from the back of a bandit hideout."

"Yer not sayin'...?"

She shook her head. "Ami is critical, though. Severe head injury, cracked ribs, a twisted ankle, and superficial lacerations." Her faithful reiteration of the doctor's words made them both cringe. "Even the doctor said he doesn't know if she'll last. We have to go find them, Tasuki."

Though he, too, was sobered, the news didn't affect him as much as it did her. Of course he cared whether Ami lived or died, but he knew that dropping in didn't make potentially comatose people better. Besides, he was so much more concerned over his own charge. "We'll go when yer better."

"Tomorrow, then."

Rolling his eyes, he reached out to pat the top of her head. "Four days." She would bargain.

"Tomorrow."

"Two days."

Something in his tone told her the decision was final, and she nodded. "Deal. Two days."

He held the bedcovers open with a triumphant smirk and waited for her to burrow underneath them before taking the chair where he planned to spend the night. He had just blown out the candle and was nodding off when a tiny voice called out.

"Yeah?" He cracked an eye open. Enough moonlight came through the open window for him to discern her outline. At the moment she lay on her side, closely scrutinizing him.

"I've never really done anything for you," she blurted out.

"What on earth would prompt y' tuh say somethin' that stupid?"

He heard the rustle of the sheets as she twisted into a more comfortable position. "Well...you're always there when I need you. And even when I don't," she mumbled as an aside, eliciting a snort from him.

"So lil' miss fair an' square doesn't think it's even, does she?"

"No." She fiddled with the hem of the blanket and continued, "If there's anything I can do for you – _anything _– you just let me know, okay?"

It took a while for her words sink in. Damn, there were a lot of things she could do for him if she only stopped thinking of Chichiri, starting with noticing him at last.

Tasuki's thoughts ground to a halt.

Throughout the day, he had been thinking of the spoiled little brat more often then usual. The thoughts that went through his mind were not comforting, either, warning him of a new, and potentially dangerous, territory. Yet he couldn't help smiling at her earnestness.

"Sure, though I don' think there's lots somebody who can't even fetch water can do fer me," he gruffly replied, and had the pleasure of hearing her roll over with a huff.

"Guess I can't count on a bandit to be gentlemanly." She had to add, "Except for Kouji."

Bristling, he shot forward in his chair so that his face was directly over hers. "I can too be gentlemanly."

She turned to the wall with a shrug. "Show, Tasuki, not tell."

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**A/N: Choppy is definitely the word for this chapter. Much like the previous one, it's supposed to be plot-driven. I can't think of any other way to imply the passage of time than to use cutback. I got used to doing that storyboarding for manga, but I guess it's just not the same for real literature. (sulks into a corner) Anyway! I'm working on that problem. (Don't hesitate to give me a little push in the right direction...read: reviewreviewreview) **

**Ahem. Next chapter will probably be devoted to Chichiri and Ami, and I hope to get somewhere with them. There is still a lingering question, though: how experienced is Chichiri with women? Until I get past that as well as manage to dig deep inside his head, I guess chapter 10 will momentarily have to be put on hold. But the updates will still come quick, because it's the last weeks of summer break, and...okay. Time to shut up. I'm babbling. Sorry.**

**See you guys next chapter! (If anybody still cares enough to follow this story, anyway...)**


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10: Secrets are Meant to be Kept

When he volunteered to go fishing for their hostess, Chichiri had expected some time alone with his thoughts. But when an hour passed and his mind remained blank, he knew it was hopeless.

The week had passed in a blur. Only few things stood out: the doctor's ever-present gravity, the woodsman and his wife's solicitations, and Tasuki and Lolita's visit. That last one he couldn't forget if he wanted to. His mind always went back to that second when his friends were first admitted into Ami's room and Lolita fell on her knees and cried. It was like a slap to the face admonishing him again about his carelessness.

Pinching the bridge of his nose, Chichiri allowed the pole to go slack in his grasp. He couldn't remember what he had told Tasuki exactly when they dropped by again only the previous day, but it had to be something along the lines of the temporary transfer of authority to make the sullen bandit puff up with male pride. With a tiny smile, Chichiri shook his head. Somebody was going to have to grow up while...

Then he stopped, smile slipping from his masked face. The gloom he walked around in wasn't too all encompassing to blind him to the looming necessity of moving out. Sure the elderly couple told him he and Ami could stay for as long as they needed to, but how long was that going to be? A few more weeks? A month? A year? Ten years? What if Ami never woke up?

For a minute he entertained the idea of teleporting to Mt. Taikyouku. The Nyan-nyans there could do better than any doctor, and it would end their excursion early. But he worried that Ami might be too weak to endure the strain of crossing several planes of existence at once. In the end, it might even do her in. After that he thought of sending Tasuki and Lolita ahead to their destination. Then again, that wasn't the point of the journey.

Thankfully, a tug on the line kept Chichiri from having to think any more. Catching the pole before it slipped from his hands, he struggled to reel in the day's only catch. The fish was visible under the shimmering surface of the river, swimming in frantic circles. Carefully balancing himself, Chichiri stood and yanked backwards. With a loud splash, his catch flopped out of the water, more than big enough to keep. Despite himself, the monk grinned as he gathered his things and headed back to the hut in the woods.

Finally, something had gone right in the week of disappointments.

The woodsman's wife shared his enthusiasm over the fish. While she fussed over supper, Chichiri retreated into Ami's room again. Over time, it had become a sort of habit – his seeing her first thing when he returned from an errand – and they were never disturbed.

It always amazed him how, try though he might, he couldn't feel guilty in her presence. Every time the door closed behind him, the troubles he had been putting himself through seemed so silly; and though asleep, it was as if it was Ami herself who was telling him that. In fact, he had even taken to speaking to her. Most of the time, he told himself she was listening.

Not that day, though.

He thought he'd tell her about catching supper, that she had better hurry and wake up so she could see for herself. Then he felt the chi levels in her room make a drastic drop, and knew that he had been making pretty fancies for himself all along.

Even then, the part of him that refused to believe speculated that it was anxiety finally catching up with him. Or maybe his abilities were getting rusty after a week of disuse. But whatever it was, it had him running to her side.

Her usual expression was replaced by one of deep peace, as if she had finally signed the waiver to forfeit life.

"No! No no no no no!" Chichiri clutched at her pulse. Weak, but hanging on. "Ami-chan!"

Rushing to see what the fuss was about, the woodsman's wife saw him bent over the bed, fingertips lightly pressed against Ami's temples. "Should I call for the doctor, Chichiri-san?"

Yes.

No.

"Maybe you should, no da," he replied distractedly, trying to pick up the scattered pieces of his energy. Taking several deep breaths to collect himself, Chichiri focused his chi until he found and sank down the wavering thread to Ami's consciousness. Not surprisingly, her defenses were easy to break down. Almost as soon as they linked minds, his chi flooded hers, filling the emptying spaces with a sudden warmth. From the far reaches, he could detect her slipping away, draining into an abysmal void.

There was no time to apologize for the invasion. Bracing himself, he plunged in.

At first there was light – a glow enough only to see more of the darkness ahead. Her mind was worryingly empty, all thought banished like little animals scurrying back into their burrows. He walked alone. It was cold inside that dying mind, and dry, as if the tides of life had ebbed away into the gloomy recess he knew he couldn't enter. And silent though he was, his footsteps echoed on the floor of her consciousness.

No matter. She couldn't hear him.

But the light ended too soon, and he was left to find his own way in the stark blackness.

It was then that he felt the vestiges of life – choking, whispering strangled words of sheer pain – and was hopeful. He ran forward. Wary twittering echoed over his head. The sounds were like tiny fairies debating whether to show themselves to the newcomer or not. Goosebumps raced up his arms.

"Ami-chan," he dared call. It boomed in the silence, bouncing off invisible walls to return, unanswered, to him.

The twitterings stopped.

Farther on, he met with wet sand. Somewhere, she was waiting to die. Sometime soon, he would have to find her. But he would no longer use his voice. Like a cloak, he gathered his energy around himself, sweeping it over more territory as he ventured deeper and deeper into her mind. When its hem detected the first tremors, he knelt down, hoping by his stillness to coax her forward.

Nothing.

He hesitated, and then walked even farther. Wet sand gave in to water. A shiver made him stop. Whatever prodded that sensation, it wasn't pleasant. A gust of wind assailed him from the left, leaving in its wake a twinge of desperation. He was growing more confused by the second, for there were no images, only her emotions bared raw for him to experience. Never had he thought she could harbour such intense feelings. As it was, he could barely keep himself from the enticement of tearing into her little secrets.

It would have been easier if they left him alone. But like ghosts, those secrets haunted him, brushing against his clothes, touching his face, urging him, inviting him to take a peek and understand the person whose mind he had the audacity to explore. More than once they threatened to overwhelm him, bringing back memories of his own that he had fought so hard to repress.

In all honesty, she didn't want to wake up. The world was too big, too mean, too difficult. Where she was, she was safe. There was no need to worry about wrong or right, or about how everyone around her would react to the things she had done. It was a wonderful feeling to be so in touch with oneself, to feel bound to that other person generally ignored in wakefulness. But it wasn't the right time for that. She felt it. The dawning around her seconded it. The annoying, incessant, beeping told her so.

_She wasn't too banged up to die. Not yet._

_Giving in, she allowed herself to float back to consciousness. A whirlwind of sound met her ears – talking, running, ticking, the beeping she had heard so much of. Experimentally, she found the tips of her limbs. Bare toes were concealed under a blanket, but they were there. Fingertips touched the same fabric the blanket was made of, though one fingertip was pinched and pounding. She couldn't figure out what had happened to it. Sighing, she opened her eyes to see what was wrong to said finger, and gasped._

_The place was an alien hole. It had to be, with all the cables and tubes and machines and wheeled beds and fluorescent lights and laboratory smells and clipboards and people in uniforms. And the noise! Groaning, she turned away to return to the blessed darkness, only to be interrupted by a pleasant voice. Once again, her eyes popped open. The voice was speaking in a language she recognized!_

"_It's about time you got up, honey." A nurse said as she bustled around the bed with the patient charts. Ami stared until it registered that she was in a hospital, not an alien hole. "You've been out for two days. Mighty bad idea to have gone downtown instead of to the docs."_

_She was only half-listening. On the table beside her bed was a piece of paper – plain, folded once. Reaching over, she opened it. From her mother and father._

"_I say," finishing her routine, the nurse peered closer at her, making Ami start slightly. Quickly, the note found itself crushed in her hand, stuffed under the blanket. "You're that senator's daughter, aren't you? Your mom and dad were here couple of days ago to see you, settle the bill... Strange how they never visited again." Turning to go, the nurse added, "Must be real busy running for senate president. Still, that doesn't mean you have to go ignored. If you need anything, honey, just call." With a wink and a wave, the older woman disappeared._

_Ami squeezed her eyes shut, hoping it was all nothing but a terrible dream. She promised herself to change, to be good, to do everything her parents asked her to. _Just don't make this real._ But the ache in the pit of her stomach was very much real, as was the stiff paper in her hand. Again, she took it out. The writing was in her mother's hand – neat lines of loopy script that filled the page – saying exactly what she thought it said._

_To the open doorway through which the nurse had just left, Ami sighed. "No use speculating over my parents. They're never coming back for me."_

He wanted to scream for the secrets to stop distracting him.

The moment the thought crossed his mind, his surroundings suddenly changed, hardening to repel an unknown body, forcing his chi into a tight little ball around him. A mighty wind raged, almost knocking him backwards. The persistent memories fled, hightailing back to their rocky lair. Water ran fast, rising up his ankles, threatening to drown him. From the darkness he saw a tiny beam of light. Then, he was sure that she was coming round.

Letting go of whatever hold he had had on her mind, he rappelled into his own, snaking through the flooding labyrinths back to the light of his own head. Safe inside, he eagerly watched for her awakening.

As far as she was concerned, everything was fine. She was watching old memories on the big screen, reliving the joys, wincing at the worse moments, and crying when she remembered to. Then towards the end of it, a long-forgotten reel of film popped onto the projector, forcing her to see that very scene she had struggled to put behind. It wasn't supposed to be unearthed – not now, not anytime soon, not ever – yet there it was, making her squirm and want to run away.

But the last film wasn't really all that bad. Terrible as it was, it had made her so desperate to search for other sources of entertainment that she actually bothered to peer into the bleakness she had left behind. Were it not for that she would not have discovered the presence of an intruder. Afraid that he might discover her big secret, she put up her defenses once again. Surprisingly, he chose to flee, though Ami felt that if he wanted to, he could have easily smashed her walls and forced his way in.

His sudden departure left her standing alone, staring and shaking her head at the wasteland her mind had become. The place was inhospitable – probably riddled with potholes and ditches – yet there was somebody interested enough to travel through it.

She asked herself why.

The visitor left a trail of luminescent red thread, a guide to help her find her way out of the dark. She had a fleeting idea as to who had left it. Acting on a compulsion, she grabbed one end and followed where it led.

It ended at the brink between the conscious and the unconscious, giving her the option to turn back and hide, or dive into the light. To the darkness she yelled, asking what to do. Silence met her question. So she threw it to the brightness, and the brightness responded with a rumbling chuckle that sent chills of delight through her. Still, she hesitated, and turned to stare the other way.

The darkness felt stale, like a merry-go-round that went in endless circles until all she wanted to do was tumble out and throw up.

The light, then?

The light, at the moment, was too brilliant for her taste. It would niggle out every little thing she wanted to keep private.

Maybe she should just wait at the threshold until someone – or something – made her decision.

No, that was cowardly.

Stamping her foot in frustration, Ami scowled at the light. Then, with a final look at her safe, dim nest, she fell, allowing the brightness to swallow her whole. Just as she disappeared over the ledge, the waters rushed out full force, waves cresting on the remains of her mental wall.

This time, there was no beeping. Just silence, and an excitement radiating from a source so close she could feel it.

She wasn't alone. But she would be damned if it was just a nurse come to gossip about her parents. Then again, she had made her choice. It was time to face it. Breathlessly, she made herself look.

No tubes. No glass windows. No talking, no rushing. Nothing remotely space-age. Except for the blue-haired man looking down at her, everything seemed normal...albeit old. Really, really old. Where the hell was she? She opened her mouth to ask, but instead of the question, a name sprang from her lips,

"Chichiri."

The man smiled, prodding the rusty gears in her head to whirr to life, the previous events she had been through clicking into perspective. Remembering the deadly cliff, she wriggled her feet, wincing when a thrumming pain clambered up the side of her ankle. Gaze not even leaving her face, Chichiri supplied, "You twisted your right ankle, no da," with such nonchalance she waited for the catch. Maybe they had to amputate her arms or something, and a twisted ankle was good news compared to that.

Suddenly, Ami didn't feel too good. Slowly, she flexed her elbows. Still there. Hands? Still... Her eyes widened. She couldn't move her left hand. Panic-stricken, she fought to right herself, only to be pushed back down onto the bed. An elderly woman appeared at Chichiri's shoulder, fretfully asking what was wrong. On the verge of tears, Ami stammered something about her hand.

Chichiri looked sheepish. "There's nothing wrong with it, no da." Releasing it from between his own, he settled for rubbing slow circles on her palm.

She fell back with a nervous sigh, content for the moment that she had made it out of the experience in one piece. The elderly woman, determining that Ami was, for the moment, as comfortable as she could be, bustled back to the kitchen, leaving her guests to look at each other awkwardly.

Chichiri was going to begin his litany of apologies and promises when Ami closed her fingers over his, cutting him off.

"Just now...were you the one inside my head?" Though she spoke softly, he could not deny the defensive edge in her tone.

"Yes, no da." There was no lying out of that one.

"Did you see..." She trailed off, clutching tighter. "Did you see...anything?"

He saw absolute darkness, and the trails of death snaking through her consciousness. There was also that gushing of emotions, though he knew she did not need to hear that. And finally, there was that one nagging remembrance that seemed to want to bare itself to him.

"Nothing, no da."

A hint of mistrust flashed in her eyes, but vanished as soon as it came. As she drew her hand away, he found his gaze following its movement to her chest, where it finally settled atop her heart. From there, his eyes swept upwards to her smiling face, and he started at her obvious relief.

"Thank you for being here."

"You know I can't leave you, no da." He told himself to add, _in your present condition,_ but somehow couldn't find the words.

"I hope you won't find reason to."

****

**A/N: Pretty short chappie, but the last few days have not been conducive to anything, thanks to global warming. People from four-season countries, be happy. You cannot imagine what it's like to have to live through summer in a tropical country. Up north, in our capital, the temperature reached a whopping 48 degrees Celsius. Thank god I live down south.**

**Anyway, my debt to InkedButterfly: Sorry I forgot to reply to your question in Chapter 8. I have this nasty habit of rambling off and forgetting the main topic until my rambling gets too long and I have to stop...See? I was doing just that and I do it all the time... (clears throat) Okay. When I wrote the scene in question, I actually had Mozart's Turkish March on my mind. Unfortunately, that it all conjecturing, as I am not musically gifted (was laughing at the Earthlings when God was doling out musical talent in heaven) and do not know, and perhaps never will, whether it is possible to play that piece on the Chinese instrument referred to in the abovementioned chapter. I'm glad you liked Chapter 9, though in truth, I was completely serious when I asked the question about Chichiri. But if it made you laugh, oh well. That's got to be an answer in itself, I suppose. (grin)**

**I have to stop here, people. Don't know when the next chapter's coming up, but I sure will think about it. (More like, obsess about it until posting.) Anyhoo, to those who haven't reviewed yet, don't be shy. Tell me what you think. Or bash me over the head. Whichever suits you. (shrug)**


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11: Where There's Fire, There's Me

Sweat streamed down his face as he set the heavy sack of supplies at the kitchen door. From the stove, the lady of the house smiled at him, nodding her thanks. He didn't see her, and she followed his wandering gaze to the open run where a few horses peacefully grazed.

"Pretty hot weather, isn't it?"

He started. "W-weather. Yes. Hot. Very hot." His face was flushed; she knew it wasn't the summer heat.

"You like that young lady over there." She had come to the point in life where anything she said, no matter how blunt, would be viewed as observant, not nosy. It was true, too, for the young man blinked at her in utter surprise. He didn't look like he would answer her directly, so she returned to her chopping board and pretended it wasn't important. "Old women like me have a host of special amulets for every purpose imaginable. I believe the most popular ones are the love amulets."

He made a sound between a chortle and a sigh. "I don't want ta' use amulets on 'er. That'd be unfair."

She shrugged, trying to suppress the smile clawing its way out.

The young man, completely taken in by her poker face, continued to stare. His brow creased, and he looked sometimes to be debating with himself. At last he cleared his throat. "Ya know...girls."

"Yes, I do. I used to be one myself."

He fidgeted. "What...they, um...sure like weird things..."

"Really."

"Yes, really." Face almost matching his flaming red hair, the young man jerked his attention back to the yard. Giving him a sidelong glance, the landlady indulged in a grin, wiped her hands on her apron, and raised both eyebrows at him.

"If you need help, it wouldn't kill you to ask."

"I-I don't. Need help, I mean. I don't."

"Men aren't the only dense creatures in the world, if you must know."

He frowned at her. "Whassat s'pposed ta' mean?"

"Nothing. But I make very nice little dolls."

"That's got nothin' ta' do with anythin'."

"It does," she assured him calmly, going back to her cooking. "But you may believe what you like."

He shook his head and began to stride towards the girl struggling to get on one of the horses. But he had not gone three feet beyond the doorsill when he backpedaled. The landlady found herself looking at a very red face.

"Ya gotta make me one 'a those dolls."

"Only if you help."

His face took on a flabbergasted look, mouth opening to begin a protest. But he shut it again very quickly. "Fine. Deal. And...and put one of those amulets in it or whatever."

"I'll keep it in mind," she replied sweetly, watching his retreating back.

"Hi guys." The yawn could no longer be suppressed as Lolita walked through the kitchen door. She was stripped down to a tank top and jeans, grey sweater draped over thoroughly scratched arms and hands. From where he was setting the table, Chichiri called out a reply, pencilled brows furrowing worriedly when he saw her.

"What happened to you, no da?"

"Saddle wrestling," she answered, stifling another yawn. "Would you guys mind if I turned in early? I'm kinda tired."

"Do want dinner no da?"

"No, thank you."

When she had disappeared down the hall, Chichiri turned to Tasuki, who was tossing another piece of wood into the fireplace. The bandit shrugged. "She's been like that fer a while. Must be some crazy woman thing."

"What crazy woman thing?" a new voice asked. Ami walked in, glancing over her shoulder. "Lolita's going to bed this early...?"

Tasuki nodded and returned to the fire. "_That_ crazy woman thing."

Ami picked up some pieces of cutlery to help Chichiri. He smiled at her. "Somebody should check on her, you know. Excessive sleeping isn't normal."

The fire was blazing merrily when Tasuki walked to the door with a snort. "Nothing is too abnormal for her. Now if you'll excuse me, I have business to attend to."

Chichiri raised his eyebrows. He glanced at Ami but she lowered her eyes, rearranging bowls and chopsticks over and over again. That was odd. Then again, most things have been different for the last few days. Ever since her accident, Ami didn't seem to be quite the same anymore. The sugar-high laugh was gone, as was the running around and bouncing off walls. Only a half-hearted smile flashed every now and then lightened her solemnity. It was as if she was trying to keep something under wraps...

Or rebuilding the walls he had broken down.

That was it, wasn't it? Chichiri frowned. It couldn't be. He had been inside her mind and there was nothing to hide. His eyes travelled to her face of its own accord. She was pretending to be absorbed in her work, but there was a certain hardness in her eyes that was hard to miss. Was Ami...really hiding a dreadful secret?

He loathed to even think about it. There was nothing she could have done that would exceed his own crime.

No. It was nothing but little moods. Soon enough, he was sure she would come around.

"Chichiri?"

He blinked at the sound of her voice. "Yes?" Ami was scrutinizing him closely, a bowl frozen in mid-air. He hadn't realized he had been staring at her for the past couple of minutes.

"Is there something on my face?"

"No, no da. Everything's fine, no da."

She nodded and finally set the bowl down. The scent of dinner wafted in from the kitchen, followed shortly by their landlady carrying a tray of steaming food. Chichiri jumped up to help her while Ami went to call the others to dinner.

Tasuki was easy to find, lounging in Lolita's room. He sat with his back to the door, struggling with something.

"Dinner's ready." He practically flew off his chair at her voice. "Why are you guys so jumpy lately?"

Laughing nervously, he fidgeted to conceal whatever was on the chair.

"Are you okay, Tasuki?"

"Yeah. Never been better." The stiff smile was sliding off his face.

"Well...okay. Come on in to dinner." Ami was turning to go when she caught sight of something on the floor, plainly visible between the bandit's legs. Striding forward, she bent down to pick it up before he could protest. "Is this what you're working on?" She examined the sewn bits of cloth, but could not make out what it was supposed to be. Consideration for the blushing bandit, however, prompted her to smile and hand it back to him without comment. He grabbed it with a gruff "Thanks," and stuffed it into the sewing bag on the chair.

"So let's go!" Tasuki declared a little too enthusiastically, having shut the flower-embroidered lid. Ami just stood before him, still trying to peer behind his back. He sighed loudly. There was no way one could hide girly secrets from girls. He almost regretted asking the landlady the special favour that morning. "I know ya wanna know what I'm doin'."

"No!" the girl replied instantly, throwing her hands up to emphasize the negative. But when he cocked his head and dubiously stared her down, she nodded. "All right, so I am."

He rolled his eyes. "It'sadoll."

She was about to pull one of her "What?" faces again when understanding took over. Tasuki could practically see her jumping from one conclusion to another. "Ooh...I get it." A wide, devious grin spread across her face. He winced. "It's for Lolita, isn't it?"

As usual, she concluded right.

"Yeah," he admitted in defeat, expecting her to giggle and tease.

"Don't worry. I won't tell." The bandit lifted his head, surprised. Ami stood with her hands on her hips, looking at one of the beds where Lolita slept deeply. "She doesn't see it, does she? But I do." Spinning towards him, "This'll be our little secret. That all right with you?"

He nodded numbly. "Yeah, that's a'right."

"Great. Now let's go to dinner."

"Festival daaaay!"

Sleepily rubbing his face, Tasuki rolled over with a groan. So early in the morning and Ami was making so much noise.

"Good morning everybody, no daaa!"

Now Chichiri had to throw himself into the fray. From her bed, Lolita emitted a similar groan of complaint and buried herself deeper under blankets Ami was trying to wrest away.

"Leave me alone."

"Nooo! It's festival day, Lo! Rise and shine!" When her unwilling victim refused to comply, Ami unhesitatingly jumped onto the bed. Lolita shrieked, bolting awake in record time.

"What's wrong with you?" she gasped at the same time Tasuki rose on his elbows to throw them dirty looks.

"Ya girls jez can't shut up, can ya?"

Ami burst into hysterical giggles, sliding off the bed and onto the floor. From where he stood at the foot of Tasuki's futon, Chichiri smiled at her.

Last night, he worried over her listlessness, but "festival day" seemed to have cured it. Just then, he realized how much he had wished her to laugh again while the compulsive part of him wanted to take her on a run through the nearby woods. But... His eyes darkened at the remembrance. That last one wasn't really going to be too much fun anymore.

"Hey." A swat at his legs made him look down. Tasuki was staring up at him. Chichiri raised his eyebrows and received a flickering glance at the girls' direction. He frowned. Shaking his head, the bandit rose and stumbled out. "Jez ferget about it."

What was that about?

Once more, Chichiri let his attention drift to the other half of the room. Ami was still draped half on the bed, half on the floor, telling Lolita something that made both of them start giggling all over again.

"Tasuki and I are going to help with the festival preparations, no da," he called to them. "Are you girls coming?"

"I'm in!" Lolita instantly volunteered, climbing out of bed to trot towards him. "Ami, you in?"

Her face lit up in a grin as she bounded up and tackled Lolita from behind. Still hanging from the other girl's neck, Ami nodded eagerly. "I'm definitely in!"

When their eyes met, Chichiri blinked in surprise, but soon found himself returning her smile. Yes, his Ami was definitely back.

Even though the sun was just going down, the insides of houses were already swathed with shadows. The only light that could rival the brightness of the torches in the town square came from the busy kitchen. The corridors were dark, closed in on either side by walls.

It wasn't particularly easy to look for someone in the growing dimness, even though that someone had flaming hair perceptible from miles away. Lolita had been doing that for the past fifteen minutes, and she was growing impatient. The landlady told her she hadn't seen him, which, after scouring the town and asking around, left her the only option of looking into every single room of the house they stayed in, hoping the witch of darkness hadn't eaten him up yet for playing hide-and-seek after sundown.

She chuckled at the thought. Woe to the witch who actually attempted that.

Every single open door revealed nothing but empty rooms beyond. The only room to try was the last one down the cluttered hall. Its door was closed, but the faint orange light of a lamp seeped out from under the door.

She knocked.

"Yeah, I'm almost done," replied a voice. Tasuki. She couldn't be mistaken. Slowly, Lolita opened the door and poked her head in. The bandit she had been looking for was hunched over a table littered with bits of cloth and thread. If she looked very closely, she could identify the edge of the landlady's sewing box.

"Almost done with what?" His curse drowned in a hiss. Lolita had let herself into the room, which she noticed was the master's bedroom, but edged back at the dangerous scowl on Tasuki's face. "I can, uh, leave..." She fumbled for the doorknob.

"No, no," he protested quickly, expression softening. "Sorry I scared ya. Did'ja need anythin'?"

She noticed that he was trying to hide something that lay on the table. "What are you doing here? And...what's that behind your back?"

He thanked the strong shadow that covered the dark flush spreading across his face. "I was, uh, finishin' somethin' fer the landlady. She said I could...work 'ere, so I...wouldn't be disturbed."

"Do you need any help?"

"No!" he spat out, almost too violently. "I-I mean, I'm good. Thanks. You?"

She looked confused. "What?"

"Why are ya here?"

"Oh. I stopped by on my way to gather some more firewood for the bonfire. The men asked me say they're almost ready for you."

They stood in silence until Lolita turned to go.

"Hey, it's...already dark outside."

"Yes?" she paused at the threshold.

"It might be...uh...dangerous," he finished lamely, eyes downcast. The woods were so thin even a child wandering there in the dark would have nothing to be afraid of.

She shrugged. "Don't worry. I've got a torch." She paused to wait for his reaction before continuing. "Remember what you told me when we left the bandit hold to go to Eiyou?"

He shook his head.

Her cheeks pinked. "Never mind," she mumbled, and left.

As Tasuki stared at the closed door, he slowly brought the nearly completed doll from behind his back. Under the lamplight, its yellow yarn hair glowed molten gold, exactly as Lolita's did. He had been rather surprised to see that, the first time.

_They were camping in the wilderness a day's ride away from the hideout, and settling down to sleep. He had probably already drifted away when an incessant rustling noise shook him back awake. Survival instincts kicking in, he shot up ready to fend off attackers, only to see Lolita tossing on her bedroll._

"_What th' hell's th' matter with ya?" he had asked. She told him she couldn't sleep; the forest sounds were creepy and the ground was hard._

"_`Course it's hard," he muttered, flopping back down. "If it wasn't, ya would've been swallowed up in it like quicksand," he chortled at his own joke. She didn't even giggle. "Yer not laughin'." _

"_Can I sleep beside you?"_

"_Hell no!" When he sat up, he saw that she really was afraid, but there was no way he would let a girl get that close to him, even in sleep. With a loud, annoyed sigh, he relit the campfire. "Tell ya what. Ya see that fire? That tiny, little ittybitty bit 'a fire?"_

_She nodded._

"_It'll protect ya." His amber eyes locked with hers. "An' I'm th' fire. So ya don't hafta be scared a' anythin' 'cuz where there's fire, there's me."_

...Where there's fire, there's me.

Indeed, the heat from the torch in her hand made her feel safe in much the same way Tasuki's presence made her feel safe. Lolita's ragged breath turned into a shy smile at the memory as she tossed another twig into the basket at her arm. Excited sounds echoed from town. Farther ahead, the river glowed faint orange from the myriad candles set adrift in thanksgiving to Suzaku. Pretty. Very, very pretty. She trudged farther in, her footfalls muffled by a carpet of damp leaves.

"...please...help..."

She jerked upright.

"...somebody...here...help..." the croaking voice came again. Against her better judgment, Lolita inched forward. The voice grew louder, but the pleas remained the same. Her heart lodged itself in her throat. In the underbrush, a lumpy shadow moved, twitching as if in pain...or in that desperation that comes before death.

"Who's in there?" For all she knew, it could be a trap of sorts.

"Thank Suzaku...I'm...here..."

Suddenly, she knew whom the voice belonged to. The silk merchant.

"Are you okay?" Though he was all over the ground, the elder man was all right. He let Lolita help him up, and together they hobbled back towards town. With the light from her torch shining full in his face, Lolita could pick out an assortment of scrapes. She glanced backward; he was close to dragging his feet.

"The Konan guards have been looking for you since you disappeared. They thought you were kidnapped." As she said those words, a guilty twinge bit her. There they were, pretending nothing too bad had happened after Ami was pronounced safe and recovering, while another person was at the hands of the revolutionaries-turned-bandits, probably suffering a worse fate. She whispered an apology.

"The revolutionaries..." the man began, but was gently shushed. They had arrived at the outskirts of the settlement and were making their way to the house the seishi and the girls stayed in.

"Please save your strength. You can talk after you've rested." Lolita looked around for her companions, but almost everybody was gathered around the blazing bonfire. The merchant was leaning more heavily on her each passing minute, and she wasn't sure she could still support the man's weight. "Tasuki!" she called, staggering.

"This is important," the man began again. "The revolutionaries...are coming..."

"They're not. This town is under heavy surveillance. Chichiri! Ami! Anybody!"

"They're...coming tonight."

Her calls died out. "What?"

He nodded weakly. "I heard them plan...the attack. Payback..." then he fell silent, head rolling onto his chest.

Panting, Lolita wildly surveyed the area. If what the merchant said would happen... If it happened. It couldn't happen. The people were completely oblivious. To them, tonight was a night of celebration. They couldn't possibly think anything like an attack... It would be hell, this blitzkrieg. So many would die...

"Tasuki!" still dragging the unconscious merchant with her, she screamed his name until her throat felt raw. Fire. He said she would be safe where there was fire. She had fire; the torch was blazing hot. But she had never felt more scared in her life.

Where there was fire... where there was fire...

A faint thumping reverberated in the distance.

Somebody ran out of the house. It was him, coming to her with his god-given speed to catch her before her knees buckled.

"They're coming," she gasped. "Oh my god, the revolutionaries are coming."

"What are ya talkin' about?" He led them back into the house.

"The silk merchant said...I saw him in the woods. He said they were coming. Payback...then he passed out. They're coming tonight..."

He hustled into a spare room and shoved them into a corner. "Calm down!" Outside, the ground vibrated with the force of horses' hooves. Black silhouettes rushed past the window, highlighted by the glint of sharp steel. Tasuki muttered under his breath. Lolita was close to hyperventilation. "Calm down!" he ordered, shaking her by the shoulders. She nodded, like a rag doll. "I'm gonna go find Chiri an' Ami. We'll hold our ground there as best we can. There's no time ta warn th' soldiers." Removing a dagger from his belt, he thrust it into her hands. "I need ya ta be brave. I need ya ta take care a' th' ole man fer me while I'm gone. Can ya do that?"

"I'll try..."

"Lo! Can ya do that!" His hands steadied her face, forcing her to meet pained amber orbs.

He didn't want to leave her... She nodded, firmly closing her fingers over the weapon. "I can. I'll do anything you say."

"Good girl." He grabbed her torch. "Stay here an' don' make a sound."

"Be careful," she whispered. He nodded, and was gone. The door closed behind him, bathing the room in darkness.

Curling herself up, Lolita rested her forehead on drawn knees. The merchant was still passed out at her feet. She thought it was from exhaustion and did not bother to stir him. It was probably better that way. He wouldn't be talking and luring the revolutionaries to them.

The front door banged open.

She sucked in her breath. They weren't there...it was just the stress...it was just the stress...it was just the –

Heavy footsteps resounded in the foyer several rooms away. Gruff voices called to each other. Doors were opened, and then banged closed again. Lolita lifted her head, dark-accustomed eyes darting around the room. Soon, the revolutionaries would come upon their door. And they were huddled in a corner, completely exposed under any light.

They had to hide somewhere. The voices were coming closer. She was panicking. Where? Where?

Under the bed. Without a second thought, Lolita quietly dragged the merchant across the room and shoved him under the bed, remembering to arrange the sheets so that they draped to the floor. There was only room for one person there, but she could hide in the closet.

The men were only two rooms away now. She scrabbled on her hands and knees, crawling back to where she had come from when her hand fell on something soft. She paused. In the faint moonlight, the lines of a doll were visible, needle and thread still dangling from an unfinished seam on its body. It had most probably fallen from the table beside her. The table...in the master's bedroom...where Tasuki...

"Well, well, well. What have we got 'ere?"

She whipped around, starting to her feet. Light spilled into the room from the open door, through the bulk of the man standing there. Lolita unsheathed her dagger.

"It will really be so much easier if you don't use that, nee-chan," he drawled, sharp eyes flicking towards the blue gleam. He took a step forward; Lolita backwards. It was like a dance. One that would end only at the death of one of the dancers.

"Yer bunch sure has given us some hella trouble." He began ticking off his fingers as he spoke. "There was that little chit of a girl we were supposed to make good money off. Jumped off a cliff and died. Then one of you knocked out my best men and burned down the tavern. You can't believe how much shit that put us in. Then another one of you – a goody-goody – had to go get the Konan Imperial guards. Those boys have been on our tails so long we can't hardly get our act together."

Lolita swallowed. She knew exactly what he was talking about.

"But that's a'right cuz I gotcha now. And Imma make sure ya don't run off get yourself killed like yer friend." He advanced several steps, and she retreated until her back hit the closet. "There's no escape now."

_I need ya ta' be brave..._

_Oh, Tasuki. If only I could. If only..._ With a desperate cry, she lashed forward with the dagger. It connected with muscled flesh, slicing clean through. The blade whistled, spattering warm liquid on her hands. Her attacker swore loudly and lunged forward. They slammed onto the wall and then slid down to the floor, Lolita pinned underneath the bigger body. She gasped as his weight bore down on her, crushing her lungs. And gently, the drowsiness that had become so familiar settled upon her, slackening her grip on the dagger.

_Not now. Please, not now..._

Her eyes were closing even as she fought to stay awake. Realizing his victory, her attacker staggered up, towing her with him. Pushing away, Lolita earned herself a gruff reprimand and rough shove towards the door. Her body was shutting down. She tripped over her own feet and walked right into furniture. As she passed by the bed, she heaved a quiet sigh of relief. At least she had been able to keep one part of her promise: the merchant was safe.

She only hoped he wouldn't be found and the building wouldn't catch fire.

"Hey, I don't have all night," complained the bandit, nudging her forward.

The world swam in a hazy swirl before her eyes. Lolita fell on her knees, leaning against the doorframe for support. "I can't stand anymore," she pleaded.

"`Course you can!" He grabbed her shoulders, attempting to hoist her up. "Little tricks like that don't fool me. You were fighting a coupla' minutes ago!"

She shook her heavy head. The pressure of his grip on her arm melted away in a vague dream. Everything seemed like a dream – the fighting, the screaming outside, the soldiers' bloodstained spears...none of them were real.

"...Rekka shinen!" She was even hearing things now. But that was all right, because it was the sound she most wanted for hear since the nightmare began. His voice...signalled the start of good dreams...

"Lolita! Lolita!"

Her eyes closed. "Under...the bed..."

"Under what! Damn!" Kicking away the crumpled body on the floor, Tasuki sheathed his tessen to slip his arms around his new bundle. Chichiri came running behind him, pulling Ami by the hand.

"What happened, no da? Is Lolita-chan okay?"

"I think so," he grunted, moving out the door. "Is it safe to go out yet?"

"The Konan guards have everything under control, no da, and the horses are tethered near the woods."

"Great. Look under the bed."

"Why, no da?"

"I dunno! Lolita said somethin' `bout 'under th' bed'. You guys check. We'll go on ahead." He took off without waiting for a reply.

The battle was still ongoing, but most of the villagers had been evacuated and the soldiers looked like they had the upper hand. Tasuki crashed through the brush behind the house. The horses were in plain view, calmly waiting for their riders to arrive. Grabbing the reins of one to steady it, he lifted Lolita onto the saddle. As he did so, something tumbled out from the folds of her robe.

He stooped down to pick it up, but couldn't quite find it in the dark. Muttering to himself about girls and their little trinkets, he got down on all fours, patting the grass until he felt something soft and fuzzy. Needle and thread still hung from a corner.

She had found the doll.

Something like a cross between relief and pride washed through him at the discovery, and he broke into a great smile, the toy cradled in his hand. She had found it...and kept it. A part of him wondered whether she knew he was making it for her.

"Tasuki, no da!"

He spun around. Chichiri and Ami had returned.

"Get on the horse no da! We have a long ride ahead of us!"

It only struck him to ask when they were racing down the trail. Twisting in his saddle, he eyed Chichiri. "What was under the bed?"

"The silk merchant," Ami replied for him. "We managed to find a soldier who promised to help him evacuate and locate his companions. He's awake and mostly all right. I can't imagine how Lolita knew he was down there."

Holding his precious burden closer to himself, Tasuki grinned. He had asked her to be brave and to protect the old man. And she did.

She really did.

****

**AN: Oh, wow. This actually took up more than ten pages. I didn't think it would take so many words to create a scene...(sweatdrop) I'm sorry this chapter took longer than usual. I just wasn't sure what to do with the story. There were loose ends that needed to be tied up, and I'm proud to say that I've done all that in this chapter! (cough::forgot the merchant::coughcough) Hahaha!**

**So. You guys know the drill. Please, please leave a review, those people who haven't yet. Geez, this is already the eleventh chapter! And thanks to the one person who never fails to review. (wink) A big hug to you!**


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12: Discovery Comes After Confusion; Confusion, Discovery

In the still dimness, two other figures lay in sleep around her. There was no fire, but the body protectively curled up beside her kept her warm. Nestled in her hands, already stitched through, was the doll she had picked up the previous night. Rising slowly to her elbows, she carefully turned it over.

It had a funny little face – buttons sewed on for eyes, a slightly off-centre smile, a fat, plushy tummy, floppy arms and legs, and a mop of shocking yellow yarn hair. It even had a little dress. Her heart warmed as she looked at Tasuki, who was still dead to the world. Could he really have made and finished it overnight?

Then Lolita had to stifle a giggle as a thought occurred to her. Carefully rolling away from under their shared blanket, she tiptoed to the horses. The saddles were on the ground beside them, heavy with belongings. She searched through her backpack and triumphantly pulled out the long-forgotten sketchpad. Making her way back to Tasuki, she arranged the doll beside his face, and waited for the sun to rise.

It wasn't much for laughs, but it was the closest thing she could get to a photograph. Not to mention he looked ridiculously adorable sleeping with a doll.

In the inadequate light, she took to flipping through the pages of her sketchpad, and then stopped at the bloodstained page that was supposed to contain Chichiri 's picture. All it had become was a ruined draft and rusty iron blots.

It felt so long ago since then. She traced her fingers on his pencilled outline but her heart no longer skipped a beat like it used to. There was no race of giddy excitement, no threatening tears of melodramatic longing. There was just a calm...like...she had moved on.

He always said she would, though she never believed him. Or never wanted to. In the growing light, she searched for his slumbering figure and only felt the warmth of friendship.

She_ had _moved on.

A hand flew to her mouth to contain the choked sob. She couldn't have moved on; not when a bit of her did not yet feel ready to leave the old comfort of living for him. The sketchbook slid off her lap, stirring her companion awake. She was too preoccupied to notice until he rose and laid a gentle hand on her shaking shoulder.

"Hey."

"Morning," she fought to control the tremor in her voice as she swiped a hand swiped across her eyes. "You're up early."

"Why were ya cryin'?"

"Wasn't," she lied, settling the discarded sketchpad back on her lap. He didn't look like he believed her. Laughing nervously, she gestured at the doll lying face down on the bedroll. "You should have slept on and let me have my fun."

A perfect eyebrow arched as he looked between the fresh page, her pencil, and the doll. "It ain't funny." But he smiled, and instinctively reached to wipe the tear-tracks on her cheeks. Lolita flinched at the touch. Immediately, his hand dropped, and he turned to get up.

She caught his wrist. He paused to look at her. Then the events of last night came crashing upon her, no longer dreams, but terrible realities.

"I'm sorry I got caught last night."

Shaking his head, he sank down before her. "But ya fought, didn't ya?"

She rolled her eyes. "_I fell asleep_. In the middle of battle. If it weren't for you, I would have gotten myself killed."

He blanched at the thought. "Look, it doesn't matter, a'right? I got there in time, yer fine, the merchant's fine, and those damned rebels won't be doin' any more rebellin' fer a long time."

She thought for a minute. "How did you know to go back?"

"Saw 'em. Heard 'em. Thought ya'd need a little help."

"Seems as if all I'm able to do is need help." Smoothing the blankets, "Speaking of which, you still haven't told me how I could pay you back for all those times, last night, included. Darn, my list of debts is getting longer and longer."

"Ya found the doll and kept it. `At's 'nough."

She perked up. "So you really did make the doll."

Realizing his words, heat rushed to his face. Too late to take them back now. "Uh, yeah." Tasuki fiddled with a loose thread at the hem of the blanket and in a little voice admitted, "It's s'pposed ta be fer you." When some time passed without her replying, he glanced up, uneasy. Lolita had taken the toy up to her face and was rubbing the fuzzy surface on her cheek.

"Wow," she breathed. "Thanks."

"It's nothin'," he replied, fierce blush abating. "Squeeze the belly." Confused, she did so, and found a stiff, slim slab of something. "It's an amulet," he explained. "The landlady had tons of 'em so I asked 'er ta put one in fer ya, ta keep ya safe."

A pleasant shiver trickled down her back at his words, and hotness welled in her chest in time to the quickened hammering. "You already keep me safe, Tasuki. I don't need any amulet."

"Jez fer insurance."

The sky was already bright with the risen sun. Sooner or later, Chichiri, the earliest of the usual early risers, would be up. Quickly, Lolita grabbed Tasuki's hand and leaned forward to peck his cheek. "I still owe you," she whispered before running off, tightly clutching the doll.

They were, all three of them, gathered round the fire when Lolita walked back into camp, towelling her wet hair. Tasuki was piling sticks into the lusty fire, but when she plopped down beside him, he abruptly stood, muttering something about gathering more firewood.

Suspiciously, she watched him go, red-faced. "Is that a personal quirk I've never seen before?" Shaking her head, she turned her attention instead to Chichiri, but made a face when she saw him cleaning fish.

"I'm gonna go take a bath," announced Ami, who had been rummaging around one of the bags.

"I'm...um...gonna accompany you..." Lolita weakly mumbled an excuse as Chichiri curiously studied her cringing expression. "You know...watch out for...um...intruders..." Flashing him a quick smile, she hurried back down a trail into the woods behind Ami.

As soon as the sound of streaming water had taken over the forest sounds and they were out of earshot, Lolita skipped up beside the other girl. "That was the most disgusting thing I've ever seen."

"What? The fish?" Ami laughed, basking in the puddles of sunlight that floated down through the overhanging branches. The descriptions she had heard about Konan heat always sounded so overrated, but travelling during the last few days of summer, she realized that they were, after all, true. Excited feet carried her down the tiny dirt road, eager for a dip into the cool river. Trailing behind her, Lolita continued to mutter.

"...did you see what was inside of those things? I mean, the frogs in Bio were bad enough, but now I know for sure fish are so much more disgusting..."

"Their insides all look the same, Lo!"

"Don't talk about it so flippantly. It's a serious subject."

Ami laughed. The river was visible already, wide and sparkling clear. She took off and in no time was splashing happily, Lolita perched nearby as a sentinel.

"So." Immersed in the water, Ami crossed both arms atop a flat rock and mischievously gazed up at her companion. "How did you like it?"

"How did I like what?"

"The doll," she exhaled exasperatedly, rolling her eyes. "The one Tasuki made for you."

Lolita looked taken aback. "How did you know about the doll?"

"Please. Just because I was an invalid for two weeks doesn't mean I'm also blind!" She grinned. "Did he say anything?"

Lolita's cheeks warmed as she remembered what had happened that morning. But now that she thought about it – really tried to replay it in detail – she saw that, except telling her about the amulet, Tasuki hadn't actually said anything. Nothing that would warrant the impulsive kiss she gave him, anyway.

The blood that rushed to her head stayed there.

"...Anything?" Ami ducked as Lolita's towel came flying into her face, but the moment the waters closed in over her head, a sudden tremor ran throughout her body. Her limbs went numb, rendering her helpless. It might have only been a second or two, because the moment she wanted to cry out for help, her senses came back to life and she burst through the surface, gasping for breath.

"Ami...?" At Lolita's concerned voice, she looked up mid-breath and realized that she was clinging desperately onto the rock like somebody swept downstream would onto a flotsam.

"I'm fine," she quickly replied, disappearing once again under the water to finish her bath. Lolita waited uncertainly until her friend poked her head out of the water, wrapped a towel around herself, and sloshed out.

"What happened?"

"I don't know," she admitted, slipping into her own clothes. "Most probably nothing. I bet everything on its being just stress." Twisting the water out of her hair, Ami nodded at the footpath leading slightly uphill back to camp. "Shall we go?"

Nodding, Lolita followed her lead. But not ten minutes passed before she spoke up, "You're different from what I used to think," which made the other girl stop dead in her tracks and slowly turn around. There was a hint of pain in her eyes as her gaze levelled her friend's.

"What do you mean?"

Lolita looked a little embarrassed to have brought the subject up so suddenly. "I meant...in school." Ami waited tersely for her to continue, and at last Lolita smiled a little. "I used to think...well, I didn't think anything very good back then. You're probably wondering how I can say that when I didn't even recognize you when you dropped into Konan. It might sound pretty strange..."

"You remember me from school?" Ami interrupted.

"Just now, yeah," Lolita admitted, looking abashed. "I'm sorry I didn't before. I was too much of a stuck-up brat to care about other people. But sure, I've passed you at hallways sometimes..."

Ami wasn't sure whether this was supposed to be good or bad. She hated asking; she didn't even want to think about asking, but the internal curiosity was just begging to be indulged.

"And, um, what do you remember?"

"Enough to be able to tell you're not the same person anymore." Talking about it was like having teeth pulled. Lolita couldn't understand why Ami carried on the discussion, as clearly as it was making her uncomfortable to no end. For her part, she was sorry to have ever spoken about it in the first place. Stepping up to her silent friend, she spun her around back to camp. "I shouldn't have mentioned it, and I'm sorry. If you like, we'll just forget about the whole thing."

Ami sighed, but gratefully gave her a thin smile. "I'd like that very much, but forgetting does not make the past go away."

"Listen to you! You're beginning to sound like Chichiri!" Lolita whined, petulantly crossing her arms and earning herself a sopping towel in the face.

The girls giggled their way back to camp, the incident, though fresh, easily pushed into the recesses of recent memories. There was no need to bring that up ever again, as far as they were concerned. However, out of sight in the foliage beside the path, Chichiri waited for them to disappear over the crest, wishing he had not run at the sound of voices and had just interrupted the conversation.

Whatever he had heard, though only half-understood, he wished he never heard at all.

Though it was uncharacteristic of him, Tasuki nevertheless brooded before the fire. They had ridden some miles away from the village and had come upon the first carts of what was sure to be a whole band of merchants. The tiny trail, widening somewhat, finally began to lead northward. In a few days' time, they would reach the ocean – unfortunately – and then take another turn into the wilderness towards Taikyouku.

Where he had put her to bed, exhausted from travel, close to the fire and near him, Lolita stirred. After having it pointed out several times, he had finally thought about it and realized that her sleeping habits were growing stranger and stranger. What he had once before dismissed simply as "weird girl things" were making him worry some. Never before, not even during their trip to Eiyou from Mt. Reikaku, had he seen her so worn out.

As he watched, her eyelids fluttered open to blink right into the inky sky. "Did I sleep...again?"

"Yep."

Sitting up, she ran a hand through her hair. "Where are Chichiri and Ami?"

He smirked. The monk was standing by one of the carriages in a group, looking very much like a mother hen. "Ami wanted ta get a readin' from one 'a 'em fortune-tellin' gypsies, so' Chiri went ta make sure she ain't bein' told anythin' too bad."

It was meant to be mildly funny, but Lolita only rubbed at her sleepy eyes. "Did you want to go, too?" she asked, making him laugh awkwardly.

"`A don't need anythin' told me!"

"Well, you were being awfully quiet," she remarked, throwing a sidelong glance at him. "I have been awake for a while, you know, waiting to see if you'd say anything, or stand up and complain about being bored. But I never heard a peep."

"Ya were watchin' me?" he repeated, feeling rather strange about it.

"Not in the physiological sense, no, because I had to pretend to be asleep and everything..." catching his expression, she started over. "Sort of."

"Why were ya' doin' that?"

_It seemed like the right thing to do?_ She shrugged the thought off, even as the old rush of pleasure surged in her veins. Why, indeed, was she watching him? Because he looked so romantic in the firelight? Because it suddenly hit her that he was an interesting person to observe?

No, no. Those were all the wrong answers.

Risking a peek, she saw that he was still waiting, gaze so intense she felt she should say something deep and poetic.

"Um...I don't know."

That was far from poetic. In her defence, it was the first thing that came to mind. And no one could contest that lame though it was, it was a pretty neutral excuse.

They were beginning to fall into a wondering silence when he snickered. "`A was quiet 'cause `a was thinkin'."

But he never was one for philosophising... "What were you thinking of?"

Her heart leapt as his amber orbs flicked towards her and settled on her face. She felt as if she knew the answer, written all over his uncertain face. He looked like he would spit it out one minute, but in the next, he took a deep breath, composed himself, and said,

"Nothin' much."

Neutral too. It just occurred to her that two could play that game. Darn.

"So...uh..."

Did he change his mind and finally decide to say it...whatever "it" was?

"...why are you up all of a sudden?"

"I...had a dream..." Her voice was quiet when she said it because she wasn't sure whether or not she wanted him to know. But in the end, the desire for a confidante outweighed any other objection and she continued, "...about my home."

He stiffened. Obviously, he had already considered Konan her home. And Lolita thought she could think of it that way, too, until the mysterious bouts of sleep grew longer and longer and with them brought dreams of the life she had wished to leave behind.

"I dreamt about the first time I learned to play bits of this song my mom loved." Her hands clenched together. "She was so _so_ happy about it – more than I ever thought she would be – and all I wanted then was to make her proud. I swore to do _anything_ to see her that happy again."

His gut feeling told him to rail against her storytelling. It made her homesick, and at their present situation – him forever tottering on the edge of confession while she remained completely clueless – he knew it was the last thing they needed. And yet he did not have the heart to be selfish.

"So yer still goin' home?"

It was her turn then to look unsure. They locked eyes, and it seemed to him that she was searching for the right answer in them. The right answer was always important to her. Never mind if it was not applicable; if it was right, it was enough. He waited with baited breath.

"Do you want me to go?"

Throwing the question back at him was cruel; that much she gathered. But the roiling of her insides made it hard to consider her next words. Whatever she said would bring about a change in his countenance, though she wasn't sure which answer would bring about the change she wanted to see. Heck, she wasn't even sure she knew exactly what she wanted to see.

Then, in a voice so husky she wanted to melt in it, he replied, "No; I would never want ya ta go."

Shoulders slumping, she dropped her head, hiding in the shadows as a stifled cry of relief fought its way out of her throat. His answer, said so sincerely, echoed in her ears like a welcome whisper that banished all previous uncertainty.

"Then I don't want to go. I don't want to leave you."

Her body moved of its own accord and she threw herself across the scattered blankets into his arms. When he crushed her to himself, they fit perfectly, as if they had been made for that exact moment. Never mind that she had to turn her back on childhood memories just when they were beginning to go back to their pure, pleasant state. There were more important things at hand.

Such as, for instance, understanding why she was finally able to let go of that old infatuation.

**A/N: Huaaaa! I didn't expect things to get here so soon, but apparently, that's what you get when you work with the seishi of speed. I hope it didn't feel rushed, as I repeat, I am new at this romance thing and therefore need you guidance, patient readers. Writing the last scene was a struggle, but at last, it came through (after numerous deletions) and we can finally get to the next chapter. I'm excited about writing it, but I still have to clean up the scenes in my head, so yeah. Expect the next chapter to be kind of cute (if I do say so myself). **

**Oh, and I still have a few dirty secrets up my sleeves, so stay tuned for that. Don't forget to review!**

**...One more thing: thank you to those who subscribed to this story and/or added it to their favourites list. It's great to know people care about it. And a shout-out to InkedButterfly for being such a faithful reviewer. Honestly, your reviews keep me going when sometimes I wonder whether this piece still makes sense. Lol. Thank you all, once again!**


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

Three years ago she was fifteen years old and madly in love. He was a senior, to her young eyes, at the height of manliness. Everything about him was beautiful – from the way his auburn brown hair tossed about in the wind to the way he swaggered down the school halls. And she would watch for him – wait at her locker until he passed by and she was late for class. That said, she was always late. But that was no matter, even though she was sent to detention several times, because seeing him made it all well worth it.

_One fateful day she decided to take matters into her own hands. Running away from detention, she caught him at the parking lot with a bunch of his friends. And throwing caution to the winds, she blurted out that she loved him. She wasn't sure how to feel, but the glow of pleasure and pride at having had the courage to say her feelings out loud seemed right. Unfortunately, it kept her from noticing the abnormally eerie stillness._

_He broke into laughter. His friends joined right in, snorting and chortling in her bewildered face. _

_Only then did she realize that something was wrong. Horribly, terribly, wrong. _

_The whole parking lot joined right in the laughter as if her emptying her heart out to the mortal god was some sort of joke. She felt sick. She felt sicker than sick. The embarrassment was so bad she wanted to melt and drain in a runny heap into the ground. _

"_Trying to run away from the boyfriends daddy chose?"_

_She stepped back, but they closed in around her, jeering and grabbing at the books on her arms. Her things clattered onto the ground, notebook falling open to reveal the lovingly made portrait tucked away on a back page. Instantly, the laughter escalated, and with it rang the sound of ripping paper. Through the ball of ice forming in her stomach, she dared raise her eyes, but saw only his disgusted ones bearing down on her, brimming with disapproval while the picture of his face was considerably passed around and abused by his friends. _

_It was put into his hands. Steely blue eyes barely flicked at it before he crumpled it into a ball and, smirking, tossed it in her face. She flinched, but only let it drop to her feet, tattered and dirty. _

"_See you at the VIP room tonight, babe!' he called over his shoulder as he turned to leave. _

_Suddenly, the swagger did not seem all that beautiful anymore; the form, cruel and bullying. But there was nothing she could do. After all, she chose to walk right into the situation starry-eyed. The result was inevitable. _

_Hands trembling, she stooped to gather her things to the echo of laughter and a few sympathetic whispers. Show over, the audience returned to their own lives. Even then, she still felt as if the eyes of the world remained on her. So she flounced away, back into the school, back into the fifth level, back into the practice rooms where she could hide and think until there was nothing left to think and cry about._

The sudden rush of air was refreshing. Lolita hadn't realized that she was holding her breath in her sleep. She sucked in several lungfuls, slumped against the hard body behind her.

"You okay?"

She nodded wearily, his voice sending a shiver down her spine. In the memory-dream, the voice belonged to another mortal god totally different from the mortal god she was leaning against now. But the fear had resurfaced, and suddenly she wasn't sure she could carry out what she had planned to do. Now that she was older, it was time to begin considering the possible consequences of her actions.

There weren't too many alternatives in the pleasant department. Maybe she should start at the Terrible Results department.

At the top of the list was what she had blindly hoped for at fifteen.

Lolita let out a long sigh. The caravans in front of them were slowing down, scouting for a suitable camping spot. Chichiri was up there somewhere with Ami while she and Tasuki lagged behind. Though she didn't like thinking it was because her riding partner hated jarring her too much when she was asleep, that was most probably the case.

As the caravans slowly dispersed to opposite sides of the road, Tasuki steered their mount over to where Chichiri had chosen to settle down for the night. Sliding off, she left him to tend to the horse while she unpacked the necessary belongings and ran off to help set up camp. All night, she barely turned towards him, tensing or getting up when he came too close.

The disapproving glances Ami sent her did not go unnoticed, but the terrible feeling from the old trauma resurfaced every time she thought about telling him...telling the man she...

Loved.

It was like a heart attack coming. And it hurt when her mind persisted on linking the old with the new. Tasuki was nothing like that dark-haired man-boy she thought she wanted to die for at fifteen. Tasuki was not like Chichiri, who was gentle even as he broke her heart. Tasuki was Tasuki, fire and ice all at once, both burning her sweetly and terribly.

Yes, the heat was agonizingly wonderful. So wonderful, in fact, that when he sat down beside her, she abruptly left camp like a flustered fool. She could almost swear she felt his eyes bear holes into her back, and walked faster, forgetting all grace as she jerked to the dark bank that sloped down to the nearby beach. Then, certain of solitude, flopped down onto the prickly turf.

Salty sea air settled heavily over the waters, signalling the coming of a storm. It was a familiar smell like so many others there that reminded her of home – boiling waves crashing onto the deadly jagged cliffs and washing multi-coloured pebbles onto the sandy shore, the starlit sky, the inky horizon unbroken by the beam of a lighthouse, the distinct aroma of seaweed so strong she could almost taste it...

But home wasn't a refuge anymore; not when it was the one place where he could never reach her.

To take her thoughts from the questions racing in her head, she pulled out her iPod. The battery was running low, but would hold out for a few more minutes. Then, blissfully unaware of her surroundings, she closed her eyes, lost in music she had not heard for very long.

It might have been only a few minutes, or an hour. The next thing she knew he was kneeling beside her, shaking her awake. Sitting up, she scoured the surroundings for other people, but besides both of them, there wasn't a soul in sight. Colour drained from her face, and she unconsciously backed away from him.

"Ye'll get cold sleepin' out 'ere." Nodding his head in the direction of the camp, "Come on an' ya can stay beside the fire."

She swallowed nervously. Beside the fire? Beside him? Once he told her he was the fire. Was he thinking of that now?

Her head swam in continuous whirlpools. "I, um, I'm fine here."

"I'll go get ya some blankets, then." He disappeared and she rubbed her face with her hands. If she continued to act like she did, walking on eggshells around him, he was sure to notice...if he hadn't yet. And it would get ugly and awkward, because they had to travel together, and there was still a long way to go before they got to their destination. She had to fix things...somehow.

When he returned with the promised blankets, she was sitting straighter up, outwardly calm, inwardly breaking down into a terrified mess.

"Would you..." she held out the iPod tentatively, "listen to something?"

"Sure," he complied, waiting while she scanned the array of songs until she found what she was looking for.

Just a day, just an ordinary day...

He glanced at her, but Lolita stared hard at the darkened screen, tightly clenching the slim metal thing.

Just trying to get by

_Just a boy, just an ordinary boy_

_But he was looking to the sky_

_And the foreign girl even had the gall to try and stare him down. In his country. On his mountain. In his freakin' fortress! Yet he couldn't decide whether that was annoying or endearing. _

_He smirked as her eyes began to water and she narrowed them, glaring right at his satisfied expression. _

"_Ya can't beat me, so juz give it up."_

"_Not until I get what I wished for. You owe me that much at least to make up for your bandits' – aargh!" She blinked and screamed in frustration while he broke into rip-roaring laughter._

"_I win! I win!"_

"_No fair! Stupid well only gave me half my wish!"_

_He understood then that she was pitifully slow. Any other person lost in another world would have bawled her eyes out. But the stupid girl he was stuck with seemed to think it was all a wonderful dream come true. It must be so sad to be so stupid. _

"_A'right, a'right," he conceded. "Ya lasted nearly a minute. Long 'nough, in my opinion. I'll take ya ta Eiyou. Chiri should be there." Shaking his head, he added as an aside, "Scary stalker freaks."_

_And as he asked if I would come along_

_I started to realize_

_That everyday he finds just what he's looking for_

_Like a shooting star he shines_

"_Listen, a'right? The sooner we get to Eiyou, the sooner ya get ta see Chichiri!"_

"_I'm tired! I can't walk anymore!"_

_He whirled around at her decisive whine, hands planted on both hips, and attempted to glower. But when she pulled a pitiful face he relented, stomping back to the emerald grass spread out on both sides of the path. "Fine. But we only get ta rest ten minutes, a'right?"_

_She rolled her eyes. Wasn't he always the wheedling brat during travels with Chichiri?_

"_I'm not sitting on the grass. I bet it's got filthy animal drool all over it."_

_He huffed in exasperation. "Then where the bloody hell does _Yer Highness_ want ta sit? Up the fuckin' tree?" he jerked a thumb upwards and into the spreading branches of a towering oak._

"_And ruin my hands climbing it? No way!"_

_And he said, "Take my hand_

_Live while you can_

_Don't you see your dreams lie right_

_In the palm of your hand?"_

"_Get changed and I'll bring ya somewhere. Ya look terrible with your hair sticking up all over th' place."_

_Self-consciously, Lolita ran a hand through her locks. "Where are we going now?"_

"_Not far."_

_And as he spoke, he spoke ordinary words_

_Although they did not fail, no_

_For I felt what I had not felt before_

_You'd swear those words could heal_

"_The stars are really pretty." _

_He snorted. Silence settled between them. They were lying close enough that if he reached out a little, Tasuki could hold her hand in his._

"_Don't you like stars?"_

"_Sure. They're 'ere every night. `Can't get rid of 'em if ya tried."_

_She made a face at him. "Well, I like stars."_

"_You only like one of 'em," he mumbled morosely._

_And as I looked up into those eyes_

_His vision borrows mine_

_And I know he's no stranger_

_For I feel I've held him for all of time_

_The wispy beginnings of a fog were making themselves known between the trees. Then in one sudden motion she was deposited in his lap. Tasuki's arms were around her, pressing her against his chest and into the warm confines of his coat._

"_Still cold?" he grumbled._

"_N-no." Allowing a tiny smile to flit across her face, she relaxed enough to prop her cheek on his shoulder. He smelled different. Unbidden, her face found its way to his neck._

"_Am I too heavy?"_

"_No," he mumbled, staring up at the snatches of sky between tree branches. "Yer just right."_

_And he said, "Take my hand_

_Live while you can_

_Don't you see your dreams lie right_

_In the palm of you hand?"_

_In the palm of your hand_

When the final strains stopped vibrating, Lolita dared look up. Everyone was staring at her in surprise. From the back of the crowd, applause began to ring out. Then somebody shouted for another song, which was loudly seconded. She peeked at Tasuki.

The bandit was grinning widely.

_Please come with me _

_See what I see_

_Touch the stars for time will not flee_

_Time will not flee, can't you see?_

He got down on all fours, patting the grass until he felt something soft and fuzzy. Needle and thread still hung from a corner.

She had found the doll.

Something like a cross between relief and pride washed through him at the discovery, and he broke into a great smile, the toy cradled in his hand. She had found it...and kept it.

_Just a dream, just an ordinary dream_

_As I wake in bed_

_And the boy, that ordinary boy_

_Or was it all in my head?_

"_The landlady had tons of 'em so I asked 'er ta put one in fer ya, ta keep ya safe."_

_A pleasant shiver trickled down her back at his words, and hotness welled in her chest in time to the quickened hammering. "You already keep me safe, Tasuki. I don't need any amulet."_

_Didn't he ask if I would come along?_

_It all seemed so real_

_But as I looked to the door I saw that boy_

_Standing there with a deal_

"_Jez fer insurance."_

_The sky was already bright with the risen sun. Sooner or later, Chichiri, the earliest of the usual early risers, would be up. Quickly, Lolita leaned forward to peck his cheek._

_And he said, "Take my hand_

_Live while you can_

_Don't you see your dreams lie right_

_In the palm of your hand?"_

_In the palm of your hand_

_In the palm of your hand_

" I would never want ya ta go."

_Just a day, just an ordinary day_

_Just trying to get by_

_Just a boy, just an ordinary boy_

_But he was looking to the sky_

She took a long time winding the discarded cord around her iPod, never once looking up at him. Tasuki waited for her to either say something or walk away, though he had to admit that he would not allow the latter option to happen. At last she raised her eyes, hands held together on her lap.

"How did you like it?"

So she was calling on him to be a connoisseur now? "Okay," he replied confusedly.

"If it..." She started over. "If I said...it was meant for you... How would you like it then?"

"It had no ending." His voice was filled with regret.

Rising on her knees, she leaned forward to meet his mouth, lingering there uncaring of whether anybody saw. Surprised, Tasuki lost his balance, sending them both down on a dogpile. When she drew away, her eyes were bright with uncertainty. "How about that ending?"

He gazed up at her in silence until she moved to roll off and he grabbed her arm. "There's no need ta be scared 'round me, 'cause I want ya."

As they lay together on the sand, with the water crashing only a few feet away, she told herself that the exhaustion was due to the immense relief of his reply. He never said outright that he loved, her, but Lolita knew that Tasuki wasn't one for that, and was satisfied to press herself against him and give in to the slow lull of sleep.

She didn't think contentment came with breathing him in and feeling the traces of his hungry kiss on her lips, but there it was, tearing her between laughing or crying for joy. Curling up deeper into his bent body, she lay her forehead on his chest, feeling the heartbeat there. And all at once the moment seemed so fleeting, as if the significant things were nothing more than spirals of dust on the universe's book of records.

"Tasuki." Her head throbbed with the heavy responsibility of capturing the event forever. "Tasuki, are you still up?"

He groaned sleepily, cracking an eye to look at her. "What is it?"

"You'll always remember tonight, won't you?"

"'Course," he promised rather detachedly, intent on settling back to sleep.

It wasn't enough for her. "And you'll always remember it for me, too?"

Now wide-awake, he stared down in bewilderment. "What are ya gettin' at?"

"If anything happens tomorrow...if I don't wake up tomorrow, or ever again...you'll remember tonight for the two of us. Promise me."

"Lo, yer bein' silly. Nothin's gonna happen."

"Promise me," she insisted.

"A'right, `A promise." Pulling her closer, he pressed a kiss to the top of her head. "Now go ta sleep."

Something, like a nightmare, woke him up. He couldn't remember what it was about, but the attempt to remember was immediately banished by the lightening sky. Beyond the sandy bank, sounds of early morning preparation had begun. A few small dots of orange campfire littered the ground around the parked caravans. Soon, some of the merchants would be heading to shore to fetch water and wash up.

Tasuki turned to the figure huddled against him, so sweet in sleep he hated to wake her. But they had to return to camp soon, or Chichiri was certain to come looking. Gently, he shook her shoulder.

No response.

"It's time ta get up." He shook her harder, but she stayed asleep. "Lo, is ya think this is funny, lemme tell ya that it's not." Behind the wheedling tone streaked the beginnings of panic. "Lolita, get up."

Sunshine touched the blue ocean, shimmering the waves in sharp white. Sounds of more and more people going about their daily business drifted in from camp. A few tiny figures have even begun to make their way over to the cove on the far side of the beach.

She didn't stir.

His heart chilled as the image of Ami out cold on and near death very easily turned into Lolita. Jealously, he gathered her up. When they touched, his life force overpowered the weak, dwindling one. It wasn't like that last night.

...Or had he been too preoccupied with kissing her to notice?

"...if I don't wake up tomorrow..."

He could almost swear he hated himself then. Somehow, she had known this day would come, but he had refused to pay attention to all the little signs. And now it was going to be too late.

"...or ever again...remember tonight..." The wind carried her voice almost into the vacuuming silence. For the last time, she wound her arm tightly around his waist. "...remember I love you."

It was then that the nightmare came back full force. He dreamt she had left him forever.

****

**A/N: There you have it. I had this chapter all planned out days ago, but never quite felt up to writing it. And when I finally did, I had to start reading for school (whee! I finally have law subjects!), not to mention researching my costume and meeting up with the dressmaker for final arrangements. But at last, here's chapter 13.**

**I know I promised a cute chapter, but it turned out dramatic-ish (hangs head). I'm sorry for the disappointment... Things are gonna start going faster from here on (I hope so). I didn't expect to jump right to the middle of the story. But the timing just seemed so right I couldn't resist. (sigh)**

**You guys (I mean all of those who are still reading), please review. I've been saying this since chapter 1. Please. Oblige me.**


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14: Secrets Don't Stay Buried Forever

The meagre pile of sticks wasn't the driest thing in the world, so it was mildly annoying that after long minutes of endless patience, Chichiri happened to look up, see the rolling storm clouds, and found himself obliged to put out the smouldering mound. All around him the merchants were packing up, preparing to move away. One of them signalled to him and over the distance hollered, "Storm!"

Waving back, Chichiri replied, "We'll be leaving in a while no da!" Abandoning the fire pit, he began securing packs onto the saddles, once in a while peering out of the corner of his eye to check on Ami, who was still curled up in sleep. A little smile twitched up the side of his mouth. Making his way over, he put a hand on her shoulder.

"Ami-chan? Wake up, no da."

She stirred, moaned sleepily, and then blinked up at him. "What's going on?"

"There's an incoming storm, no da. We need to get going if we don't want to be caught in it."

Smothering a yawn, she hauled herself up and off the bedroll. "What about the lovebirds?"

"I was going to look for them." He stood. "Everything is packed and ready to go. I might take a while, so we'll just meet up at that abandoned villa." As he spoke, he nodded towards a decrepit structure nestled at the foot of a cliff. "Yamamoto-san," gesturing towards a nodding merchant, "has offered to take you. Please be careful, no da."

She looked away from the dark shape of the villa and opened her mouth to speak, but when she turned, he had already left. "Chichiri – " A rumbling thunder devoured her words, and then drowned it in a sudden sheet of cold rain. Fat raindrops assailed her, involuntarily making her shiver as they snaked a way down her back. Squeezing her eyes shut against an onslaught of unexplainable panic, Ami slapped both palms to her cheeks.

"Get a grip. There's nothing to be scared of." Letting out a deep breath, she cast a final glance at the figure in the surrounding greyness and threw herself back to packing.

The ceiling was dark – inky black and cavernous. Somewhere near it, water rippled quietly. The ground felt sandy under her hands, digging into her elbows as Lolita sat up. The jacket draped over her slid into her lap.

"Tasuki?" She had been lying near a pool. Fire blazed from a little pit not too far away. Behind it – far, far behind it – something shone a glimmer of dark silver. Rain. Pounding, pouring curtains of rain.

"Tasuki?" she called again, footsteps crunching as she stumbled in the dimness. "Is anybody in here?" Her voiced bounced off the smooth limestone walls, echoing, fading, dying.

There was no reply.

Casting a glance over her shoulder, Lolita walked away from the fire, edging around the pool to a little crevice in the stone wall. It was narrow, wide enough for only one person to go through at a time. Her breath came in heavy inhalations and exhalations as tentative fingers crept into the pitch-black opening. "Tasuki?"

The fire behind her flickered under a faint rush of air from the crevice. Spying orange light within, Lolita edged closer, then started back as a dark figure loomed up. The ground suddenly gave to water and she gasped, but before the scream could tear out her throat, the figure whipped out to grab her before she fell in.

"Y'okay?"

Heart still pounding, she nodded. "Yeah." A sheepish grin began to spread across her face as she looked up at her hero. "Thanks. Again." Then she peered over his shoulder and squinted into the blackness he had left behind him. "What were you doing in there?"

"Explorin'." He steered them around the pool and back to the cramped little campsite. Tasuki tossed his torch into the blazing embers. When he looked up again, he wasn't smiling.

"What?" her head cocked to the side.

"Ya dont' seem ta realize that we're somewhere else."

"Ya don't seem ta realize we're alone," she mimicked, grin widening. He only stared at her. Lolita's smile slid off her face. "I'm sorry..." she mumbled, studying the upturned palms on her lap.

"I thought fer sure y'd...left me...this mornin'..."

"Don't be silly, I'd just gotten up – " Words failed her when she realized that he was talking about something else. "Oh."

"Y' wouldn't wake up," he continued almost in a rasp. "I called an' called an' y' just lay there like y' were...like y' were..." He stopped himself short as two arms wound around his neck.

"But I'm still here. I'll always be here."

Sighing, he let himself lean into her shoulder and close his eyes. The fire danced beside them, sending little sparks into the air. On the other side, the water rippled red, like magma. He hugged her back, clutching her almost desperately.

Soothingly, he felt her hands rake through his rain-dampened hair. When she next spoke, her breath was upon his neck. "Tasuki...let's make nice memories okay?"

_While I'm still by your side. _

He nodded. "Okay."

Chichiri squinted under his kasa. Rain waterfalled down its sides, completely obscuring everything in front of him. Even when held before his face, he could barely make out the shape of his hand. Water from higher ground churned around his ankles to crash against the rising waves from the sea.

"Tasuki! Lolita-chan no da!"

It was a fruitless search. He couldn't even hear himself shout. When the storm drove inland, fiercer than ever, Chichiri knew he had to leave. Throwing one final glance backwards, he hoped his companions had found shelter and then turned his feet towards the cliff.

The narrow mountain trail was bumpy at best, but in the rain, it was slick, muddy, and so much the worse for wear. Ami and the merchant's boy tumbled in the dim shade of the caravan, desperately lashing down crates of goods before they fell out. The drone of the storm isolated the travelling party from all other sound except the sliding wooden boxes, the caravan's straining wheels, and Yamamoto-san's grunts as they skimmed the edge of the path by mere inches.

Ami shook from the sudden turns that more than a couple of times threw the caravan on its side wheels.

_We're not gonna die. Gods above, please don't let us die. _

She yelped as the car jerked right, bringing with it tumbling rolls of carpet and bags of supplies. They drove so dangerously close to the side of the cliff that when Ami hit the wall of the caravan, she felt the rough rock of the mountainside through the stretched hide.

"Keep yer balance, nee-san," the merchant's errand boy called out, attention never straying from the knot he was tightening. "It won't do ta' keep slidin' this way an' that!"

"Easy for you to say," she grumbled back, picking herself out of the mess of things that had cornered her. Pushing aside a dusty rug, she poked her head outside to the driver's seat where the merchant steered the horses.

"Yamamoto-san, are we there yet?" Ami tried squinting through the shower of fat raindrops but could make out nothing more than the waterlogged outlines of scraggly trees.

The merchant shook his head. "We're still half-way up the mountain, little lady. The roads are in bad repair this year, but I guarantee we'll make it," he winked.

"Ne," she persisted almost whiningly, "Is there no other road we can use? This one's pretty awful."

"Nothin' better than this, I tell you. This is the only uphill path that ain't seen bodies every rainy season."

Ami started. "Bodies?"

"Yep," Yamamoto replied almost nonchalantly. "Drowned people from upstream get washed up on the beach all th' time." He tugged the reins a little to the left and the caravan eased up a steeper incline. As they ascended to higher ground, a rushing, swollen stream clear across them came into view. "That one," he cocked his head towards the stream, "It's in good repair and wider than this little trail we're on, but nobody'd drive up there this time of year, even if their credits depended on it."

"There's..." she looked hard but could see nothing resembling a road in the direction the merchant indicated. "There's only a stream, Yamamoto-san. No road."

"Exactly. Turns into The River o' the Dead overnight on days like this one."

"River of the dead?" Ami wasn't sure she liked where the conversation was going, but something was slowly clicking into place inside her head.

"Dead bodies, wandering souls – the works."

"So this is the only viable path..." she murmured to no one in particular.

"We don't want no corpses jammin' our wheels, na?"

"We're only halfway up even though we've been travelling for some time already..."

"This path's a pretty obscure one. Gotta get right around the beach to find it. Then again, only us merchants p'rolly know where it is."

Her mental gears began whirring as the final piece clicked into place. "Yamamoto-san, please let me down! I've got to find Chichiri!"

The merchant yanked the reins and then turned to the girl with wide eyes. "You crazy, 'jou-san? Ya can't go out in a drivin' storm like this one. Bet'cha can't even find yer way down the mountain without first slipping into the nothni'ness beyond!"

"I'll be careful!" she promised, already scrabbling out the caravan. But before she could jump off, the merchant grabbed her cloak.

"If you're goin t' the River o' the Dead, just follow the curve of the cliff once you get off this trail. There's a ledge that's far above the water. Keep to it an' be careful in case it crumbles." His expression softened. "You got a good heart, 'jou-san. I'll be prayin' the next time I see ya an' yer seishi friend, you'll both still be in one piece."

Ami smiled, nodded. "Thank you." Then she hopped off and ran into the rain.

There was no way he could get to the villa. Chichiri clung to a twisted branch as he surveyed the uphill path. The floodwaters roared dangerously close, threatening to rip the dead tree right out from its roots. Even at his vantage point, there wasn't much he could see beyond the crumbling dune of sand that walled off the beach below. He hoped Ami had gotten to the villa safely.

Just as he was contemplating hopping into his kasa to wait out the tempest, he felt a sharp spike of chi. Chichiri jerked around but saw no one in the close vicinity. Instinctively, he sent out a thread of his own energy to try to identify the stranger. It was a little hard to navigate in the rain, but the person he sought to find kept up a straight path towards him. He probed farther and farther until at last he found what he had been looking for, and instantly recognized the tremulous aura.

"Ami-chan!" he fairly called out, releasing the tree branch before he could think of his next move. The earth collapsed beneath him and Chichiri suddenly found himself skidding towards the widening rush of water. In a sudden panic, he threw his arms up to his face as he plunged into the icy waters, completely letting go of the strand that connected him to Ami.

Her head jerked up as a warmth jerked right off her shoulder. Ami spun to the side, expecting to see her cloak caught on a stray branch or something, and saw instead a flash of blue disappear into the roiling River of the Dead.

She screamed his name as she scrambled forward, struggling to maintain a foothold on the narrow ledge she traversed. The cliff wall was slippery with rain and once or twice she came dangerously close to falling in. Ami grabbed at a tangle of vines, tested to see whether it would hold, and leaned far out over the waters, hoping to see Chichiri.

The unmistakable pattern of his kesa fanned out over the water's surface, and the first relieved tears leaked from her eyes. Defying every single bit of common sense left in her, Ami strained to reach the bobbing fabric, hoping it was still attached to its owner.

It was just within reach when she heard the heart-stopping sound of ripping foliage.

Eddies rushed towards her in an angry crest of white foam and filthy water. She attempted to grab the kesa at the last minute but it dashed against a boulder, limply rippling with the current. Ami just had enough time to whimper before she, too, disappeared under the water.

"_Just stay calm and keep your head above the water. I'll have you free in a minute." It was a half-lie, but it was a necessary half-lie. The child was panicking, and she couldn't start working on the knotted clump of seaweed if he continued kicking underwater. _

"_You promise you'll hurry?"_

_Glancing at the chubby little hand on her arm, she nodded. "I won't stop until you're free," Ami promised before diving back down. With the saltwater stinging her eyes, she had to resort to working blindly, tugging at the tangle of seaweed and hoping to be able to uproot them, at very least. What she didn't count on, though, was their being tougher than she had originally anticipated. While her hands slipped from the slimy strands, the waves continued to batter inland as if intent on washing her away. _

_She was getting frustrated when a second body floated down towards her. It was one of the trainee bodyguards, gesturing about something. _

_Knife, she mimed. I need a knife. _

_Nodding, he kicked back up to the surface and disappeared into the motorboat. _

_Ami returned to untangling the mass of green swaying around the boy's leg. She had managed to tear out bits of the seaweed, but the bulk of it still remained wrapped around his ankle. Once more, she glanced upwards into the shimmering surface. With every second, it seemed to grow further and further away._

_The boy struggled, obviously terrified. She grasped his trapped leg gently, asking, almost begging, him to keep still. Her lungs burned from a lack of air, and the spots that danced before her eyes now threatened to completely take over her vision. _

_She still needed that knife. _

_The trainee still hadn't returned. _

_The boy still needed to be saved._

_As Ami tore through the snarls, she saw one last option. If only she could force the knots loose enough for a second, the boy would be able to slip through. Almost without a second thought, she put her arms through the loop beside his leg. Feeling the new sensation, the child instinctively kicked out. In another moment, one of the lifeguards had successfully lifted him from the water. _

_Ami attempted to follow the upward trail he had taken, but suddenly found herself firmly attached to the sea bottom. The tangle had tightened around her left wrist. Overhead the motorboat sputtered, its occupants oblivious to her plight. It would be a while before the others noticed her failure to surface._

_Probably in another _long_ while._

_Against her better judgment, she gasped, allowing salty water to rush into her lungs. Help me, she wanted to scream, if only she had the voice. Help me. And then her eyes closed and her body relaxed under the high tide._

Chichiri's eyes snapped open. He was underwater, and yet he knew the panic he felt was because of something else entirely. Pushing himself up to the faint source of light, he broke through the surface in time to see the edge of his kesa sink under the current.

_Help me...help me..._

He sliced through the waters, wincing as it pounded the side of his face and dislodged the paper mask. Once again he sent out his chi. For a long minute he sensed nothing. And then a tingle ran up his left arm.

Underwater.

He dove down, eyes squeezed shut as he groped for a piece of fabric...an arm...a hand...anything. The chi he sensed felt close to winking out, and yet remained turbulent. It was a chi he felt before and knew all too well. The chi whose owner he had promised never to let alone again...

Skin brushed against skin. Chichiri grabbed at it, forcing his body deeper underwater as the current suddenly shifted upwards. The kesa billowed into his face and he knew he had found her. Almost roughly, Chichiri tugged the body upwards and crushed it to his chest.

A million volts of electricity instantly seared through his body.

Images flashed before his tightly shut eyes. Even though he couldn't understand what was happening, he somehow knew what the pictures were trying to tell him. They weren't his memories. They weren't his nightmares.

They were Ami's. And judging by their intensity, they could easily have been nightmares. The shock made his body cry out for him to break the connection, yet he found that he couldn't let go of her. Whatever Ami was trying to say oppressively bore down upon his mind.

They couldn't resurface. He tried swimming upwards, but the watery grave seemed infinitesimal and the images kept pressing downwards, forcing them into the icy depths. He didn't want to see them. They were Ami's secrets. The curiosity that used to bite at him had disappeared.

He didn't want to know.

He was afraid to know.

****

**A/N: Ahoy mateys! Let me begin by apologizing for this chapter's late-ness. It's not very long, I know, it was horribly difficult to write. I think I rewrote the entire chapter three...maybe four times before finally knowing just what to do with it. All the same, thank you for minna-san's patience. And to all the reviewers, **_**domo arigato gozaimasu**_**. You guys truly make my day!**

**I'm already working on the next chapter, but I don't know when I'll be able to post. This semester's been pretty busy and I can't figure out why. Going back on topic, though...the next few scenes will probably focus more on Chichiri and Ami since the original lovebirds have finally gotten over their hurdles. As to whether monk-man and his lady will ever find warm, fuzzy love-love, that's for me to know and for you guys to guess.**

**Keep the reviews coming! I'd appreciate constructive criticism. Ja ne!**


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15: The Truth Will Always Come to Light

Ami navigated the halls, cell phone clutched tightly in her hand. The day was a slap in the face, and yet it felt so surreal, like a terrible dream that should end soon. Her head throbbed, her body tense as she strode towards a dead end.

_The milling crowd had thinned. She turned a sharp corner and found herself facing the door to the custodian's supply closet. Someone else was already there, leaning against the doorframe. _

"_So what's with all this secrecy, huh?" The girl waved a disdainful hand at the dark corner she had been asked to wait in. "What's so important you can't treat it like girl's room talk?"_

_Ami furtively glanced down the deserted hallway before stepping into the little space beside her friend. "You've got to help me out."_

_Two perfectly arched eyebrows shot up. "Yeah?"_

_Once again, Ami snuck a peek over her friend's shoulder. The hallway was still empty. _

"_You're freaking out, darling," Jessica laughed. Ami shushed her. _

"_My dad might have sent people to watch me."_

"_That's only because you're such a bad girl." Another laugh. Ami merely shook her head, hands fumbling for a piece of paper tucked inside her bag. _

"_This is serious, Jess." _

_A rustle, and then Jessica found a crumpled sheet of paper thrust in her face. She took it __skeptically__. "Medical report? What have you got__? Leukemia__?" Then her eyes scanned down the page and the smile slipped off her face. "No way." She looked up at her squirming friend again. "You didn't really bed Jason, did you?"_

"_I did."_

_She shrugged, stuffed the sheet back into Ami's bag. "So are you going to...marry him or something?"_

_Ami shook her head. _

"_It's really your only saving grace. Your parents would kill you if they found out."_

"_I know."_

"_So..." Jessica sighed. "Go propose or something. I'll back you up."_

"_I can't marry him!" Ami practically hissed through clenched teeth. Face buried in her hands, her next words came out muffled. "I don't know if it's his."_

_Jessica's jaw slackened. "So whose is it?"_

_Ami shrugged helplessly, her shoulders shaking. "I don't know, Jess. I don't know. It must have been at that party last month or something. We were all so wasted, remember? Something must have happened then, but I can't remember with whom!"_

_The girls fell into silence, one thanking the gods it wasn't her, the other, about to break down. Finally Jessica sighed. "Have you gone to the doctor?"_

"_Yes."_

"_Well?" she prompted. "Will they let you do it?"_

"_Not without a parent's consent." Ami sank down, her sobs convulsive in the echo of happy voices from down the hall. "Daddy's running for senate presidency, so he and mommy are really busy. Plus..." She didn't have to say it for Jessica to understand that her parents did not need another scandal. _

"_Can your big sister keep a secret?" Jessica asked one last time, desperately grabbing onto anything._

_Once again, Ami shook her head. "She just made the Bar. Daddy's turning her into his protege. She wouldn't want anything to do with me."_

_The other girl thought for a long while. "I have one last option," she said, "but it's going to be risky."_

"_I'll try anything."_

_Jessica looked hesitant but at last said, "There's this woman in a downtown apartment. She might be able to help you..."_

Chichiri gritted his teeth as the force that tethered him to the darkness convulsed as if trying to shake him off. He was seeing things he didn't want to...things he couldn't understand. And he desperately wanted to snap back awake, to see the waters roiling around him, to be carried downstream...to shift from this new nightmare into the old one he had so long ago fought off.

Anything.

He was desperate for anything but to feel her fear, her spirit's screams even as her body pressed limp against his. If she let him, Chichiri was more than willing to heed her cry for help. But she was pushing him away. He wanted to respect that, even if it meant erasing everything he thought he knew about her.

Unbidden, his thoughts jerked to that bit of conversation he _deliberately_ overheard,

"...What do you remember?"

"_Enough to be able to tell you're not the same person anymore..."_

And he wondered who she was before she dropped into Konan. Who she was even before she became the person who dropped into Konan.

Maybe he would never find the answers. Maybe she would never tell him.

Maybe...maybe the answers were just staring him in the face, begging to be seen...

She swore that she would – could – never forget how she felt when she did what she did. The tear tracks were long gone, scrubbed away with the cold water that gurgled from the downtown apartment's rusty old faucet, but they would always be there, tattooed in her mind, a silent reminder of her biggest mistake.

_When she strode back towards her friend's home, she told herself to walk straight, to pretend nothing had happened, and to ignore the cramping pain in the pit of her abdomen. _

_She wanted to be sick. _

_Pausing against a wall to catch her breath, Ami squeezed her eyes shut. The tiny room, cluttered with mismatched furniture, the middle-aged woman standing at the other end, drawing the curtains shut, the pills, the paraphernalia she didn't even recognize...the locked door jamb, icy under her sweating palm. _

"_Nobody would be able to guess what happened," the woman cooed, and Ami believed her. Gesturing to the bed, "I understand you don't have much time..."_

"_But I can pay." Her own voice even sounded alien. She knew she was going to regret it, but she still reached into her bag and drew out a thick wad of bills. _

"_On the table...yes, right there. And then we can start..."_

_She gasped sharply, sinking to her knees as the pain finally caught up with her, directing the rest of the harrowing experience into focus. Cold sweat broke out over her forehead and slid down her clammy arms. She felt like she was going to die. The scene playing out in her head was coated in a sheen of crimson and punctuated with pain. The whole thing was sheer pain._

"_Hey, lady, are you okay?"_

_A passer-by's concern rippled out of focus, fading away and then booming close. She knew she was about to pass out, but she pushed the steadying arms away, the fear of discovery pushing itself before the fear for her life. "I'm fine," she forced herself to say, and couldn't hear herself. "It's just...heatstroke..." _

_Yes, heatstroke. In the middle of spring. _

_The emptiness within her suddenly pulsed, pulling forth a scream of surrender. The stranger grabbed her arm and she fell back against him, breathless, blinded by a cloud of the tears that once again resurfaced._

"_Should I call a doctor or something?"_

_Her head lolled side to side. "No. Just...just leave me alone. I'll be all right in a moment..." Drawing a shuddery breath, Ami pushed herself away from the stranger. She tried to stand, but her legs buckled under her._

"_Lemme call an ambulance –" she didn't hear the rest of his sentence, feeling only the dull pain as she collapsed onto the concrete._

Her supervisor wouldn't like it if she snuck out on duty, but Ami couldn't help giving chase. Dodging the people loitering in the audience halls, she shoved against an emergency exit door and burst out into the night.

"_Mom!"_

_The woman continued striding towards the waiting Mercedes as though she did not hear the call. _

"_Mommy!" Ami cried again, legs pumping under her as she fought to catch up to the red-gowned figure. "Mommy! I'm sorry! I've been sorry for so long –!" she lay a hand on the woman's gloved arm and was instantly shrugged away._

_The blue eyes that gazed back were like hers, only icier. "I believe you have more important duties than chasing guests around?"_

_Ami shook her head violently. "Nothing's more important than apologizing to you...and to daddy..."_

_For a moment the woman softened, but her gaze abruptly hardened again. "There can be no forgiveness for one who has sullied the family name. For generations, Amelia, the Langleys have always been prominent political –"_

"_It ruined my life!" Ami exploded before she could hold herself back. "I was made to do things I hated because of the family name! I wasn't me because of the family name! My own family didn't love me because I wasn't what the family name –" _

_A sharp slap resounded in the still air. The older woman was white with controlled rage. In an ominously quiet voice she replied, "You ruined your own life, Ami, when you refused to obey."_

"_But..but..." she bit her lip, her laboured breathing the only sound in the ensuing silence. "You can always forgive me, can't you? You and daddy both can take me back..."_

_The woman's head wagged sharply side-to-side. "The people demand perfection, and perfection is what they shall see." As she turned to go, Ami realized that she had only one last chance to argue her case._

"_I tried! You know I tried! And I gave everything I had. I even gave...my baby's life..."_

_Her mother froze at her last words. Ami waited with baited breath, hoping her mother would reconsider, hoping she could at least go back to her family. But when the older woman spoke again, her tone contained no sympathy. _

"_It wasn't yours to give."_

"What're y' doin'?" His amber eyes warily followed her movements as Lolita slipped into the rippling pool. A crack in the stone above let down a shower of rain, creating a mini waterfall. She had shed the heavy outer layers of her clothes and was sitting in the water in a thin robe. "Y' keep actin' stupid an' y'll catch a cold."

She laughed, the sound of her mirth carrying in the cave. "Care to join me?"

"What do I look like, a fish?"

Rolling her eyes, she sank deep into the waters. Tasuki spluttered and was on the verge of sticking his arm in to pull her out when Lolita resurfaced, grinning at him, chin cradled on her palms. "There's always something I've wanted to try..."

He raised an eyebrow. "I'm not sure I wanna know."

Unfazed, she continued, "I've always wanted to try kissing underwater."

He jerked violently and fell backwards. "No. No. No way."

"Come on, it'll be fun – achoo!" She giggled sheepishly. "Oops. Excuse me."

"See?" Tasuki sighed, lifting her out of the water. "No way I'm kissin' ya now. Ya might 'ave cooties!"

"Do not!"

"Do too!" Setting her on her feet, he tossed her her outer robes. "Get out of those wet clothes."

"Ooh. Someone's getting impatient."

He spun right around on his heels, face burning red hot. "Shut up and get changed, already!"

"No peeking!"

"As if!"

When Lolita exploded in laughter, he knew he had fallen for her bait. "Gotcha!" she cried out in a singsong voice and then rushed to hug him from behind. "Tasuki, let's play pretend!"

"Grow up."

"It'll be a nice pretend!" she promised, releasing him to plop down before the fire. "Close your eyes," she instructed, closing her own, "and think of the most wonderful thing in the whole wide world. ...Think of...a nice rainy day, for instance –"

"It's raining outside," he snorted. "No need to imagine that."

"Shaddup and imagine. Anyway, it's raining. And you're outside, no umbrellas, no boots, no nothing but the shirt on your back."

"I imagine some perverts would be lurking nearby for a sight like that," he added derisively, sitting down beside her. Lolita slapped his knee.

"It doesn't matter, though, because you're out there with me. And the rain clouds will all gather on your head –"

"Hey!"

"– because they know how much you hate water. And the little icy droplets will pound down your back, slithering all over you like miniature serpents –"

"Overactive imagination y' got there," he said, reaching over to grab her. Lolita's eyes flew open, but she didn't move from their awkward position. "Y're weird today."

"You tell me that everyday."

A snort. "Why're you suddenly all mushy-mushy?"

"Why are _you_ letting me get all mushy-mushy?" She countered, cocking an eyebrow at him. Tasuki didn't spare her a glare, and only stared at the fire.

He shrugged. "I dunno. Maybe it's 'cuz..." then he trailed off, glanced down at her, and smiled sadly. "Ever since this mornin', y'know...I've had this feelin'...that yer not goin' t' be 'round much longer. So I thought...whatever ya wanted ta do...I'd let ya do..."

She buried her face in his coat because she couldn't bear to look at him. The hand on her shoulder moved up to caress her hair and finally settled atop her crown.

"Let's play pretend."

The sigh blew over the top of her head. "Okay," he whispered and lay down, bringing her with him. Lolita rolled over onto her back.

"Remember all the endings to those fairytales I've been annoying you with?"

A grunt. "Happy ever after?"

"Yeah. Well..." she stared at the ceiling and knew he was doing the same thing too. The stalactites glistened red with the fire. She sought his hand. He grasped hers. "Believe for a moment they can come true." She waited a few minutes before glancing over. Tasuki's eyes had closed, and he looked relatively calmer.

"An' then what?"

Propping herself up on an elbow, Lolita leaned over, wordlessly pressing her lips to his. _And then this. Forever. That's happily ever after. _

Stirring slowly, Chichiri took a good look at his surroundings. There was not much to see; only sand stretching in all directions, the monotony sometimes punctuated by a battered palm tree. The ground was soft and gritty beneath him. When he glanced down, he saw Ami's unconscious form huddled against him. She was breathing. Satisfied, he fell back. A splash. Chichiri heaved himself up again to drag them out of the giant puddle of floodwater. They were in the middle of nowhere, but at least the rain had stopped.

He reached up to touch his face but mask was gone. The fist thing he felt was the long scar that forever closed his right eye. He pressed a hand over it.

He was able to save her this time, but the expected rush of relief failed to wash over him. The arm that protectively curled around Ami slackened, and Chichiri squeezed his good eye shut. He had saved her – one of the most important people in his new life – and yet he wasn't happy. Holding her, ascertaining her safety, meant nothing to him now.

She wasn't the same. She wasn't the Ami he had painted her to be.

Truth be told, he wasn't sure now he knew her at all.

****

**A/N: All characters and events are fictitious. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not meant by the author. (Because Langley is such a pretty name...)**

**And the secrets are out! Ami has unconsciously (pardon the pun) bared her soul and Chichiri is about to give me another headache (damn angsty monk). All the same, this chapter, flashbacks especially, were fun to write, though I must have changed Ami's mom's lines a dozen times. Tasuki and Lolita weren't originally meant to be in this chapter, but I had a sudden hankering to write fluff, and well...one good couple seems like such an achievement when put side by side the broken one. (ahem...Chichiri...ahem) Whether or not monk-man finds true love is still a mystery...just like that one last little secret I've got up my sleeve. ...Eh? There's one more? I would've supposed you guys have guessed it by now, but if I'm such a terrible foreshadow-er and events suggest-er, then I guess minna-san will have to hang on just a wee bit longer. (peace!)**

**My, my, this has gotten pretty long again. Gomen, but I've missed everyone. I'm on break now, but I can't promise fast chapters since I'm gearing up for a con and am currently tied up with the finishing touches on my costume (read: a lot of work left). Anyhow, I hope you guys enjoyed this little bit. Drop me a line! Say hi or give me a little push. Whatever. Ja mata ne! ;D**


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16: Do Not Meet the Family

Besides the most necessary exchange, Chichiri and Ami had barely spoken to each other since the flood fiasco, which made acting normal impossible at all. Tasuki and Lolita, meanwhile, were striving to rein in their giddy selves, keeping the exchange of furtive glances and goofy smiles to a bare minimum. They couldn't guess what had happened, except that it must have been something acutely unpleasant; and they were not sure they wanted to know. The morning after the storm, their group of four had found each other wandering on the beach, and then by unspoken consensus gone up to the cliff-top villa to retrieve their belongings.

"Sorry for skiving and leaving you and Ami with all the work before," apologized Lolita sheepishly as she paused by Chichiri, arms loaded with their things. She and Tasuki had agreed that leaving the flood-ravaged area as soon as possible would be best for Chichiri's mental health, so they ended up spending the whole morning running around transporting luggage.

The monk shook his head, managing a weak smile. "Not at all. I'm glad you and Tasuki have finally come to an understanding...no da."

Lolita thought he looked a little hurt. _No; wistful was more like it. _

Unexpectedly, he brought a hand up to cup her cheek. Lolita jerked away at the touch, startled. His ghost of a smile faded, replaced by a perplexed frown. "You shouldn't be tiring yourself out, no da." Once again, he moved to touch her. She sidestepped him, heart stammering like her words.

"I – I'm fine. We have to get moving, huh? Because you know –"

_Could he tell? When he touched her, did he feel her life force slipping away?_

"– this village is no fun, all wet and stuff. And, well...Tasuki...Tasuki's village is up ahead. Or so he said..."

_She wanted to drop everything and go back to the cave and sit in the water and wait for Tasuki to catch up and hide there forever and never let anybody know she was dying..._

"...So do you think we can go? Stop by Tas' place, I mean. I keep hearing about his family and it's gotten me curious. Do think we could?"

"Yes; why don't we, no da?"

"Really? We're...we're going?" It hurt her to see the longing expression that slipped through his mask. Chichiri probably didn't want that to happen.

A nod and a tight grin. "If you say so."

Chichiri looked like a man whose world had come crashing down before his very eyes. Lolita saw his gaze straying to Ami, who was feeding their horses while listlessly listening to Yamamoto-san's errand boy blather on about how happy he was that they all made it through the storm okay.

When he stood unspeaking for a whole minute she felt she should say something. "Chichiri, don't tell me I shouldn't be worried."

His head snapped around then, and for a fleeting second Lolita saw his eyes widen. "You shouldn't. No da." Of its own volition, his gaze travelled back to Ami. "At least, not about me."

"Do I want to know what happened yesterday?"

He inwardly snorted at her casual use of the word 'yesterday', as if the event were nothing more than a silly little lovers' spat. He shook his head. "No; you do not want to know."

"That bad, huh?"

These were the times when he thanked the gods for Lolita's incorrigible obliviousness. "Well, do I want to know what you were up to yesterday?" he retaliated, firing her own question back at her.

Lolita flushed from her toes to the top of her head. "No!" Her head shook violently. "No! You do _not_ want to know."

"Ah. I thought so, no da." Smug, Chichiri leaned back, grinning at her narrowed eyes. "Run along, now, Tasuki's waiting."

She threw him one last nasty look and then trotted away.

As he watched her go he wondered why he had never before tried to appreciate her simplicity; her innocence. When he saw Tasuki casually slide his arm around her shoulders, saw her automatically lean into him and beam up at him, he had to swallow the choking feeling building up in his throat and look away down at his empty hands. It had been so, so foolish of him to push away the opportunity for happiness when it dropped into his lap.

But that was a ridiculous thought now. Jealousy was out of the question.

Whirling away from the scene, Chichiri found himself facing Ami, who was, to her credit, endeavouring to appear interested in the errand boy's conversation. Their eyes briefly met. He offered a silent nod, and then tried to find something to do elsewhere.

Though he couldn't be jealous, he could be irritated.

And he was very irritated then. At whom, he just wasn't sure yet.

Tasuki knew he couldn't have heard her right.

"Ya said _what_ an' Chiri said _what_?" he demanded, face screwed up in confusion.

"I said I wanted to see your oh-so-famous family and he said 'if you say so'," Lolita replied, concentrating on adjusting a saddle strap. Giving one last almighty yank, she dusted her hands, smirked down at her handiwork, said, "Awesome," and turned to grin at Tasuki. Instead, she jumped at the intense glare he gave her across the mishmash of packs strapped across their horse's back.

"Ya can't be serious," he exhaled in one puff, completely flabbergasted.

"I am. Very serious." A series of curious blinks met his dull gaze.

"Lo, no. How could ya do this ta me?" His shoulders sagged. "Ya can't want ta meet my family. That's guaranteed ta end in a major disaster!"

"Disaster...wow, big word."

He glowered. "Go ta Chiri an' take back whatever ya said. Now."

"No." A pout and crossed arms. "My mom said it was right and proper to meet the family, especially now that we're...together." Warm pink stained her cheeks. Unfolding her arms, she leaned over the horse at him. "So we're going. And I'll say hello your family and they'll help me get to know you better."

"Ya wanna know me better, don't go ta sleep ta'night," he muttered.

"I want to hear all about when you weren't Genrou or Tasuki yet."

He grumbled incomprehensibly.

"Oh, you're eager to go, too?" her grin turned impish. "Well that's just dandy!"

"I said, 'Don't ya get ta be tattled on, too?'" he repeated, louder and more irritably than he meant to sound.

Lolita thought for a moment. "If you ever came to my world I'd introduce you to my mom and dad."

"Really?" he said, forgetting to be annoyed.

"Sure! They'd be –" Abruptly she stopped, both hands pressed to her face. Tasuki was beside her in an instant. "It's just a bit of dizziness," she replied to his concerned question. "I'll be fine in a minute."

He held her, gazing anxiously at the bowed head resting against his chest. Neither of them spoke until a small voice said, "Let's...let's not talk about my world anymore. Not ever again."

"What d'ya want ta talk about, then?"

"About...us. And the future. Is that okay?"

He wouldn't admit it, but if there was anything he wanted to avoid talking about, it was the future. The grey unknown that loomed over the certain present had never been to his taste. The future was when dreams got broken, when things went wrong and...when people got torn apart. In truth, he was rather afraid of the future. His future, especially. He was so sure it was empty.

But when she asked to talk about that dreaded future, he found it impossible to refuse. He simply tightened his hold on her, rested his chin on the top of her head, and nodded.

"It's a'right."

The crunching footsteps came briskly, coming to an abrupt halt beside him. Only moments later, Lolita crouched down on the same bit of fallen log he was sitting on. Tasuki stopped trying to prod the dying embers in the fire pit back to life and grunted,

"Yer up."

"Body clocks's going crazy," she replied, massaging a shoulder. This time, he slid a solicitous gaze over at her.

"Need more sleep? Ya can on th' way."

"And miss seeing your family first thing when you get back home?" Lolita snorted. "No thanks. Besides, I've sorta worked out my new schedule. Terribly annoying as a newborn baby's but I'll manage."

He returned to poking at the sooty remains of last night's fire. "Jus' so ya know, my fam'ly's not th' sweet an' lovin' kind. Throw logs at ya' when yer not lookin'," came the added mutter. Louder, "Make sure ya don't let 'em fool ya inta thinkin' yer safe. Jus' turn yer back an' _wham!_ yer in the ogress' clutches."

"My, Tas, I never knew you for the poetic kind. Such heart-rending narration." Dramatically pressing her hands to her chest, Lolita waited for Tasuki to glare again before erupting into quiet giggles. After all, it was still very early in the morning, and though Chichiri was nowhere to be found, Ami was still asleep.

"Yeah, yeah. Nobody believes th' warnin's till' they b'come th' victims," the bandit sighed, shaking his head at what he believed was dumb innocence. Without warning, Lolita leaned forward and pecked him on the cheek.

"You'll ride with Ami today. And maybe tomorrow, too. And the next day until she and Chichiri have made up again."

A pair of surprised amber eyes met her declaration. "What's wrong with 'Chiri an' Ami?" at which Lolita blew into her bangs and rolled her eyes.

"Duh."

"Huh?"

"Now aren't you just the most observant creature in the world, sweetie," she pulled a pitiful, sugary look that made Tasuki flinch with remembered pain. Switching back to her normal tone, Lolita glanced around her, shifted closer to the bandit and whispered, "Chichiri and Ami have a few things to clear up. It's none of our business what, but as good friends, we need to help them work it out."

Tasuki barked out a derisive laugh. "By separatin' 'em? If I know 'Chiri, stickin' 'em both tageth'r will bring instant peace!"

"It's not peace we're looking for," Lolita explained patiently, "but cordiality. Warm and fuzzy feelings!" A ways from where the bedrolls were spread out, Ami stirred. The couple froze, staring petrified at her like two children caught with mouthfuls of pilfered cookies, and remaining frozen until she shifted, burrowed into the pillow, and fell into quiet sleep once more.

"So. Yeah," Lolita continued in a loud whisper, "we'll switch riding partners for as long as it takes for them to be their old selves around each other again."

"That might be forever!" Tasuki groaned, burying his face into his hands. "You know Chichiri – "

"What about me, no da?" cut in a curiously chipper voice. Tasuki jumped up, pointing an accusing finger at both his friend and Lolita, who had seen Chichiri coming and was shrugging contritely at the startled bandit. "How did you –?"

The monk raised his fish-laden line. "I just came back, no da." To Lolita he offered a fond smile. "Come along. I'll get breakfast ready in a minute, no da."

Tasuki gaped at their renewed familiarity. Before the pair could get out of earshot he blurted out, "Lo, were you serious about –?" at which the said Lo glanced over her shoulder, cut him off with a sly "I'll miss you, too, love," and winked.

His eyebrows met in a frustrated grimace. Stomping back to his smouldering fire pit, Tasuki jabbed at it with renewed vigour. _Damn. _First she gets him to agree to revisit the scene of his worst nightmares, and then she cons him into helping sort out an apparent estrangement about which he understood nothing. _What the hell was next?_

He simply hated it when he let her get her way all the time.

The one thing Tasuki didn't want anyone to ever know was that the very thought of them sent shivers down his spine. Unfortunately, Lolita found out about it and refused let a waking moment go by without painting him the very pretty picture of his family – father, mother, and five sisters – standing all lined up at the front of his childhood home, ready to greet him. Every time she mentioned his family, Tasuki shuddered so violently he could hear his tessen clacking against its sheath.

But of course, like any self-preserving human, he tried to assuage the pain of this vision by imagining that they – mother and sisters, particularly – were lined up before platoon of sharp-shooting archers drafted specifically for executions. Unfortunately, Tasuki could not think of this without the image veering right around. Before his horrified eyes, he saw his mother and his sisters transform into horrible, vicious beasts that tore through the ranks and ripped the men into pieces of bloody jerky.

The image was so likely it'd make him jolt upright in his saddle, forehead dotted with cold sweat, and Lolita's soft chuckles in the background. Tasuki tried glaring at Chichiri for help the first few times, but every attempt was met with a dreamy, bleary sort of disregard so unlike the monk that it bordered on deliberate.

On the upside of things, the mental images kept him from nodding off while atop his not-too-agreeable horse.

Tasuki suspected that because his seishi brother had grown too damn indulgent, Lolita's insistence of them travelling fast was always heeded. The bandit turned to Ami for help, pointing out that delicate young ladies needed proper rest, but the "delicate young lady" he was trying to shove forward merely shook her head and said the sooner they get to town, the more proper their rest could get.

And so it was.

For hours on end they galloped through fields, cantered through meadows, forded glittering streams, and all that other Romantic nonsense Lolita spouted whenever she had the chance. Oh, and rode under the moonlight, too, because apparently, that was indispensable when travelling on steeds.

_Steeds_?

She used to call them "that (insert colour) four-legged animal chewing grass".

Honestly, the more he was with them, the less Tasuki understood women. He mourned ever trying.

In two days instead of the normal five, his town – his own personal hell – came into view over the orange horizon. They conquered the emerald valley, pranced by swaying acres of rice paddies, sped through solemn-faced guards, trotted through drunken crowds of tavern patrons...and got to his house.

It looked the same except that after seven years some of the paint had faded and the rafters looked dustier than he remembered them to be. But everything was quiet. Gone was the usual sound of plates breaking, of sisterly calls and terrified brotherly screams. Even the window on the west side of the house where Tasuki had a few not-too-fond memories of having his head shoved through the lattice, was intact and had not a single splinter.

"Here we are, no da," declared Chichiri cheerfully, dismounting.

"Don't sound like it's a damn tourist attraction," Tasuki muttered, following his friend and then helping Ami down. Reins in one hand, he walked across the front perimeter of his childhood home, peering down its depth into where he remembered the backyard used to be. When he saw nothing but lengths of stone walls, Tasuki heaved a sigh of relief. "It's not th' place." He was halfway up his horse ready to skitter away when the front door opened.

"Shun'u?"

Ever so slowly, Tasuki twisted around. Standing in the doorway was the large, matronly figure of which the stuff of his worst memories was made. Then, and only then, did Tasuki realize that while he was busy reminiscing about the once-open gardens of his old home, Chichiri, goody two-monk-shoes that he was, had gone and knocked on the front door.

"M...m..." His jaw dropped open and then locked in utter shock. He tried to move, to will his limbs into obedience, but found that they remained rooted to the spot and refused to budge. With increasing horror, he watched the matronly figure detach itself from the door and come lumbering towards him with open arms. "N-Nooooo!"

Lolita could only stare wide-eyed while the big bad bandit she was schooled to know dissolved into a pitiful mass of sputters and helpless struggles. Instinct told her to help Tasuki pry himself out of the tangle of female flesh, but her body propelled her into a low bow. "Pleased to meet you, Tasuki's mother-san!"

The said Tasuki's mother-san's eyes glittered at the bowing figure before her. She was about to titter and go off about how her darling Shun'u had really grown up to be a man when a high-pitched voice said,

"Oh my, little brother. Fancy seeing you bring a bride home!"

Everyone whirled around. Leaning casually against the doorframe was a younger woman who looked remarkably like Tasuki...when he wasn't pale with fright. Ball of red ribbon in one hand, she swept down the short flight of steps and right into his face, looking at him this way and that until, apparently satisfied, she strutted towards Lolita, who had straightened up during the confusion and was looking very...well, confused.

"I...um...I'm..."

"Shun-chan's bride, I know," the older woman interrupted. She reached for Lolita, but just before she could lay a finger on the younger girl Tasuki materialized and whipped her to himself.

"Don't touch 'er." His eyes had narrowed into dangerous amber slits as he held her crushed jealously against his left side. He and the woman glared at each other until the latter smirked, tossing the ball of ribbon and catching it deftly.

"Well, well, you've grown up some, Shun-chan, I'll give you that much." Tilting a look at Lolita, "And she's pretty, too. Not bad."

Tasuki muttered something under his breath, but the woman ignored him to smile at the younger girl. "I'm Shun-chan's eldest sister. Call me Eimin." Glancing at the large woman who had greeted Tasuki so enthusiastically and was now hovering around him, "That's our mother. You want to marry Shun-chan, she'll put you through hell first."

Lolita's face drained of colour.

Eimin winked. "His sisters, too. There are five of us."

Her nod was mechanical, devoid of any comprehension. Moving disjointedly, almost like a torn rag doll, Lolita practically let this eldest sister drag her into the house. She stumbled up the steps, through the threshold, and allowed herself to be forced down on a stiff, high-backed chair while Eimin ran off into the recesses of the house, voice trailing behind her,

"Shun-chan's brought a girl home!"

Somewhere down the sunset-lit corridors, several female voices squealed in reply. One voice rose over the rest in an urgent question. "Did he get her pregnant?"

Suddenly filled with foreboding Lolita slumped against the chair, the back of her head knocking against the solid wood. In time to the thrumming of dull pain, the voices outside clashed in alternating loud and soft tones, the loud ones belonging to Tasuki and his mother, the soft ones to Ami and Chichiri, who were attempting, but in a calmer way than his mother, to coax Tasuki into his house. As the sounds grew in increasing volume and violence, both from inside and outside the house, Lolita shrank into her own tiny mental vacuum of silence where only one thought reigned,

_Oh, my god. _

Eimin, Rin'an, Fuyou, and Manka. Sitting before her like a judge's panel, Lolita began to understand why so many failed auditions. She tried to look pleasant, but her face refused to recognize any emotion but nervousness. A quick glance at Tasuki showed that he wasn't all that comfortable either.

She studied his sisters in turn. Eimin, the eldest, a tall, willowy woman who reminded her of femme fatale villains in movies; Rin'an, the serene second sister against whom Tasuki had warned her; Fuyou, the prettiest and also, according to her brother, the second most violent; and Manka, a petite girl with a round, childish face. The last sister appeared from the kitchens with a tray of tea. Aidou, the youngest. She paused to shoot her brother a wicked grin, which died when her eyes set on the girl beside him. Flicking unfriendly eyes up and down Lolita, Aidou wordlessly approached the party, set down the tea things, and plopped on the empty seat beside Eimin.

"Hear yer gettin' married, Old Maid," Tasuki muttered tonelessly. Aidou almost got up to deal him one, but changed her mind at the last minute.

"That's right. And I was thinking..." Tasuki didn't trust the way she was looking at Lolita, who she didn't make a secret of disliking. "...In preparation for your own wedding, your bride-to-be should learn a few tricks, ne?"

"I don't know what yer blabberin' about, Old Maid," the bandit seishi growled. "Lo ain't got ta learn anythin'. 'Specially not from you."

Shrugging, she turned to her second sister, the one Tasuki had branded as "Th' Nitpicker". "Rin'an-nee, how could we let Shun'u go with a woman who can't be a good wife?"

Surprising herself and her friends Lolita blurted out, "I can too be a good wife!" At Tasuki's strange look, her face burned. Tearing her eyes from his, she took to staring at the hands clasped on her lap, muttering, "I can, too."

Manka, who had not spoken at all before, innocently asked, "Can you cook?"

_I can microwave stuff. Does that count?_ "Yes," she replied reluctantly.

"Can you clean?"

_Like, vacuum the carpet and wash the dishes? _"I...I don't know. I wasn't allowed to do that."

Simultaneous raising of eyebrows. The mother sighed. Of all Tasuki's family, excepting perhaps his father, who couldn't have his own opinion, she was kindest towards prospective in-laws. "What did your mother teach you, then, Lolita-chan?"

Ami looked like she knew the right answer, but Lolita couldn't, for the life of her, begin to understand what the former was mouthing. She looked to Chichiri for help, but he couldn't be counted on to help her cheat and only looked distressed for her. Tasuki was worse. His glaring at his indifferent sisters went towards helping nothing.

"My mom...um..."

_Young ladies should learn how to play an instrument..._

Her eyes lit up. Finally. Finally, she could thank her mother for something. "She sent me to music school so I could learn to play the piano. I know how to play the violin, too!"

_A proper young lady knows how to carry herself..._

"And...um...she taught me how to pick clothes, so that you know, you don't look like a drag queen at Oscars. And how to put on make-up so people will focus on charity in Charity balls instead of snicker at your colourful face behind your back..."

"...She made me go to modelling school so I'd 'know how to walk'. Like I ever learned anything..."

"...My mom said you should never drop your best smile when cameras are around, because then you might find a horrible shot of yourself in the society pages..."

"...Cut tags off new clothes before sticking them in the closet. It's a fashion faux pas to be sporting them in public..."

"...Apparently you eat with evening gloves on. That's disgusting, if you ask me..."

The more words tumbled out of her mouth, the less Lolita knew what she was saying. She only wanted to assuage the desperate hammering of her heart, to prove to herself and to Tasuki's family that she was right for him. She talked and talked, pulling random quotes so fast she couldn't remember exactly whether they came from her mother or from the etiquette book she was forced to learn by heart.

Tasuki laid a hand on her arm. "Stop."

Instantly she fell silent, blinking at the scene before her as if just waking up from a horrible dream. Tasuki's family was staring at her, their faces unreadable.

"What did I say?"

"Plenty a' things," he sighed.

"Normal things or beyond normal things?"

Before he could reply, his mother cleared her throat. Everybody looked at her. "Lolita-chan," she began, "you have many things to learn."

Tasuki jumped up in protest "She doesn't haf'ta –!" but was cut off by a thoughtful Eimin.

"She could start by helping in the preparations for Aidou's wedding."

"And then she could learn how to do housework."

"Yer not hirin' a servant girl –!"

"We could teach her how to cook for an army," Manka giggled, "because Shun-chan eats like that!"

Tasuki blushed. "Will ya all shut –"

"If it's Shun-chan, then she'll have to learn to sew, too! He's bound to constantly need new clothes, playing bandit like that," offered Fuyu.

"I _am_ a bandit!"

"And we'll definitely have to teach her how to handle him!" Aidou declared. The sisters huddled together, giggling amongst themselves and making plans. Realizing that no one was about to listen to him, Tasuki pulled Lolita to her feet. He was about to stalk out when Manka caught him out of the corner of her eye. She grabbed Lolita, shoving the girl behind her back and within the circle of her sisters.

"She's ours now, Shun-chan. You can go out and play."

Tasuki began to say something, but stopped at Lolita's reassuring smile. "Go on," she said, "I'll be all right."

He looked reluctant. "Don't overwork, 'er."

Rin'an rolled her eyes. "She'll get the chance when you two marry." Without waiting to hear her brother's stuttered reply, she herded her sisters out of the living room. Desperate, Tasuki turned to his last ray of hope, who he wouldn't have chosen as a last ray of hope had he another choice.

"Look," he said to his mother, "I know yer all crazy 'bout these "in-law tests" an' stuff, but Lo's not like th' rest a' them. She aint used ta housework an' she still needs ta be taken care of..."

"If she really wants to marry you, Shun'u," his mother replied, "she'll do anything."

"That's th' problem!" He fairly yelled, frustrated. "That idiot'll keep goin and goin 'till she drops dead!"

Chichiri flinched at his choice of words while Ami looked in the direction Tasuki's sisters had disappeared with their captive.

In response to her son's outburst, the bandit seishi's mother only gave a thin smile. "Let us hope not."

Later that night the girls sat up in bed, Ami trying to be sympathetic as Lolita dipped her torn hands into a basin of cold water. Tasuki's sisters had chosen the afternoon of their arrival to scrub the house clean and unanimously voted to draft their little brother's "bride".

"Shouldn't you be asleep now?" Ami asked, stifling a yawn. Tasuki had poked his head in ten minutes ago, asking after Lolita, who looked ready to doze off during dinner.

"I should," she replied, "but I'm too tired to."

"Isn't that a paradox?" reaching over to the foot of her bed, Ami retrieved a towel, wincing when she saw the hundreds of tiny cuts on her roommate's palms. "I don't think you can run around housewife-ing tomorrow."

"It won't stop me," Lolita replied, hissing in pain when she slathered ointment on her hands. "Gotta show Tas I can make it."

"I don't think he really cares whether or not you can perfectly fold a dumpling or scour the house. He'll marry you, either way."

Lolita smiled at her comment. "You know...until today, we've never talked about...getting married."

Ami started. "He never proposed?"

"Nope."

"You didn't seem to mind that he lets his family believe otherwise."

Another shake of the head. "I don't." Lolita let out a long breath. "Tasuki...only wants to protect me. He thinks his mother and his sisters will go easy if he makes it clear that he will marry me no matter what they think." She chuckled. "He's funny."

Three soft raps interrupted the girls, and a moment later Chichiri poked his head in.

"May I come in, no da?"

A brief glance at Ami showed that she didn't appear to care too much. "Sure."

He didn't shut the door, instantly striding across the small room to Lolita's bed. Gently taking her wrists, he turned her hands over. The cuts were raw from the sting of the ointment and looked worse than they really were.

"So that's why Tasuki was so mad," he sighed. "I'll fill in for you tomorrow, no da."

"What?" Lolita disengaged her hands from his. "Thank you, but no thank you. I can manage."

Chichiri was about to start reasoning with her but seeing her resolute look settled for a little frown instead. "You really shouldn't. But get some sleep if you insist. I'll see you tomorrow morning, no da."

"Goodnight, Chichiri."

"Good night, Lolita-chan. Ami...san." With a final nod, he turned and left the room.

Lolita peeled her eyes from the closed door and raised an eyebrow at the other girl.

A shrug.

"Look, whatever's going on between you two, it's pretty serious, isn't it?"

"Making mountains out of molehills only give you additional headaches. And poking one's nose where it shouldn't be hasn't gotten anyone any good," replied Ami in a singsong voice, throwing out the cold water.

"But talking about it usually helps."

"I _don't_ want to talk about it," she almost snapped, getting into bed. "You're here to impress Tasuki's family. Focus on that. I'll deal with whatever's bothering me myself." Slipping under the covers, she turned over, facing the wall and away from her roommate.

"But..."

"Go to sleep when you're done. Don't forget to blow out the lamp."

Lolita could only nod. She had never quite seen Ami this serious. Tying off the last of her bandages, she returned the rest of the roll onto the only dresser in the room, and got into her bed. Sparing a last worried look at the other girl, who she knew was faking sleep, she blew out the bedside lamp and settled into the darkness.

Ami and Chichiri.

Ami...

Chichiri...

What on earth could have happened?

She stared at the ceiling. When that didn't help, she took to staring out the window over Ami's bed. The only view outside was the back wall surrounding someone else's house. Giving up, Lolita rolled over onto her back and resumed her study of the ceiling. It was hard to see much beyond the heavy shadows. Finally, she forced her eyes shut, running the question of what had happened between her friends over and over in her head.

That night, sleep took very long to come.

****

**A/N: Hao, minna! I don't know whether this chapter's been serious or not. At first I thought I'd stick in Tasuki's family for comic relief (god knows there's been too much drama lately) but then I thought about it and realized that I could turn their presence into something more important. :3 What that is, is coming. :)**

**From now on, updates will be pretty irregular, from once a month or more often or less often. It really depends on how much time I've got and how driven I am. (So please review! They are brain food, I swear.) I've got the ending worked out (eh? But this fic doesn't have a plot...o.O) though so rest assured that I'll see this through to the very last scene (I've jotted that down in my head, too! XD). Advance happy Christmas minna-san!**

**Ja mata ne!**


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17: Messes are Very Easy to Make

"Oh my, you're not doing anything! Nobody gets to do nothing around here!" Rin'an was moving almost as fast as her mouth was talking. She had an armload of fabric and a wooden food container dangling from an arm, and was clutching some rags in the other. "Can't have Mama seeing you idle!" So saying, she dropped the bundle of rags into Lolita's lap. "Shun-chan's room needs tidying up. I swear, that boy is the messiest, most disorganized person..." the rest of her rant trailed away with her.

Lolita looked from the rags to her poor hands, sighed, and hauled herself up. The family had been up even before dawn, running to and fro with odd chores that needed immediate attending.

It was the day before Aidou's wedding.

And she was sleepy. Chichiri had offered to take over her morning duties, which she gladly turned over in favour of more nap time. But she had hardly been asleep for half an hour then a godawful banging reverberated through the house, followed by a long, shrill, child's scream. Footsteps came pounding after the battle cry; footsteps that charged into her room and jumped right on top of her.

After that, she didn't even dare think of skiving.

As Lolita proceeded down the hall where Tasuki's second sister indicated his room was, it suddenly came into her mind that she had never seen his room before. Oh, Tasuki had obviously seen the guest room she and Ami slept in, popping in every night as he was wont to do, to check on her.

Ever since they came to stay with his family, those nocturnal visits were the only time they had in each other's company. But they never lasted. Lolita often wanted to sneak out into the dozing town to be alone with her bandit, but every time she proposed the idea, he always had to reject it. So each evening meeting ended with a swift kiss goodnight and a last longing look just before Ami came in.

Now she was going to cross the threshold into forbidden territory. Or almost forbidden territory. A mess of giddy excitement and nerves, she found herself standing grinning at the door for a whole minute before finally pushing it open.

It swung in.

Lolita had a sudden compulsion to laugh. Or maybe cry. Tasuki's room looked like a five-year old on a sugar high happened to it. In one corner was his unmade bed, the chair beside it looking less like a chair and more like a clothes pile. The drawers of a chest were all pulled open, their freshly wrinkled contents spilling out. Out of an armoire tumbled childhood memorabilia. Everything was topsy-turvy. The only clean place was the corner where Chichiri's cot stood, pristinely made, his staff leaning against the wall at the foot of the bed, marking out a perfect, spotless little territory.

It was heaven compressed, shoved into a protective bubble, and thrown into the heart of hell.

Thinking back, Lolita realized that maybe the culprit was Tasuki's five-year-old look-alike nephew. She was almost sure she saw smudges of candy on his fingers.

Nevertheless, it was time to get to work. Figuratively rolling up her sleeves, she attacked the bed, tucking and smoothing everything back into place. She was plumping pillows and was about to throw the coverlet over her masterpiece when the wave of exhaustion she had been pushing away for so long came over her. One minute her vision emptied into total blackness; the next, she was sprawled on the bed, waiting for the weak feeling to pass. Shutting her eyes, Lolita tucked herself into a ball, forcing herself to suck in deep lungfuls of air. She was beginning to feel better when the door banged open.

"What a nice surprise," came the teasing drawl. It wasn't very hard to imagine the accompanying smirk.

"Tasuki." She didn't even crack an eye. She didn't move; just lay there coaxing her jagged breaths back to normal. Catching on fast, he was instantly by her side. "I'm okay," she mumbled, forcing herself to look at him. "Everything's under control."

He growled. "Go to sleep. I'll cover fer ya."

"I only need a minute." Rolling over onto her back, Lolita took one last deep breath, shoved away the lingering faintness, and pushed herself upright. The world spun, but righted itself quickly. "Okay. Back to work."

For the first time, Tasuki took a clear look at his room. His face changed from surprised to annoyed to mortified. "They made ya clean my room?"

"I don't mind."

"Well, I do." Irately muttering to himself, he plodded through the mess to begin putting things back in their proper order. Lolita caught snatches of "that little brat takes perfectly after his mother" and giggled.

"Here I was thinking what a little boy you were to leave your room in such shambles."

He paused to throw her a smug look. "Ya think too little 'a me."

"Nah. My room looks like this, too," She stood up to join him, choosing to commandeer the open armoire. "But worse. Mommy will probably be happy when I get home knowing how to keep my room tidy," she said without thinking.

Tasuki froze.

When the words sank in, Lolita too, stopped. "S-sorry."

"Do ya...miss home?"

Shaking her head, she said in a small voice, "I can't seem to keep it out of my head. It comes even when I'm not consciously trying to remember it."

"I'd think 'bout Konan too if I were away," came the nonchalant reply. He just had to try to lighten her up.

She smiled and returned to sorting through a jumble of childhood memorabilia. "I can imagine."

Leaving his work, Tasuki went over and sat down beside her. Lolita was smoothing several sheets of crumpled paper together. Recognizing the black scrawls, he suddenly grabbed them out of her hands, face flushed.

"Are you okay?" she asked, eyebrows raised.

"F-ferget these. Too dusty."

Shrugging, she reached into the pile, retrieving a bundle of copper coins all strung together. Tasuki's eyes lit up. "Hey! An' I thought Manka-nee took these ta buy 'kaa-san's birthday present." Looking sheepish, "Had a row 'bout it, too. Screamed at each other all day."

"So did you ever get to buy your mother a present?"

The look he gave her spoke tons. "'Kaa-san? If I bought 'er a birthday present all those years ago, I wouldn't be 'ere now!"

"That bad at picking presents, huh?"

He snickered. "Hell no. Ma'd smother me for joy. Never bought 'er a present after th' first time." He shook his head. "Was a miracle I made it out alive." Then a thought occurred to him. "I never did ask you when yer birthday was, did I?"

"It's long over," she said mildly, putting away old toys.

"How old are you?" he persisted.

"Eighteen."

"Oh." He sat in thought before saying, awkwardly, "Yer parents...must've found somebody fer ya."

Unexpectedly, Lolita snickered. "Sure they have," she replied, tone derisive. "Plently. I hate them all."

"But yer gonna hafta marry one a' them."

"That'll be the day," she scoffed.

He felt strangely content watching her tidy up. It was so mundane, so much like something a bride would do – a real bride. Tasuki felt his face warm as a corner of his mouth tilted in a lopsided grin. Well, it was something to think about.

"...forty-eight...forty-nine...fifty!" A clatter of wood upon wood finished the session. Lugging another big food basket towards herself, Ami was beginning to fill it with the assorted cakes spread out on the table before them when she glanced up at the bride-to-be.

The cutout of twin characters for joy hung limp from Aidou's hands. A pile sat on the table, untouched. She was supposed to stick them onto each and every little thing she would be bringing to her future husband's house, but the chests and stacks of boxes around her simply went ignored.

"Aidou-san? What's the matter?"

The girl blinked out of her reverie, shaking her head and sheepishly smiling at Ami. Grabbing the closest box, she haphazardly smoothed the paper cutout onto it and reached for another.

"One cutout per box, remember?"

Again, Aidou blinked at the flimsy red paper in her hands. She was about to stick it onto the same box. "I...I guess I'm a little distracted," she admitted with a nervous laugh.

"I'll say."

The girls continued working in silence until the bride-to-be murmured, "Marriage must be so weird."

"But _you're_ getting married."

"I know, right?" When she laughed again, it sounded uncertain. "And I have no idea what's going to happen."

"All sorts of great things are going to happen! You could start a family, for one!"

"_This_ is my family." She shook her head. "I'm not supposed to leave them." Frustrated, she tossed the box back onto the table, upsetting the heap of paper cutouts. "All my sisters have gone and married. If I leave, too, who's going to take care of Mama and 'Tousan? Shun'u's always running off on his own, thinking it's so cool to play bad boy. And now he's gone and gotten himself a girl!"

Ami thought she was beginning to understand. Conspiratorially leaning forward she asked, "Do you wish you could run off like Tasuki, too?"

She got an incredulous look. Aidou was beginning to form an "of course not" but her expression changed at the last second and she grinned. "Yeah. Sometimes I do."

"But you never got the chance."

"I never _chose_ to," she corrected, looking nostalgic. "I can't. I can't make myself just up and go. I'd...I'd miss them. All of them. Even that cocky little brother of mine," she spat out rather fondly. "He never thinks! What does he suppose he's doing, disappearing for years and then coming back home, girl in tow? It's so irresponsible!"

"People in love tend to do irresponsible things."

Aidou's eyes widened and she sat up straighter. "So he _did_ get her pregnant!"

"No!" Ami laughed. "I didn't mean it that way. But Tasuki's sure different when he's around her."

"That's because she expects him to protect her all the time. As if we're a family of monsters," Aidou muttered, none too pleased. Retrieving a sorry piece of red cutout, she slapped it on a nearby cosmetics box. Ami returned to aligning sweets into the first layer of the second basket.

"You know Lolita doesn't think of you guys like that. Besides," pausing to admire the herd of sweet bun rabbits, "they're in love. We're not supposed to understand them."

"What a shame. It's surprisingly easy to read young couples," interrupted a titter. The girls turned to see Tasuki's mother coming in to inspect their work. She nodded at Ami's approvingly, but frowned a little at her daughter's less-than-necessarily-neat paper cutout branding.

"Ai-chan, I'd like to speak to you and Lolita-chan before supper. I'll meet you both in my room."

Chichiri didn't need to turn around to know that Lolita had been standing at the entrance to the stable for a while now. He tried to scan her chi for a clue as to why she had come, but couldn't read anything. She waited quietly, wordlessly, not speaking until he wiped the final bit of dust off the top of the red wedding palanquin, dropped the rag into a nearby bucket and said,

"Can I help you, no da?"

He felt her smile. "Funny. I came hoping _I_ could help _you_."

"Oh?" Quirking an eyebrow, he finally turned around. She pushed the little gate open, took a deep breath and cocked her head.

"Smells like hay."

"It's a stable, no da," he chuckled.

"Remember the last time we were in one?"

"The one and only time, not counting this one?"

"Back then," she began, but cut herself off with a laugh and a shake of the head. "No, no. That's not right." When she looked up again, Chichiri sensed a growing sombreness in her aura. His eyes followed her as she leaned over a stall to pat the horse's nose. "I still can't ride. Not by myself, anyway."

"You're doing better, no da."

"That's a good thing."

"It is," he agreed, not sure where the conversation was going.

"Hey...Chichiri, we're friends, right?"

He nodded.

"Do you care about me?"

A tiny frown creased his masked face. What was she going on about? "Of course, no da. I care about everybody."

She shrugged. "Would you still care about me if you knew I had secrets?"

"Everybody has secrets."

"Bad ones?"

Ahh... He was beginning to see what she was getting at. Chichiri internally flinched at the pointed look she gave him. It was a question he had been hoping he wouldn't ever need to answer. "Bad secrets...exist too...no da."

"Would you still care about me if I told you I kept some very bad secrets?"

"Lolita-chan, what could you possibly..." The words died as he realized that that was the exact same thing he had been thinking about Ami before she...disappointed him. "I don't want to talk about it." Then he marched back to busy himself with scrubbing the spotless palanquin, determined to ignore her. In the ensuing silence, they heard a female voice call for Lolita.

"It's Aidou."

"I know. We were supposed to finish packing up her trosseau."

"You should get going then. It's almost sunset. No da."

Unexpectedly, she crouched down beside him. When she a hand to his face, her fingers lingered near the edge of his mask. "May I?"

Sighing, Chichiri slipped the mask off. He never gave her a glance until he felt gentle fingers near where the scar tore across his face. He jumped, making he withdraw instantly. But when they locked eyes, she smiled, a bittersweet gesture.

"I'm afraid to touch it. I never know what you'll do. Even then, I still care about you. You're my friend, Chichiri. I'll always care."

"Lolita! Mama wants you!" echoed in the background.

"That's my cue," she shrugged, pushing up from her knees. "Exit, stage left!"

"Lolita-chan!" he caught at her wrist. She turned, looking at the monk's maskless face. The expression was harsher than she was used to. "It isn't that easy...to accept somebody. You can't – you can't just decide to do it and expect to feel right about it!"

"But you've been doing just that all your life. All your second life." The darkening backlight shadows kept him from seeing the soft tint spreading across her cheeks. "That's why I liked you the first time." Then her hand slipped out of his grasp.

As soon as she was out of the stables he stood, watching her break into a jog towards an impatient Aidou.

How different she seemed. How quickly she could switch from one persona into another in a matter of seconds. How, when he really stopped to think about it, very like him she was.

Ami was reading from a checklist she had propped up on the bundle of red garments in her arms when she caught sight of Tasuki, skulking very much like a bandit around his mother's room.

"What's up?" she very innocently asked, coming up from behind him. Caught unaware, the bandit jumped, whirling on her with a finger stuck to his mouth.

"Ssh!" Casting furtive glances, he pulled her a little way down the hall and whispered, "If my sisters see me sneakin' 'round eavesdroppin', I'll be in a ton 'a trouble!"

"Eavesdropping? On whom?"

"My mother," he rolled his eyes. "An' my sister...th' one who ain't gonna be an old maid startin' tamorrow."

"What makes _you_ so interested?" she cocked an eyebrow.

Tasuki grew visibly uncomfortable. "They're talkin' about...stuff. Weddin' stuff, mostly. I wanna hear."

"That's something new."

"Lo's inside, too."

"Ahh," the girl grinned, shifting the bundle of clothes higher up her arms. She began to trot away. "Happy listening, then."

"Where are ya goin'? Don't ya wanna hear what they have ta say?"

"Not as much as you, Tasuki," Ami replied with a wicked grin. "Don't let your sisters catch you!"

Visibly reddening, the bandit caught up to her and roughly grabbed the clothes away. "Where to?" he muttered, eyes averted.

"Aidou-san's room."

Although grumbling about having to enter the realms of hell and hoping to come back alive, he trotted after Ami, anyway. She held the door open as he stumbled in, thankfully dumping the layers of red fabric onto his sister's bed.

Tasuki had never been in Aidou's room ever since he ran away. His final visit was the last straw that made him jump ship to join the Reikaku bandits. Now, looking around, it seemed to him more like a girl's room and less like the torture chamber of bygone years. Almost.

If anything, all the redness nearly blinded him. On the walls were gold-printed charms written over with flowing red calligraphy; the windows were swathed in yards of red ribbon. A red-lacquered travelling chest stood at the foot of the bed, ready for transport to his fifth brother-in-law's house along with the enormous pair of black-and-red food containers. Even the bed was spread with red sheets, and every last surface had been imprinted with the 'double happiness' symbol.

He stared, almost flabbergasted by the change. "Weddin's are so much work."

"You almost forget what it's really for," agreed Ami, busying herself with laying out the complicated layers of the traditional wedding dress.

"No, ya don't," said Tasuki, arms folded as he continued to survey all the wedding paraphernalia. "When ya start wakin' up every mornin' rememberin' there's in-laws ta please, ya never ferget th' essence 'a weddin's."

With a secret smile Ami replied, "I wonder if you'd still think like that when you and Lolita marry."

He whirled on her looking like he was going to spit out a sharp rejoinder. But the blush took over his face faster and Tasuki found himself stumbling for words. Realizing that he was making a fool of himself, he returned to staring out the window, arms folded across his chest. "I've never asked 'er."

"She told me," his companion serenely replied, never looking up from her work.

"She...she ain't mad?"

"What could she be upset over?"

"In front of my family we – I – I act like we're engaged'r somethin' when I never really even asked 'er yet." He looked at her over his shoulder. "Shouldn't she be upset?"

Ami paused to smile back up. "She's not."

"Do ya think..." Tasuki caught himself before he could go any farther. What the hell was he doing telling Ami all about his love dilemmas? Covering his embarrassment with a little cough, he made for the door. "I should...go. Got stuff ta do, yeah. Old maid's weddin's tamorrow. Busy."

"I think you'll have enough time to catch the last of the secret meeting," she winked.

He barked a stuttering laugh. "Y-yeah. Like I said: busy," and scooted out the door as quickly as affected dignity would let him.

Tasuki never looked back at the room he had just left. When he passed his mother's room, the doors were still closed. Hushed voices drifted from inside it. He deliberated between walking away and living with the curiosity or satisfying that same curiosity and, quite possibly, be executed upon discovery. Weighing the options, he decided that living uninformed would be more unbearable, and making sure that coast was clear, edged towards the door.

"I will love him, Mama!" It was Aidou's voice. Tasuki almost flinched at the vehemence of it.

"But it will be a different kind of love, dear," his mother's voice followed.

"Not everyone gets to live a romantic life," the younger girl said. Tasuki could almost imagine her shooting a meaningful glance at Lolita. "I don't believe in the kind of love they write about in the books," her voice lost its edge as she continued, "but some people do. So I'm happy to marry someone I've met only twice if it means Shun-chan won't have to worry about supporting Mama and 'Tousan in the future!"

Tasuki sucked in his breath.

"I know I'm a crick in his neck and I know I annoy him no end. But he's still my little brother and I want him to be happy. When he and Lolita-san marry I don't want him to have to think about how he's going to support all of you. He's a part of a legend, and he's played his role well. Shun-chan...should have his chance at a fairy-tale ending, too."

He reeled back. Aidou didn't love her fiancee? Suddenly, words from a long-forgotten memory pushed themselves back into the surface of his mind.

"_You don't have to worry about anything because Aidou nee-sama will fix everything for you. You only need to be happy, Shun-chan."_

It was a long, long time ago, back when they were kids and he could still stand her teasing because somewhere in the back of it all he knew his older sister cared for him. The day she told him that they were walking home after she scared away the neighbourhood kids who came to pick on him. He was constantly teased for his strange hair colour, but nobody bothered him when Aidou was around.

To think he had almost...forgotten that.

Tasuki snapped out of his reverie in time to dodge the swinging door. A surprised Aidou stood in the doorway, though her surprise very quickly morphed into a queer mix of embarrassed annoyance. "You really shouldn't let me catch you eavesdropping, you know?"

"I...I wasn't..." he parried weakly. Rolling her eyes, she strode towards her room. Tasuki watched his sister go, unsure what he should do. But his legs moved of their own accord and he found himself jogging to catch up to her.

"Hey!"

She ignored him.

"I heard what ya said!" Reaching out, he laid a hand on her shoulder. "Nee-san!"

Aidou stopped, her back ramrod straight. Very slowly, she turned around.

"N-nee-san..." Tasuki repeated, albeit a little more quietly. "You don't have to..."

She smiled. He hadn't seen such an honest smile from her for the longest time. It was the kind that didn't send frightened shivers down his spine, working instead to make him feel guilty. Patting his hand, "I can fend for myself. You only need to be happy, Shun-chan."

Everybody had gone to the wedding reception at the groom's place. Except for Tasuki and Lolita, the Kou residence was completely deserted. It was also very dark, but for the solitary lamp flickering in the bandit seishi's bedroom. The said bandit seishi himself was slumped in a chair, absently staring out the window. The night sky flashed with bursts of colour. Fireworks. A morose smirk tugged up one corner of his mouth. Aidou's husband was the son of a filthy rich merchant desperate for grandchildren.

He knew the family; everybody in town did. But it felt rather wrong for his sister to give herself up to them without a fight. For him, she implied. She was doing it all for him.

Tasuki felt like a useless jerk.

A soft shuffling stirred him from self-pitying thoughts. He glanced up to see Lolita lying on her side, watching him. With a tired smile he got up and sat on the edge of the bed beside her.

"Hey, you. Sleep well?"

"What's with the glum face?"

"Old maid's married," he sighed. "Finally."

She pushed herself upright. "Shouldn't you be happy?"

"Yeah..."

"But you don't look it."

"I don't," he repeated, catching the hand straying to touch his face. Tasuki brought it to his lips. "I haven't been man enough. Nothin' I ever learned in Reikaku made me man enough."

"You're still thinking about what Aidou-san said, aren't you?"

"She's always been the worst 'a that gang a' tomboys I call my sisters," he chuckled to himself. "Never cared about learning ta be a wife – heck, she never acted like a girl as far as I was concerned! Picked on me all th' time. I always told 'er I hated 'er..." He paused, absently stroking the back of Lolita's hand while he thought. "Didn't know she'd been lookin' out fer me all this time."

"She wants you to be happy. I wish you would, too."

"Only one thing would make me happy," he murmured, closing the gap between them, brushing her half-open mouth with his. "I've been thinkin' about it fer a while. Stay with me, Lo. Marry me."

****

**A/N: Just a tidbit on Chinese weddings (based on actual observation and not necessarily researched information):**

**Because traditional Chinese weddings were arranged, the bride and the groom usually only meet twice before their actual wedding – one during the introductions by the matchmaker, and a second time during the engagement parties. These events don't have too much activity except for the exchange of gifts between the families of the bride and groom, more or less symbolizing their acceptance of each other. Gifts usually included bolts of cloth (items of clothing now that we're in the RTW era), jewelry, and lots and lots of sweet food, which are placed in huge food baskets, which look sort of like round, stacked lunch boxes with a handle. Everything was papered over with cutouts of twin Chinese characters for happiness. What couldn't be papered over were stamped with them, right down to the teacups and bowls used by the prospective bride and groom when they take turns serving tea and noodles to each other's relatives. **

**The wedding palanquin. Obviously, that's not used nowadays, but way back when, the groom would lead a procession to the bride's house (wearing his shocking-red outfit topped off by a giant ball of red ribbon – hence Eimin's ribbon ball in the previous chapter, though I'm not sure whether the bride's family or the groom's makes it -.-") walking (or riding) in front of the wedding palanquin (don't ask why Chichiri ended up polishing it) to fetch his bride. **

**The actual wedding takes place in the morning, followed by a reception in the groom's house. The visitors then go to look at the bride's dowry, which is usually laid out in her room, before it is all taken to the groom's house, where they will spend their first night. **

**Thus ends our culture lesson. :) See you guys at the next chapter!**


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18: Acceptance Dulls Anger

She drew back with a startled gasp. Tasuki blinked at her, hurt and confused. Hurriedly, Lolita threw her arms around his waist. Her words were muffled, face buried in his back, but he could clearly make out every single word.

"No; I can't."

~010101~

While Aidou's parents stayed with her new in-laws and her sisters went their separate ways back to their own homes, Chichiri and Ami found themselves making polite excuses to go back to the Kou residence.

"I'm sure Tasuki and Lolita will be fine by themselves," the bride smirked, remembering her brother's earlier stubborn decision to stay and watch over his girl.

"That's what we're afraid of," Ami mumbled.

Mrs. Kou laughed. "I never took you for the prudish type, dear; nothing said about Chichiri-san, though." The said Chichiri-san blushed a faint red. "But all right. You two go on back. Shun'u should still be up to let you in."

Bowing and saying their good-byes, the pair offered a last congratulatory wish to Aidou and her new husband before setting off down the empty, moonlit road.

It was well past midnight, and once they were fairly out of sight, Ami and Chichiri automatically drifted further apart. Chichiri was trying to look alert, whereas Ami didn't even bother trying and just stared at the ground. They walked in awkward silence, each wishing to be alone, until they got to the bridge that marked the last block to the Kous' place.

Chichiri spoke up. "If you don't mind, Ami-san, maybe you could go on by yourself from here?" Beside him, Ami halted. They were at the crest of the small bridge. She scrutinized him for a moment, but it was impossible to make out his expression in the dark. Reluctantly, she began the trek down.

"Be careful on your way back, then."

_I should be the one saying that,_ Chichiri thought tightly, but offered only a curt nod. He was beginning to turn towards the water when he noticed that she hadn't gone beyond a step or two away from him. In fact, she was watching him intently, looking like she was weighing the pros and cons of a really heavy decision.

"Um...before I go..."

He spared her a lazy glance, something that, used on Lolita, would have made the girl tear up and chicken out. But not Ami. She stood her ground, meeting his uninterested glance with a cool stare of her own. Her hands clenched into fists at her side, Chichiri knew she was just about as uncomfortable as he was. Yet when she spoke, her voice grew bolder with every word.

"There's been something I've been meaning to tell you, Chichiri."

He feigned indifference. "Is it anything important?"

A shrug. "Pretty much, yeah." Looking him straight in the eyes, Ami took a deep breath. Her next words were nothing he expected. "I don't care what you think. Your refusal to accept me isn't worth beating myself up over." Swallowing the tremor in her voice, she offered him a short bow and flounced away.

Chichiri stood rigid, watching her go. His pride stung at her words, though deep down he knew he deserved every last bit of it. When he whirled back towards the river, his knuckles were white from his tight grip on the railings. But had no right to be angry; not after the injustice he had dealt her. He had been, in Tasuki's words, a complete and utter ass.

~010101~

"We both know I'm not going to hold out much longer." The orange glow still danced upon them. His body was tense; hers pressed to his. He did not speak; her voice was barely above a whisper. "When I go, you need to be able to move forward. Marrying you...will not help anything towards that."

He held his breath.

"Please know that I love you. That I will love only you. And even when I'm no longer by your side, I want you to still be able to smile. I want you to keep being happy."

"That ain't fair," he growled, planting his hands over the ones clasped atop his torso. "How can ya ask me ta be happy when yer dead?" the last word came out with a great deal of distaste. "Easy fer ya ta do, maybe, coz then you'll be up where nothin' ever goes wrong. But I'll be stuck here in this hellhole! How can ya ask me ta keep bein' _happy_!" Almost violently, he tore her arms away and whirled around to crush her to himself. No more could he contain the hot tears that spilled down his cheeks. "Ya never think, Lo."

His embrace hurt, but she stayed in it. Tasuki's body trembled under her hands. Seeing him so scared made her scared, too, but she couldn't let him know. He had too much to bear. "Pray for me when I'm gone, okay? Ask Suzaku to stick us together in the next life. And maybe bury me with the doll. Mm...that'd be nice."

"Don't talk about things like that. It's bad luck."

She tried to laugh, but the sound couldn't get past the lump in her throat. Her eyes burned with tears. Lolita blinked fast. She couldn't cry. Not now; not in front of him. "Think of it as my last will. You won't be able to read what I'd write down, and I imagine it'd be pretty embarrassing to have Ami read some of the stuff I'd put in the document."

"Shut up."

"No. I want you to remember the things I'm going to tell you. You're going to be my executor."

"Hell no."

The laugh finally came, choking out with a few stray tears. "It's not what you're thinking. The executor's the person who does the stuff written in the will. So remember my words to the letter." She paused to hear his assent, but none came. "Anyway. It starts like this: I, the undersigned, on this – what's the date?"

"Twenty-first day 'a th' tenth month 'a th' fourth year 'a th' regency of 'Er Majesty th' Dowager Empress Houki."

"Right. That. – Hereby swear that the foregoing are, in full and absolutely true, the contents of my last will and testament, formulated without threat, force, violence, torture, intimidation, or other means that vitiate my free will. Be it so executed by Tasuki."

Sinking into her ridiculous rendition of a last will's introduction, her bandit lover began to relax a little, pulling her onto his lap as she spoke. More and more, it began to sound to him like a rehearsal for a silly little play they were going to be putting on, or a lengthy monologue taken straight out of a daydream. He cradled her, rocking slowly, relishing the feeling of her long locks brushing against his arm.

"To Tasuki, alias Genrou, alias Shun'u alias Shun-chan alias –"

"We get it."

"To Tasuki," she repeated, "I bequeath all my earthly belongings. I want him to have the charcoal pencil I love so much, as well as the purple cutter with stars so he can sharpen it. He'll also own my iPod video, as long as he doesn't go around moping while listening to my confession song over and over when he figures out how to use it." Drawing a shaky breath, she swallowed back a sob and continued, "He can have my backpack, too, and the sketchbook. I don't care what happens to all the other drawings, but there's one I made of you. Please take very good care of it. I put a lot of love into that piece, corny as it may sound.

"To Chichiri and Ami, I apologize for having nothing more to give, but I don't really have anything that's of too much value. Please make up, the both of you. I'd like to see you two on good terms again, even if it has to be on my deathbed."

"That's a vulgar word," Tasuki muttered.

"You swear a lot," she countered in the same low tones. "That's more vulgar. Anyway. Do what you will with my clothes. Just don't go around smelling them all the time. It's weird. Bury me where it's convenient. It's not very polite to make you all drag a dead body around."

He tightened his hold on her.

"And like I said, bury me with the doll. It's the only thing I refuse to give you."

"I'll always think of ya," he promised, his voice husky. "Always."

"But not too much. Just enough for me to be able to have something to brag to the other ghosts about." Shifting slightly, she nuzzled the side of his neck and took a deep breath, willing herself to never forget this scent.

"I hope ya won't die," came the murmur at her ear. "Lo, if ya live..."

"If I live I'll grow very embarrassed over tonight. You'll probably laugh at me, but yeah, I wouldn't mind."

"Is this the end 'a yer will?"

"Oh. I've got to sign it: Love, Lolita."

"I'm not sure yer s'posed ta sign important papers like that."

"Never mind." She sighed. "Tasuki?"

"Hm?"

"What made you ask to marry me now of all times?"

"Aidou-nee. She made me realize what a heel I'd be if I let ya go without makin' things b'tween us clear."

"I'm glad we came to see your family."

"So am I."

The oil burned out. The lamplight flickered, dimmed, and finally extinguished, leaving the lovers in momentary darkness. From out the window, Tasuki could see the first rays of white sunlight creeping out from the distant mountains. He stilled. Lolita had fallen asleep. Shifting her onto the bed, he slipped under the blankets beside her and gathered her to himself. A drowsy arm snaked around his waist in response.

Just a couple of hours. And then he'd be more willing to get up and help around the house.

~010101~

It was noon before Chichiri got back. He hadn't seen Ami since she left him at the bridge that morning, and quite frankly, he wasn't ready to meet her again. Walking through the open gates of the Kou place, he knocked at the front door. There was no answer, but Tasuki came out from around the corner of the house, wiping sweat off his brow.

"Okaeri. "

"Tadaima," Chichiri replied. He noticed the ax in his hand. "Finally earning your keep, are you, no da?"

Making a face, Tasuki swung the blade over his shoulder. "Go on in. Yer th' last one back. Ami's made lunch, but she ran off sayin' she had chores ta do."

"Lolita-chan, no da?"

"Still asleep when I left 'er." He waved a hand, disappearing back to where he came from.

Chichiri entered the silent house. Without its usual riot of inhabitants, it felt too large and too empty. Everything was spic-and-span, though covered by that layer of inexistent dust that coated all preparations after the anticipated event was done. All the red cloth suddenly seemed faded and droopy. The groom's gifts, not yet stored away, felt stale. But there was a breath of relief in the place – the relief of life finally being able to return to normal.

He decided to check on Lolita first. The guest room was empty, so he headed for the other logical place – Tasuki's room. That was empty, too.

Chichiri began to worry a little. Maybe she'd left without telling anybody?

"Lolita-chan?" he called, loudly enough to be heard only within the house. No sense throwing Tasuki into impulsive panic mode.

His voice bounced off the walls, unanswered.

He walked faster, peeking into every room, checking every last corner. Very quickly, he ran out of rooms to look into. The last place he hadn't gone to yet was the kitchen. Weaving through the cluttered dining hall, he peered into the adjoining kitchen, and breathed a sigh of relief. There she was, head on her arms, asleep on the kitchen counter.

"Lolita-chan," he crossed the room to gently shake her. "Wake up. Lunch time, no da."

A soft moan and she stirred. Slowly, Lolita lifted her head, unfocused eyes trying to make out the face of this man who interrupted her sleep. "Tasuki...?"

"It's me, no da. Chichiri."

"Oh. You're...home." She slid back her chair, but her legs gave as soon as she tried to stand. When Chichiri caught her his expression turned into one of alarm.

"You're burning up, no da!" He sat her down again and began yanking cabinets open and closed in search of a washcloth.

"Must have caught a bug or something," she groaned, listlessly watching his progress. "It'll be gone in a day or two."

But he wasn't so sure. "Do you have a headache, no da?"

"No...I'm just tired. Maybe I need to catch up on all that lost sleep."

"That's a good idea." At last finding what he wanted, Chichiri dipped it in cool water, wrung it out, and laid it over her forehead.

"Thanks. That feels good."

He helped her stand and together, they made their way to the guestrooms. Chichiri tucked her in and had just sat down beside her with a basin of water when she said, "So how'd it go?"

"How did what go, no da?" He rinsed out the warm washcloth.

"Well, Ami looked better than she had in days when she came in this morning. I'm presuming you guys kissed and made up?"

"Can we talk about something else, no da?"

"Oh, Chichiri. I'm sick. Indulge me." She grinned.

He couldn't help grinning back. Yet he shook his head. "I'm afraid my answer won't please you very much. Ami-san and I...didn't talk. Not really, no da."

"Quit calling her Ami-_san _, please? She used to be Ami-_chan_ to you."

Chichiri stared at his hands for a very long time, turning them over and over. "She...she told me my opinion of her didn't matter."

"In those exact words?"

His smirk was a wry one. "More or less."

Unexpectedly, Lolita laughed. The sound was weak, but given her state, Chichiri was gratified to hear it nonetheless. "She pulled one on you, didn't she?"

"Is this the part where I get to say I'm the biggest loser, no da?"

"Nah," shifting so she could look at him better, Lolita poked a hand from under the blankets and grasped the fingers clenched on his knee. "It won't make you feel any better. Why not work at turning things around one-eighty degrees instead?"

Turning his palm up, he squeezed back. "Why are you so intent on Ami...chan and I fixing things between us?" He had meant for it to be nothing more than a thought, but it slipped out of his mouth before he could catch his words.

"Bucket list," she replied simply, rolling over onto her back again.

"What's that, no da?"

"Nothing important." Lolita smiled at the ceiling. "Just some stuff I want to get done." Then she closed her eyes, letting her hand grow slack in Chichiri's grasp. "So help me, okay? And...thanks in advance."

~010101~

That night, Tasuki created a ruckus around the house. Lolita wasn't sure why, but it had to be something major for Chichiri to be walking around like an old man, Ami to be hoarse, and Tasuki's own father to actually raise his voice. All of it, though carefully kept away from the sickroom, filtered in anyway. Lolita kept herself up and amused waiting to hear what would happen next. So far, nobody had dropped into her room since she woke up that afternoon, and she was curious as to what the riot was all about.

By nightfall, the mêlée had toned down somewhat. The door to the guest room finally creaked open.

"Tasuki?" She righted herself, smoothing down tousled locks. He hadn't been to see her all day.

"No, dear," came the uncharacteristically soft reply of his mother. Mrs. Kou backed into the room, setting down a tray of steaming porridge onto the bedside table.

"Thank you."

The older woman smiled. "You should eat. Shun-chan made this for you."

Her eyes widened. "H-he did? But I thought Tasuki said he couldn't...cook."

"No, he can't," the bandit seishi's mother laughed, taking the empty chair at her bedside. "But he insisted on making you something. Nearly blew up the kitchen doing so," she shook her head, not attempting to hide the smile. "Such a sweet boy."

"He is," Lolita agreed with a sigh. Now if only that sweet boy would overcome his shyness and come in to see her. "Did he burn himself?"

Mrs. Kou shrugged. "But you're beginning to think like a wife."

She looked so hopeful Lolita couldn't bear to continue this silent lying. "Tasuki and I aren't really – "

"Engaged, I know." She looked down at her hands for a moment before lifting her eyes to meet Lolita's. "But...tell me one thing: has he asked you to marry him?"

She swallowed. Should she keep pretending, or tell his mother the painful truth? Lolita opened her mouth to answer, found herself shutting it again, and nodded. "I turned him down."

"How did he take it?" Mrs. Kou didn't look at her now, her gaze wandering to the neighbour's wall visible outside the guest room window.

"I don't know," she admitted. "It ended...differently. And then we just didn't talk about it afterwards."

The older woman didn't say anything for a long time, but when she looked at Lolita again, there was a silent plea in her expression. "My...my son...loves you. He swore never to love a woman, but he...fell in love...with you. I'm not so naive to believe that loves like yours are meant to go smoothly. You both...belong in two different worlds, Lolita-chan. Two very different worlds. And Shun'u..."

"Will have to learn to move on," she finished quietly. "As much as I love him I know that I cannot stay. That's why I couldn't let him...marry me. I can't tie him down." Forcing on a brave smile she continued, "Whatever we had between us has ended. We're over...Tasuki and I." Lolita tried not to cry, but saying those words brought reality down on her, and heavily. She sobbed, face buried in her hands. From today onwards, Tasuki was no longer hers, per se, nor was she, his.

Surprisingly, her older companion reached over to rub soothing circles on her back. "No dear," she murmured softly as Lolita cried harder, "it isn't over. It doesn't look like it's over to me, so it most certainly shouldn't be to the two of you."

"Mrs. Kou..."

She shook her head. "Don't give me that. Now, what do you call your mother?"

"M...mom..."

"Not too bad sounding." She smiled as Lolita lifted her tear-stained face. "From now on, you'll call me that, too. And you'll call Shun-chan's father...what _do_ you call your father?"

"Dad."

"Dad it is, then. Mom and Dad."

"But isn't it presumptuous to call you both Mom and Dad when Tasuki and I aren't even married?"

Mrs. Kou laughed. "I don't need a wedding to tell me when I've gotten myself another daughter."

Tentatively, Lolita smiled back. But it was hard to not be sincere about the gesture. In time, she found herself grinning through quickly drying tears, and meaning it. "Thanks...Mom."

~010101~

She didn't get better, and it looked like she was never going to. Tasuki had moved Lolita into his room, holding her as she slept through nights of fever-ravaged rest. In the morning, he went about his chores listlessly, hurrying through them so he could get back to his place beside her. She was usually awake and better in the mornings. They would talk then. But as days crawled by, she slept more and more. Tasuki barely left her side. He brought in a doctor to see her, but even the old man couldn't tell what was wrong with her.

Only Chichiri knew.

He stayed with her during those rare periods when Tasuki was away. He'd sit in his fellow seishi's chair, take her hand, and lose a little bit of hope every time. Every time he touched her, he'd feel the way her chi wound down to a sleepy weakness. Bits of her died everyday – bits no amount of his specialized chi could replace. Many times he'd been on the verge of telling Tasuki, but at each attempt, he'd remember that one time she squeezed his hand back ever-so-softly, thanking him for letting her stay just a little bit longer, for giving her another day in Konan, another day with Tasuki. And then he wouldn't be able to make himself say the words he should have.

But even the strongest resolve crumbles, and Chichiri's did on the day Tasuki stalked into town to vent out frustrations. He had been watching over her and trying to soothe the heat of her fever when, suddenly, her chest stopped its erratic rise-and-fall. Chichiri grasped her wrist, but the pulse that should have been there was still. Shooting out of his chair, he bent over the bed, ready to transfuse some of his ki to bring her back around. Then just as he was reaching for her, Lolita gave a little gasp. Her pulse stammered, thumping back to life as suddenly as it had winked out of it.

The seishi leaned back, waiting for her to open her eyes. The most Lolita managed was a moan. Then her fingers twitched as if seeing whether her body still worked after its brief tête-à-tête with death. Head lolling to the side, she fell back into deep sleep, one that even Chichiri wasn't sure she would still wake up from.

That very night, he sat out his vigil. Tasuki came back late. When crept into his room, he found Chichiri on the bedside chair, eyes closed and Lolita's hand held loosely in his. The bandit seishi shut the door, the click of it against the frame bringing Chichiri around.

The monk turned to him. Gently placing Lolita's limp hand back on the bed, he stood, his maskless face drawn, his stance hard. Tasuki began to fear that he had come too late, but that was not what Chichiri wanted to say.

"Tasuki," the older of the two began, "we leave for Taikyouku tonight. Lolita-chan needs to return to her world."

The other jerked involuntarily. "We can't send 'er back in that state!"

"She'll be well once she gets home."

"She's sick 'ere so 'a course she'll be sick there! What th' hell're ya tryin' ta get at? That bein' 'ere's makin' 'er sick?"

"Yes," replied Chichiri quietly. Tasuki staggered. Holding the bandit's eyes steadily the former continued, "Why do you think she needs so much sleep? Because she needs to replenish all the chi she's lost – the chi that our world has been taking from her. She's sick now because she's lost far too much energy than her body can take, and _she's just going to get worse_."

"Then why...you could have said..."

His fingers tightened around his mask, almost crushing it. Chichiri dropped his eyes "She didn't want to go. Didn't want to leave you alone. Still...I should have said something. What I did was dumb..."

"Nothin' we can do about it, now," Tasuki answered with surprising calm, though his hand clenched when he looked at Lolita's quietly sleeping figure. A sheen of cold sweat still dotted her forehead, but at least her rest was undisturbed. He knew Chichiri had been giving her periodic bursts of his own chi. Crossing the room, he stared down at her, and then brushed a tentative hand over her damp bangs.

"When do we leave?"

"Tomorrow morning. But we can leave tonight if you want to."

Tasuki sat at the bed, his back to Chichiri. "T'night." He took a shaky breath. "We go t'night."

With a short nod, the other left the room to collect Ami. She was easy to wake. Briefly explaining where they were going and why, they trudged back to Tasuki's room. That was when Chichiri remembered Lolita asking him to make the first move with Ami. Casting a sideways glance at the girl beside him,he opened his mouth. "Anou..."

She met his look with a tight smile. "You said this was an emergency, right? So focus. Whatever you're going to say, if it's not about the situation at hand, will have to wait. Okay?"

He could only nod.

Tasuki was ready when the others came in. A short note to his parents lay on the table, and he had Lolita bundled in a blanket, in his arms. Spreading his kesa on the floor, Chichiri beckoned for them all to stand together on it. The sound of his murmured spell filled the air. The bit of cloth glowed red; his friends began sinking through it. At the very last moment he, too, stood at the portal, watching Tasuki's bedroom disappear around them as the red light began to fade and finally vanish with the four of them.

**~010101~**

**A/N: A few more surprises have yet to be uncovered, but we're only a few chapters away from the finish! Thank you for a wonderful 2010, especially those who've added this story to their alerts/favourites list, to those who've taken the time to tell me what they've thought of this piece, and to all the other readers I have yet to have the pleasure of knowing. Happy new year! :)**


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19: You are You

This was the first time Ami ever thought it could rain in heaven. She stood behind a latticed screen watching sheets of rain pour down on the immaculately landscaped garden on the other side of the long hall. Chichiri was in one of the rooms with a perplexed-looking Taiitsukun and he had asked her to wait outside. Tasuki was hustled into a bedroom the moment they arrived, and had been there for hours.

Hands clasped behind her, Ami sighed and rested her forehead on the smooth woodwork. She was beginning to wonder how much longer Chichiri's meeting was going to drag on when the great doors suddenly opened.

She whirled. "Are we ready to go home?"

For a moment the monk's face contorted into a little wince. Without a mask, the effect was multiplied several times over. Ami found herself growing inexplicably nervous.

"Lolita-chan's going home as planned, no da." He paused to take a deep breath and continued, "But you are staying."

Despite herself, Ami gave in to the urge to snicker. "What? Haven't I stayed long enough? I've got some pretty important things going on back home."

Chichiri's eye closed, and looked away from her to the floor. "You'd best...forget about them form now on...no da."

Ami was beginning to ask why when Taiitsukun floated out from the room. She looked from her student to Ami, back and forth, and finally said, "I asked you to bring her in, Chichiri, not handle things your way." Whereupon the monk ducked into a bow and brushed past his teacher back into the meeting room.

"What was that about?" Ami blinked at them both.

"There's something you need to know, child," Taiitsukun replied, scratchy voice somehow managing a softer tone. Nodding towards the open threshold, she was about to follow Chichiri back in when Ami's voice stopped her.

"Wait a minute – we came to send Lolita home before everything's too late. I mean...that's what Chichiri said, and that's what I assume we should be doing right now. Right? ...Right?" Her words came to a grinding halt as she continued to stare at the Creator's stony face. Ami began to realize that she had absolutely no idea what was going on. Not really. Floundering, she nevertheless babbled on, "We should be saving lives here. Whatever I have to know, I can know later. But we have to..."

"Ami-chan."

She jumped at the voice. It was Chichiri's. It came from inside the room. It sounded really, really strange.

"Come on in."

Her legs obeyed, carrying her to the door, through it, and to a seat several feet beside the monk. Ami fidgeted; looking now here, now there...anywhere but at the gargantuan mirror floating before them, the only ornament in the marbled hall.

Taiitsukun drifted to the side of the mirror, looking like an emcee about to give the opening remarks. Stern eyes flickered, settling first on the bowed blue head, and then at the curious little face beside it. She almost wanted to tell the girl it was a prank, but she had duties to accomplish, and amongst them were, sometimes, disclosing the painful truth.

"Ami." The girl snapped to attention. "Do you remember how you came into this world?"

Dark eyes only stared back at her. Very slowly, their owner shook her head.

"Well then...can you tell me what happened when you were washed away in the flood?"

There was a long pause, during which Chichiri actually lifted his head to look at her. She met his gaze, and then had to avert her eyes, feeling suddenly naked. "I was... These..." Unconsciously, she wrapped her arms around her waist, hugging herself, clothing herself against what felt like probing looks. "Images. Like memories...but not quite. I don't know. I...I don't understand..."

"What was the last thing you remember doing in your world?"

"Going to sea. A little boy couldn't get out of the water...the tide was coming up."

"And what happened in your vision?"

"I couldn't surface. I was...drowning."

Taiitsukun nodded. Chichiri looked pained. "If you were told once more that you could not return home," the Creator said, "would you be able to guess why?"

Ami's brow creased in thought, and then suddenly cleared as her eyes widened in understanding. Helplessly, she looked to Taiitsukun for a refutation, but the old woman merely turned to the mirror. The surface clouded, and then cleared with a scene. Ami's eyes flickered to the picture, disbelieving, and then to Chichiri. The monk was watching her closely, pain written all over his face.

She knew what Taiitsukun was showing her; she just didn't understand why. For a moment fear danced within her. Who was everyone wearing black for? Who was in the big black box...in the coffin?

Her father? No; he was right there in the front row, looking stoically handsome in his mourning clothes, political friends ranged on the seats behind him.

Was it their mother? ...No. She was in front of the whole assembly, preparing to give a speech. Shuffling papers in her hands, the blonde woman looked out at the mourners. Her lower lip quivered, but she bravely began, "Wherever she is, I hope my daughter can forgive me."

Daughter? Was it her sister, then? No; she was right beside their father, a piece of paper sorely abused in her wringing hands. It was strange to see Claire so ruffled, her eyes red-rimmed.

"As a mother, I have committed the ultimate wrong of shunning her. She came back asking for forgiveness..."

As her attention travelled away from the speaker, Ami began to be able to take in more of the strange movie. She realized she knew most of the people in the crowd. They were people she'd gone to school with – the principal, her old friends, a few of her classmates; people she worked with – lifeguards, waiters and waitresses at the restaurant she worked in part-time... A sinking feeling began creeping up inside her. She cast her eyes back to the front of the room, towards the coffin, seeing it now in a harsh new light. It was too big, too bulky, too overcrowded with flowers and candles and – the breath hitched at her throat – pictures. Framed pictures, mostly of a child. There was one with a rowdy group of teenagers, and one obviously taken from the school yearbook.

With weakening knees, she dragged herself to the mirror. Chichiri rose halfway but was stopped by a stern glance from his teacher. Ami placed her hands over the pictures, recognizing herself in some of them. There were others, especially the shots of the little girl, that she had never seen before. Little white creases crisscrossed across them as if someone had kept them crumpled for a very long time before smoothing them out again. The corner of one was stained with dirt.

"...It may be too late to say this, but Ami, Mommy loves you. We all do; we were just foolish enough to never tell you before..."

Her eyes filled with tears.

"As we put you to rest..."

She jerked backwards, stumbling a few steps. _What?_

"...we can only hope to see you again someday..."

Like a horror movie, the picture zoomed in. She saw the person everyone was mourning. It was neither her father, nor her mother, nor her sister. She knew the person lying dead below the glass window. She had known her since they were children. Of course. She was, after all, staring at herself.

"...We love you."

Knees buckling at last, Ami screamed.

Chichiri tore across the hall without a second thought. He tried to gather her to himself, but Ami fought out of his grasp, hysterically sobbing as she pounded on the mirror.

"Mommy! Daddy! Claire! I love you...I love you! I'm right here! I'm not dead! Mommy –!"

"Ami-chan, please calm down!" Forcefully, Chichiri wrapped his arms around hers, pulling her back against him and away from the mirror. She struggled wildly, but Chichiri was determined this time, shutting his eyes and his ears to the stream of verbal abuse. "It's no use," he kept murmuring, flinching when she began digging her nails into his wrists. "You can't go back home, Ami-chan. So please calm down...calm down..."

After a final, futile attempt to wrest herself free, Ami grew still. She seemed to shrink into herself so that Chichiri was, even then, reluctant to let go. When she spoke, her voice was raw with bitterness. "Don't ever think you have the right to tell me that. I can't go home and I can't stay here. I have nowhere to go! How the hell – just tell me _how the hell_ am I supposed to calm down when I might as well _die_?"

"_Never _say that!" It came out as such an abrupt snap that Ami sucked in a breath and grew quiet. Chichiri loosened his hold a little. "You can stay here. You can stay with me."

"I don't need your pity."

"I'm not offering it." His voice softened. "I'm admitting a mistake. And I am very, very sorry for having judged you when I did not have the right to."

Extricating herself from him, "I want to be alone. I don't...I don't hate you," she added quickly, looking anywhere but at his face, "I just need to think. So please... leave."

She didn't see it, but he nodded anyway. As he stood, he cast a last appraising look at her, offered a short bow, and walked away. Ami did not move until she heard the door click shut behind him. Then she raised her head.

And saw Taiitsukun floating near where Chichiri had just been, looking like her usual, stern self.

"I said I wanted to be alone," she muttered, turning stubbornly back towards the mirror, which had thankfully cleared. Now all she saw there was the harsh reflection of her puffy, red-blotched face and curled, insecure figure.

"There is one final thing you have to know."

Ami ignored her.

With an inaudible sigh Taiitsukun shook her head. Nevertheless, she continued, "Chichiri does not know it, but it was because of him that you were brought to live here instead when you...passed away...in your world. Suzaku thought it was time for him to, you might say, grow up, and hopes that you might be able to help him do that." She emitted a derisive little laugh. "He might act like he's in control, but one must never forget that that student of mine has his childish tendencies, too. The older he gets, the more they seem to resurface."

Taiitsukun paused, waiting for her to say something.

She remained silent.

"I shall leave you to your thoughts, then." And shaking her head once more, the Creator vanished.

~010101~

When Tasuki backed into the room, the last thing he expected to hear was a cheery little voice saying, "Let's go for a walk!"

He nearly dropped the tray in his hands. It was Lolita, looking as chipper as she could in rumpled sleeping robes and blinking at him from her perch on the edge of the bed. When he left only a few minutes ago she was still stirring from sleep.

"Ne, Tasuki?"

Plunking supper down on a convenient table, he went over to feel her forehead. It still burned with the stubborn fever. "No. Yer too sick."

"Come on, don't be a spoilsport."

"Get back ta bed."

They had a brief staring match until Lolita gave up. "It's your fault if my ghost gets trapped in this room forever," she muttered with a pout. "That would suck so bad."

"Ya know I don't like ya talkin' about that."

"Come off it, Tasuki," she sighed. "We've been avoiding this conversation since two weeks ago when I got sick. I say it's about damn time we dig it up and lay it straight."

"Fine. Whatever." Whipping off his coat, he wrapped her in it and scooped her up. "Where d'ya wanna go?"

"Cliff on top of the waterfall."

They started walking. Dusk was falling and Taikyouku was surprisingly Nyan-nyan free. Sunset shadows slunk down the walls, swallowing up expanses of marble in its wake.

Tasuki strode down the halls. With Lolita lying noiselessly in his arms, he felt strangely alone and claustrophobic, like the world was closing up around him. They emerged from the palace into the gardens but the lump in his throat wouldn't budge. It grew, blocking his throat, cutting off his air supply. Suddenly he couldn't breathe. A steady pounding grew in his head. Lolita still wasn't moving; wasn't saying anything. Tasuki wasn't sure he could still hear her breathing.

The panicked steps at last brought them from the formal landscapes into a narrow uphill stone path. A whip of nippy air sailed down from the crest, blasting into his face and combing into his hair. He sucked in a lungful. Lolita shivered.

He glanced down. "Continue?"

"March on, soldier!"

Tasuki smiled despite himself. Hitching her higher up his arms, he began the climb up the rocky trail. They had no light, but a line of paper lanterns lit the way. He followed the winding path so high uphill that the air began to grow thin. Mist swirled around them, veiling the shadows of nearby pines in white. He walked until he heard the first sounds of water, and then left the trail to follow the echo. The surrounding wood thinned out until it finally cleared at the base of a monstrous block of jutting rock. Beneath it spurted the mouth of a waterfall.

He sat down near the edge of the cliff, Lolita in his lap. The rising moon threw the first rays of pale light upon them.

"Thank you," she whispered, settling into his embrace.

"Yer ghost won't be trapped now, I b'lieve?" His attempt at humour was tinged with bitter sorrow.

"No."

"Lo –" he halted, buried his nose in her hair and went on, "I think...I think I'd like it better if yer ghost was inside a room. 'Least...I'd know where ta look."

"You won't like me as a ghost. Trust me."

"I'm tryin' ta be serious here."

"And I'm trying...not to make you cry."

"I'm not cryin'."

"I don't mind boys who cry."

"I'm not cryin'," the bandit seishi insisted, for which all he got was a gentle laugh. After a moment's silence Lolita shifted in his arms to look up at him.

"You said I'm going back home."

A grunt.

"So how am I supposed to know I'll go home in time? How do I know I won't die first?"

"Th' old hag's pro'lly fig'gered it out, though ya should've asked Chiri if ya wanted ta be sure."

"If I don't die will you try something for me?"

"What'd ya have me do?"

"After I'm gone give me a week. Think of me; mourn for me as if I've died; as if I'd never return; as if we'll never meet again. Just one week: seven days. I'll do the same for you. And after the week we'll go on with our lives, try to move on as best as we can."

He paused, gave her a long look, and shook his head. "I'll give ya th' week. Hell, I'll give ya a whole year if only you'd ask! But I won't move on by pretending I never knew ya. I can't bring myself ta try ta forget."

"We've talked this over before –"

"Wait for me," he insisted, voice husky as he crushed her to himself. "I know it's selfish, but I'll still ask ya ta wait. Somehow, someday –"

The first soft beams of a red light began to come up between them.

Tasuki clutched her tighter to himself as his words grew more strained and panicked. "– we'll meet again. I don't know how long it'll take but I'll find ya. Fer sure..."

Her lips crashed against his in a frenzy of teary longing and fever-fed adrenaline. "I believe you. I'll wait. I promise I'll wait. Be happy. I..."

The red light was growing stronger; a wall between them. When the last flare of red shot up they managed to lock lips one final time. His fingers tangled in her hair.

_I love you._

And then the light died. The jacket fell limp over his arms, still warm, still choked with her scent. The Suzaku seishi doubled over, his face within its folds.

"I...love ya, too...Lo."

~010101~

Her steps halted just at the edge of the shadows. Beyond it was the sweeping front entrance of the heavenly palace, flooded in a pool of moonlight. A figure sat at the white steps, so still she wondered if he had not fallen asleep. Clutching the extra blanket tighter to herself, Ami took that last step and emerged into the light. The figure she was eyeing didn't so much as twitch.

"Chichiri," she said under her breath.

"Can't sleep, no da?" came the reply. Still he didn't move.

"May I join you?"

A nod, at last.

She sat down on the top step beside him, took a breath and let it out slowly. "I'm...ready...to talk. If you still...want to hear it." The words came out in a stammer. She snapped her mouth closed.

"Have you sorted everything out, no da?"

"I have." Drawing up her knees, Ami crossed her arms and rested her chin over them. "And I have no idea where to begin."

"Is there anything you particularly want to do?"

"I..." Huffing a violent sigh she hid her face in her arms. "God, I don't know. I suppose there's no institutional path for me to follow?"

"You make your own path, Ami-chan. From now on, you'll make the path you walk on."

"Like you did, huh?"

Chichiri stiffened. But then he managed to look down with a tight smile. "A little like that."

Unexpectedly Ami giggled. "I don't want to be a nun, though," she said, straightening up and meeting his eyes gaze for gaze. "Maybe I'll be a politician instead, like..." she swallowed and the tears welled in her eyes. And yet she pulled her mouth into a grin. "Like...my daddy. I'll be a good statesman."

"Ami-chan..." he reached out, and she crumpled under his touch. Her tears stained his kesa into a near-black colour.

"If there's one thing I learned all afternoon, it was that...in the end I had nothing to regret after all. I'd done my best; fought my best fight. I've been forgiven, and...that's all I really wanted...in the end." He wrapped an arm around her shoulders. Ami leaned into him, sobbing into his shirt, grabbing onto him for dear life. "I'm a new person at last, but I'm not comfortable in this body. There's something missing. There's a part of me that's not here anymore..."

He knew what was missing. Many long years ago, he had been like her; had felt like her. Even when he came to grips with his destiny and threw himself head-on into his new calling, that weight had been there. It went away only a year ago when he learned to forgive himself and made the decision to start life anew. The weight disappeared. The shackles stopped ringing with every footfall, grew silent, and went away.

"You get used to it, no da," he murmured soothingly. "You get used to the freedom."

They sat entwined in silence for a few more minutes until Ami stopped whimpering and pulled away. "Chichiri, why...why do you still wear your mask?"

"Force of habit, no da."

"But don't you ever get the compulsion to take it off?"

He paused to think. "Let me put it this way: if you could do things over would you change anything?"

"Plenty of things!"

The straightforward answer made him smile. It had been a while he saw this candid side of her. "Would you try to forget the unpleasant things if forgetting would make you a whole different person?"

Something akin to understanding lit her eyes and slowly, Ami shook her head. "I...I guess not."

"That's just how it is with my mask, no da. It reminds me...of me."

They stared at each other until Ami surrendered to a chuckle. "Remind yourself...of yourself? It sounds silly from this point of view!" When she sobered up, though, she rewarded him with a sincere smile. Her eyes still glistened with unshed tears, but the conviction in her voice spoke for itself. "I think I really want to be a politician, Chichiri. Like my daddy, but not quite. And while I'm at it, I'll be careful not to lose sight of what's really important."

~010101~

She first woke up with her head against cold stone. Her body ached all over and she was tired. For a moment she thought she was dying in dungeon somewhere; it took her a full minute to realize that the blinding beam above her was not The Light, but a chopper's searchlight. Lolita stayed conscious long enough to read the bold "Coast Guard" printed on the body of the helicopter before blacking out.

The second time she woke up she found herself lying on a hospital bed, apparently being treated for mild hypothermia and, ironically, a fever. Somewhat more rational the second time around, she began looking herself all over. Gone were the Konan clothes, replaced instead by a nightdress and sweater. Lolita was just deciding to go back to sleep when she realized that she was missing her doll. Kicking off the blankets, she looked under them and under her pillow. She was even on the point of dropping to her knees to search under the bed when, sheepishly, she saw it on the nightstand across the room, propped up against a glass of water. Picking it up, she padded back to bed.

The TV caught her attention. It had been turned low so that if she chose, she could ignore the murmur of the news anchor. But when the screen flashed a succession of familiar photographs, Lolita couldn't help watching. She turned the volume up until the words filtered into her tired senses.

"...Today, Senate President Arthur Langley, his wife, their eldest daughter Claire, their friends, and their family, braved the late summer downpour to send their second child Amelia to her final resting place. Amelia Langley drowned the Saturday of last week after trying to save a little boy from the incoming tides..."

_Ami's...dead...?_

Another set of footsteps entered the room and Lolita's mother found her still standing, staring at the evening news as tears streamed down her face.

Her hands were cold, but it wasn't because of the autumn chill. She had just been to the cemetery to lay flowers at her friend's grave, and to stop by the post office. Now she hesitated at the front door, a thick manila envelope clutched to her chest. Under her clenched fists, her heart beat fast; expectant, excited, frightened.

This was going to be her first official revolt.

The door flew open before she knocked and there, framed in the warm light of the foyer, was her mother. "Come on in, honey. I've got good news for you." And mother and daughter disappeared into the house.

Her father was in the library, legs crossed, leisurely perusing his evening paper, but he looked up when his wife and daughter entered. A grin broke across his face. He rose. He hugged his daughter. He said the words that made her spirits sink.

"Congratulations. A letter has just come in from Vienna. They want you at the auditions next week."

Lolita smiled, tried to reply. But where words failed her, tears did not. Her eyes prickled hot and, pressing the back of her hand to her mouth, she threw down the envelope. Her parents hovered protectively around her. She took a gasping breath and then shook her head. "I'm not going."

"But you're even lucky they want you –" interjected her mother.

"I'm not going!" she almost screamed. "I don't want to be a musician. That's your dream. I don't want your dream!"

"Lolita!" It was her father, now.

"I want to be an artist!"

"No school is going to accept you now," her mother tried to be reasonable. "It's too late to send in applications..."

"No." Shaking her head, she tore open the envelope, spilling its contents onto the table. Photographs of artwork spilled across the polished mahogany, falling off the edges, fluttering down to the floor. Above it all was a smaller letter envelope. Its contents have already been read. "I made it to Goldsmiths."

Her mother paled. Her father's hand clenched into a tight fist.

"I want to make my own life. I want to write my own story," And the face that she lifted was, though tear-stained, confident. "If Senator Langely's daughter can do it, I can, too. I want to be brave. I want to throw myself head-on into life. I've only got one shot at it, so I'm going to do it right."

The only sound in the ensuing silence came from the fireplace. Then her mother uttered a piteous little wail and fell upon a nearby chair, head clutched in her hands. Her father cast her a stern look, but the only thing he said to her was "We'll talk about this later," in a tone that Lolita would later learn to recognize as grudging acquiescence.

She nodded, excused herself. She was barely out of the house than she was inside her car, flooring the accelerator. The silver vehicle sailed down the freeway, easing into that familiar beach route. Overhead, the sky roiled a turbulent gray, much like the day of her first encounter. The sea still crashed upon the jagged rocks, breaking foam. She pulled up at her favourite spot, from where she had a broad sweep of the beachfront. The beach club, the empty places that used to house billowing tents, the abandoned beach chairs...and the well.

The engine purred into silence and Lolita leaned back. Her doll version swung from where it hung on the rearview mirror. She reached to cup it in her palm; squeezed the belly. The amulet was still there. And quite unable to take it anymore she suddenly laughed. She laughed so hard it was difficult to breathe. But she couldn't stop. Not when it felt so good and the memory of him hurt so bad.

_Tasuki..._

A tear slid down her cheek.

_...I'm not a doll anymore._

She vowed that that would be the last.

~010101~

He gave her the week she asked for, and more. All the way back to the palace Tasuki was miraculously silent, absorbed in thought while Chichiri helped Ami make plans. Vaguely, their conversation drifted through his busy mind:...learn the language...learn Konan's history...study politics...maybe she could start out as somebody's secretary...

He, too, was making plans. Now that the last memory of her stung less and less, his mind cleared enough to enable him to think through his next step. He vowed to find her. She promised to wait. He didn't know how to find her yet, but he would. In the meantime, he had think about what he would do once he found her. Where would they live? What could he offer her? And in the space of those months it took to travel from Mt. Taikyouku to Eiyou, Tasuki made up his mind.

After paying the usual formalities upon their return, and after Chichiri and Ami laid their proposal before an enthusiastic Houki-sama, Tasuki let one night fly. He gave himself one last chance to change his mind, and spent that whole night in wakeful contemplation. Dawn found him staking out the hall before the audience chamber, restlessly pacing, running his lines over and over in his head. When the Empress took her place at the throne, he was the first one at the foot of it, kneeling with bowed head.

"Yer Majesty," he began, and forgot everything he had rehearsed. "Yer Majesty," he said again, "I'd like ta join th' army."

Houki remained silent for so long that Tasuki ventured to raise his head a little. The Empress was looking straight at him, a pitying, puzzled look on her face. "Tasuki-san, why don't you stand up?" He obeyed, and did so with his hands held behind him in an uncharacteristic show of uncertainty. Choosing her words carefully Houki said, "I...sympathize...with your loss but...you must realize what it is you are asking."

He met her eyes gaze for gaze and suddenly those dull amber depths flared.

"I'd like to be a spy, Yer Majesty. Th' boys up Reikaku are a good starting point, an' they've got networks nearly everywhere. We'll have ta start over at th' borders but it can be done. I don't have ta be at the palace all th' time. I'd just send in periodic reports..."

"It is a dangerous job. I'm sure you know that."

"It ain't too different from what we've been doin' during th' war." The smirk that tugged up the side of his mouth was just a little too tired; a little too worn out with pleading; a little too much of a desperate attempt to secure assent.

At length Houki sighed. Though she wasn't too keen on his proposal, she knew there was nothing much she could do about it. Tasuki was stubborn and would always end up getting what he wanted one way or another. At least, she thought, if she employed him, she would always know what he was about and would somehow be able to curb what seemed to be his inherent recklessness.

"All right," she finally nodded. "We'll try it. I like your idea of setting up a network at the borders. I want to hear a full proposal on that matter tomorrow morning. Same time."

"Yes, Yer Majesty." Tasuki dropped a bow and was turning to go when Houki's voice caught up to him.

"Be careful. And...I'm sorry...about what happened..."

His back muscles tensed for a minute, but he turned around and was even able to flash his usual lopsided smirk at his Empress. "Don't be, Houki-sama. I'll bring 'er back. You'll see."

**~010101~**

**Wai! I think maybe this chapter's my favourite. Everything seems to converge and to end here. The storyline feels cleaned up all of a sudden, and the major character turning points have happened. How many were suprised that Ami and Chichiri didn't turn out to be a pairing? (grin) I must confess, though, that that was what I had intended to happen from the start. But halfway through I felt they just didn't have that special spark and their story...just didn't write itself into a romance, I guess. Chiri-kun's been grossly neglected in this story. Gomen ne, Mr. No da-man. ^^**

**On a note: THIS DOES NOT END HERE. I already have an epilogue planned and will work on it at the soonest possible time. I hope to have it up in time for Valentines' Day, but if not, then maybe some other day, but still within February. **

**Thank you to those who have added LOTCT to their favourites/alerts list. Maybe some time soon I'll get to hear from you guys? .^ I sure hope so. Cheerio!**


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter 20 (Epilogue): You Get Some, You Lose Some

**~ Four years later in Real World Time; Seven years later in The Book Time~**

Tasuki clearly remembered the first time he knelt before the Empress with such trepidation. He was twenty and was asking to be admitted into the Konan military. Now at twenty-seven, he headed the Intelligence branch of the army, which boasted of omniscience: from the most inconsequential scullery gossip to how the whispered sweet nothings between Kutou's Prime Minister and his new concubine could rock the Empire's politics. He had served his country well and decided that now was the time to put his most cherished plans into fruition.

The Empress seemed to be sharing the same thoughts for her eyes twinkled as she appraised the young man before her. "I suppose it's high time to let you go?"

"If it pleases Your Majesty." Much of his accent had been lost over years of listening to the formal speech of courtiers, but that old, underlying drawl remained. "I plan to head to Taikyouku with Chichiri. We'll see what happens then."

"How much time away do you want?"

He hesitated. "A..a year, Houki-sama. If all goes according to plan," came the hasty rejoinder.

"I regret having to do without you for so long," she said, and for a heart-stopping minute he thought he wouldn't be allowed to go. "But the border guards will hold up. They have strengthened so much over the years and your deputy overseer is, I trust, a capable man."

"He's a clever fellow, Your Majesty."

"Then I have no worries." Spreading her hands, Houki smiled. "Go and do what you must. Konan gives you its best wishes."

~010101~

The sun streamed through the apartment windows but the occupant had already been awake an hour since. Standing before the large sheet of glass he stared down at the streets below, which were all still swathed in a grey mist. Just a few blocks down the opposite road stretched a long building, a portion of its facade panelled in clear glass. Except for dots of orange streetlight and a glow from the lobby within, the building was dark.

Six months ago he was granted permission to search for her. The Creator had dropped him very conveniently in the same vicinity she was in, but Tasuki had not expected such a large and confusing city. He thought at first that both of them would find each other with no large amount of difficulty. But when months passed without his even hearing of her, he began to wonder whether she still thought of him. At any rate, he had to fulfill his promise. He would continue to look for her until his time ran out...in approximately in a week.

Gulping piping black coffee he continued watching the building exactly as he had been doing most mornings and evenings since he arrived at her world. Never having seen her, he thought about changing tactics, but the habit had grown on him. So he continued to stand at the window everyday, hoping to see that familiar flash of blonde hair and that stumbling, childish run.

This morning was different. There was a hectic feel about the way the school's doors swung open and closed every few minutes; about the way a line of cabs sat waiting at the curb as a continuous stream of students in groups of three or four piled in with monstrous packages. An almost reckless elation pervaded the air.

He emptied his cup and held the still warm glass in his hands. A new group came tumbling out of the doors, this time with misshapen blobs covered in newspaper. He had seen enough of this school's students to know that nothing was unusual for them. These new packages looked like they were separate pieces for a curious sculpture.

He was about to walk back into the kitchen when one of the girls tossed her head in an achingly familiar gesture. From her black bag hung what could have easily been a plushie, but she tossed it into the back seat of a cab before he could be sure. As she tucked her hair behind her ears in the same impatient, infantile gesture he loved so much, Tasuki couldn't help smiling. Except for her copper hair, the girl could easily have been his Lolita. He would have loved to see her face, her eyes especially, but her back was turned to him. In a minute she had slipped into the cab, giggling as she squeezed in beside a male classmate. Then they drove away and another cab cruised up to accommodate yet another group of students.

He left the window excited. It was hard to pinpoint about what, but it prompted him to make his bed and to step into the shower earlier than usual. Today, the skies figuratively broke open. He felt that he was upon her trail and would find her soon. The first clue was at Goldsmiths.

~010101~

"Really, Honey, it's not safe to drive that fast," were the first words out of Lolita's mother's mouth as her daughter swung into the hotel driveway. She had been waiting excitedly, pacing about in her room for a good half hour before deciding to just get down to the lobby to wait for Lolita's arrival. The said daughter only laughed as she stepped out of her car wearing the black dress they picked together for graduation day...and the most hideous, her mother could swear, sneakers ever created.

"Where are your heels?"

"In the –" Lolita whirled around only to see the valet take her car down to basement parking. "...car. Whoops." A girlish giggle bubbled from her throat, one that the older woman couldn't resist smiling at.

"Never mind. We'll just call to have it brought up." She hustled her daughter back into the hotel and up the suite she and her husband checked in at.

"Where's Daddy?" Lolita asked, bouncing into the room. She plopped down before the vanity table where a wide array of make up already stood waiting.

"Out to do errands," her mother replied mildly, fluttering around with a tube of liquid foundation.

From where her head had to be frozen in place, Lolita cast a look around the room. A large floral bouquet lay atop the king-sized bed. Spare surfaces were covered with flyers and bits of paper. Her father's laptop bag reclined against an armchair while suitcases covered every remaining inch of floor space.

"Gosh, your room looks as if you've moved in already."

"Most of those trunks are yours, remember?"

"Suitcases, Mommy. 'Trunks' sounds so Victorian." But she spared a more critical eye at her belongings. "Hey, where's my dolly?"

"Your mini you?" Leaning back, her mother nodded at her handiwork. "Gracious, dear, you're too old for toys. You're twenty-two and graduating today!"

"But Mom..." the beginnings of a whine tinged her tone. "You know I never go anywhere without my dolly. Someone important gave it to me."

Rolled eyes and a sigh. "Yes; somebody like an old boyfriend you'll never tell me about."

"I didn't say it was an old boyfriend," Lolita countered, eyes wide and innocent.

"Close your eyes." And a sweep of eyeshadow dashed across the younger girl's lids. "You don't have to be explicit for me to know. It's called 'mother's intuition'."

Impatiently, Lolita looked at her reflection, winking several times at her eyeshadow. "Nice. Wonder why they didn't teach this at art school?" She turned her face back up at her mother. "Someday you'll meet him. You and Dad. He promised to come back for me, you know."

"I don't see why you never talk about him. What, is he an escaped criminal?"

She coughed to conceal her laugh. _Mother's intuition, indeed._ "You wouldn't believe me if I told you."

"I didn't believe plenty of things you told me fours years ago..." The fluttering hands stopped and Lolita looked up to see her mother's faraway look and tight expression. "You were hiding the same things then that you're hiding now about your 'old boyfriend'."

"Mom." She rose to hug her mother, and it was with a swell of emotion. "I can't wait for the day when I tell you everything. But for now, just believe me. When he shows up we'll come clean. He's coming very soon. I know it."

~010101~

Tasuki glanced between the flyer in his hand and the building before him. They matched. The program was supposed to start two hours ago; he had gone and dropped by Goldsmiths first hour in the morning, saw her name in the list of student exhibitors, and spent the rest of the day trying to figure out what graduation gift to get. He found it thirty minutes before the start of the program, rushed, and got stuck in a traffic jam. So he was late. Terribly late.

Older couples, presumably parents of the graduating students, had begun leaving the gallery. But the interior was still brightly lit, and expensive-looking cars continued to cruise into the driveway, discharging passengers in business suits and cocktail dresses. He couldn't have been too late. Tasuki made quick work of registration and instantly found himself lost in the middle of a sea of people. Waiters bearing trays of champagne zigzagged through crowds. A rather sizeable congregation gathered before a painting on display at one part of the room, while a crew manned the stage at the front of the room, setting up for the charity auction scheduled for later that night.

It would take a lot of luck to find a person he hadn't seen in years in a gathering of that size.

Just as he was wondering where to begin, a round of applause erupted from the group of potential buyers. He spotted the girl he was so interested in that morning before the crowd moved to the painting she was representing, completely blocking his sight of her. Feeling anticipation grow inside him, Tasuki made a beeline for the assembly. He wasn't able to see her at once, but her voice carried over clearly to him.

"Hi. My name is Lolita, and I call this piece, 'Stronghold'."

~010101~

"...this was painted from memory of a place I'm not sure I'll ever see again..." as she spoke she caught sight of a slight movement in the crowd. A flash of orange, and her breath hitched. She made out a head, a tall, well-built frame, and the owner's averted face. She couldn't be too sure, because she had been wrong so many times before, but there was something about this person that prompted her to believe.

And when the person turned to her and their gazes met, she stopped talking completely. Tears welled in her eyes.

It was him.

She wanted to dive into the audience but Tasuki smiled and motioned for her to go on. She nodded back.

"The misty mountain invites travellers to gaze upon its peak, the path to which is both fraught with peril and yet spotted with beauty. There is a secret stronghold in the heart of the pine forest, an outpost from which men with the most romantic lives look out for advancing enemies. The trail is secret, but deceptively simple."

One of the audience members wanted to know why she chose a stronghold and not the classic monastery in the mountains.

Once again Lolita's and Tasuki's eyes met. "Because the traveller may not know it...but that's where he really wants to be. The wisdom in mountain temples can be too profound; misleading to the uninitiated. But it is in the mountain stronghold that the traveller can rest unencumbered by deep philosophies."

"Will it be included in that auction?" asked a lady from the back. "What's the starting price?" Murmurs of similar curiosity rippled through the audience. Lolita only smiled.

"I'm sorry. This is the only piece in my collection that's not for sale."

A wave of protest erupted from the group, but before anyone could make himself heard the guide announced the next piece on the agenda. The group was obliged to move on, trickling away one by one until only Tasuki remained. They moved, colliding together, grabbing each other into a tight hug.

"No secret routes given away, I see." He laughed softly, kissing the top of her head. "Never thought Reikaku would look good in the moonlight."

Lolta gently pulled away from him. "Tasuki are you sure that's you?" she half-teased, half-laughed. "What happened to your drawl?"

"Lost it." He made a face. "Hard not to when you're talking to ministers all day."

"You became a diplomat?" Why did the very idea strike her as particularly comic?

"I'm in the army," he relied off-handedly. "Anyway." Producing a small box from his jacket pocket, he flicked it open. A diamond ring shone inside. "Congratulations."

Lolita looked between the box and Tasuki's grinning face. He was obviously proud of himself. She didn't want to burst his bubble but she had to ask, "Um...don't you think you've got the occasions wrong?"

"No." His smile grew wider. "Congratulations on your graduation. And once again...will you marry me?"

**~Five Days Later~**

The library was so still the silence buzzed. On the low table stood four cups of untouched coffee, now cold. Lolita's parents, disbelief written all over their faces, listened as their daughter told her tale. When she first began they thought she had gone right over the edge in her joy at being reunited with the young man she met and got herself engaged to all in one night. But she seemed to so believe her story that her parents did not dare to interrupt her, not even for a little knock of reality on the head.

"...and that's how Tasuki and I met." Lolita finished her story. The lovers exchanged smiles.

The parents exchanged looks. Finally, her father uncrossed his legs and leaned forward to look the fiancee straight in the eyes. "You mean," and he was speaking to his daughter, "you're engaged to a bandit who was god-gifted with super powers and who used to travel with his mage monk friend all over the universe...thing...and is now a member of an Imperial army...somewhere...as an intel man?"

"Isn't it great, Daddy?"

Said Daddy sighed, leaned back, crossed his legs, and exchanged another look with his anxious wife. "I don't know, Honey," he turned to his daughter, "that sounds like something from an RPG game plot. You didn't rip it off, did you?"

"Of course not!" Lolita grabbed Tasuki's sleeve and pushed it up. "Look, Tasuki can make his seishi symbol show on command!"

"I...I can't."

"Don't be silly. You've done it countless times before!"

Gently, he removed her hand from his arm and shook his sleeve back into place. "I can't, Lo. Not any more."

"But..."

"Taiitsukun wanted it in exchange for...six months in your world."

"You gave up... But you... It was..."

"Sweetie," her mother began, "he doesn't have to show it to us. Really. It's all right."

"But you and daddy don't believe me!" Lolita cried. "You think I'm going crazy and you think Tasuki is too and that we're both...well...retarded or something!" Digging into her bag she tossed a DVD onto the table and rose, pulling her lover with her. "We're telling the truth you've always wanted to hear! The truth I said you would never believe. And you didn't! We're going away tomorrow and getting married in Konan soon and I may never ever see you guys again and you won't even try to believe me!"

"You're too old for fairytales, Princess."

"But apparently I'm not old enough to stop being your "Princess", Daddy," she retorted with more spite than she intended to. "Sometimes, you know, things come true because you have faith in them. Good thing I have enough faith for the three of us." Muttering about being excused she stomped away, leaving the library door agape for all curious ears outside.

"I'll talk to her," Tasuki offered with a short bow. "Excuse me." And he, too, ran out after Lolita.

If there was something to still be thankful for, it was that she didn't shut her door in his face. Following her to her room Tasuki quietly pushed it closed. She was sitting on the bed with her back to him. He crawled over to place his hands on her shoulders. "Don't get so upset."

"Since when were you the pacifist?" she snapped, but it was with the hint of a sniffle.

"Army detail teaches you plenty of things," he sighed. "Come on. You knew your parents wouldn't be able to swallow our story. No other person in this world could. Except maybe Miaka," he added with a mumble.

Surprisingly, she didn't bite back. Lolita wrapped her arms around herself, tucked her legs underneath her and softly replied, "I'm not mad at my parents. I've been through that before. I'm...disappointed in myself. It's frustrating. How come when people come up to ask me about my work they know how to feel? They can forget reason for the sake of simple understanding. I thought that of all people, my parents would be the ones who could unquestioningly believe in me."

"But Konan's not a painting, Lo," he said, pulling her close and resting his chin on her shoulder. "Being told that their daughter's going away with a man they've never met before and who claims to be from another world is not a painting; especially not when that daughter might never, ever return."

"No," she agreed, "it's an ugly piece of art. God, I never thought art could be ugly until now." Her eyes found the alarm clock on her bed stand. Eleven forty-five pm. At the hall outside the door to the masters' bedroom opened and closed. Extricating herself from Tasuki's grasp Lolita hopped out of bed to rummage her shelves for paper and a pen. There was no pen, but she found a crayon.

"You're going to draw now?" Tasuki asked as she plopped down before her drafting table.

She smiled, though he couldn't see it. "There are fifteen minutes left for me in this world. I could choose to spend it cuddling and ranting with you, or I could do something worthwhile."

"And drawing is more worthwhile than cuddling and ranting?"

This time she turned around so he saw her weak grin. "Who said I was just drawing?"

~010101~

It was just past midnight when she tiptoed down the hall to her daughter's room. Light still shone from under the door. She knocked. There was no answer. She called for her daughter. There was still no answer. Finally, she pushed the door open and stood, uncertain, at the threshold. Everything was in order – the messy kind of lived-in order that Lolita had always insisted upon. Her canvases and sketchpads were all neatly filed away in the large corner shelf. Her pink nightgown still hung over the large armchair in front of the TV. Except for the silence, nothing was out of the ordinary.

She stepped into her daughter's room. The bed was a little dishevelled – wrinkled, like it had been slept on; and the blanket fell all over it instead of being thrown back as would usually happen when the occupants got out. She began to get a little worried about her daughter's absence, but a strange sort of calm seemed to tell her that her darling was all right; that Lolita was safe, and that she was happy.

As she sat upon the edge of the empty bed and smoothed a hand over the covers, she felt as if she was a mother to a child who had just died. The calm was there, but it was so still and so numb. And though she knew that a "better place" existed, she couldn't seem to get herself to part with her child.

She reached over to take the planner lying on the nightstand. Plans for the coming months had already been jotted down. A piece of paper – parchment, she had been informed plenty of times before – was tucked between the pages. She slipped it out. "Dear Mommy," it began, "I'm sorry I yelled at you and Daddy tonight..." And the precious thing spoke about a DVD.

She rushed back down to the library. The disc was still where Lolita had tossed down. Picking it up, she hurried back to her daughter's room, popped it into the player, and waited.

It was home video; a little fuzzy at first and punctuated with loudly whispered instructions. As it cleared, she made out the warm lighting of a theater stage and a shiny black grand piano in the center.

"_Is it recording, Tasuki?"_

"_I think so,"_ came the reply. An unladylike scramble later and Lolita was before the piano, violin in her hands, smiling at the camera.

"_Hey Mommy! I thought I'd leave you and Daddy a little keepsake. It isn't much, but it's the best I could think of. I hope you like it."_

Tears sprung from her eyes when she recognized the first notes. The crafty little thing had brought along a recording of the piano accompaniment and was playing Pachelbel's Canon with it in the background.

"_Remember the first time I played it?"_

She did, indeed. Lolita was seven years old. Mother and daughter glared at each other the whole time, the former urging her to smile, the latter stubbornly wanting to disobey. The child's smile was funny. Very, very funny. Now she wished she had taken a picture of it.

"_I was so scared to play for your friends, but you told me it was your favourite."_

And so it was. Everything Lolita played in the video were things she had been told were her mother's favourites. That mother now marvelled how she remembered them all.

She bowed at the end of the private concert. Her mother's final glimpse of her daughter was of that daughter sitting on the piano stool, the overhead lights throwing harsh shadows over her quivering expression. _"Just think of my going away as a really, really, really long vacation."_ And she paused to nod above the camera. In another short moment her fiancee, looking sheepish, joined her at her perch. _"Tasuki didn't want to come on camera, but I said he had to so that his parents-in-law's friends would see how great of a son-in-law he was...or is it 'going to be'? Anyway."_

Her mother laughed. Tears leaked from the corners of her eyes.

"If Tasuki and I have kids I'll let them know all about their grandparents. I don't know how I'll ever tell you about them, but maybe I'll learn to project inter-dimensional images and pop over in your dreams." She shrugged. "I just wanted to say that I love you and Daddy both, and that I'm sorry I have to go. But I'll always think of you, and if I ever have a daughter, she'll definitely be a social charmer." Swiping at her eyes Lolita mumbled, "Thank you, mom...dad."

And that was the last she saw of her little girl. She hit the replay button, climbed into her daughter's bed, and hugged her daughter's pillow. That video would be watched over and over and over.

**~The Epilogue of An Epilogue~**

"Lolita-chan, na no da!" Chichiri's cheerful voice rang out. He appeared a moment later, weighed down with books, Ami following closely behind. "Wow, no da. What a mess."

Tasuki's study was indeed a sight to see. A maid mopped up murky water that spilled all over the table while Lolita held a piece of soaked paper by the edges, trying to get it as dry as she could. "Rika-chan had a little accident with her art project," she replied with a shake of the head and a grin. At the sound of her name the little girl on the floor looked up from paging through her mother's old sketchbook.

"Ola, Uncle Chichiri! Ola Auntie Ami!" she cried out. "Mommy said that's Spanish for 'hello'."

"And so it is," Ami replied. "What have you been up to?"

"Paintin' Daddy a portrait. Rika-chan's been studyin' paintin' like Pic-a-sooo," the little redhead replied, bouncing a little. "So what'cha do today, Auntie Ami?"

"Minister Li taught me how to be diplomatic."

"Are you goin' to be the pres'd'nt someday, Auntie Ami?"

Lolita laughed. "There are no presidents in Konan, Baby. Auntie Ami's going to be an ambassador someday, not a president."

Rika stared at her with huge eyes, apparently tried to understand, failed, uttered a small "Oh," and went back to flipping through the sketchbook. As she found the charcoal picture she was looking for, Rika fell silent. She reached out to touch the faces when Lolita caught her chubby hand.

"Whoops! Granpapa and Grandmama's picture is for looking at only."

A frown creased Rika-s forehead. "Demo...Rika-chan can touch Granny an' Grampsy an' even ask for hugs. How's come I can only lookit Granpapa an' Granmama?" she asked in a childish lisp.

"That's because Granny and Grampsy are here. Granpapa and Grandmama are back in mommy's world." Lolita smiled as Rika leaned backwards, arms folded in mimicry of her father's appraising gesture.

"How's come we can't go visit?"

"Because they're too far away."

"Farther'n even your planes an' cars'n hel-cop-ters, mommy?"

"Much, much farther, Sweetie."

Their conversation was interrupted by a knock, followed by Tasuki walking into the room. He raised an amused eyebrow at the mess the maid was still mopping up, and the dripping painting in Lolita's hand, but only went to kiss his wife before plopping down on the floor beside his daughter. Rika at once relocated herself to her father's lap and snuggled deep.

"Daddy, I was wondering about somethin'..."

"What is it?"

"How's come you got to go to mommy's world? Mommy said it's farther than any a' her cars'r planes'r hel-cop-ters can reach. How's come, daddy?"

Tasuki shot Lolita a questioning look over his daughter's pale red head. She nodded at the portrait of her parents on the floor. Oh, that again. "Daddy got there by magic, Rika-chan."

"Can you take Rika-chan next time?"

"I'm afraid I won't be going back."

"Forever?"

"I...I guess."

She child straightened up, pondering for a moment before asking, "Mommy can't ever go back, too?"

"Never."

Her lower lip stuck out in a pout. "But won't Granpapa an' Granmama miss Mommy?"

"We miss each other every day, Honey," Lolita whispered, leaning down to kiss her daughter.

"So how's come they let you go?"

She and Tasuki smiled at each other. Tasuki reached out to brush her cheek and she leaned in to the touch. "They let me go so that Rika-chan will have a Daddy to see every day."

**~Finis~**

**A/N: Whew! It's done! It's done! XD I can't believe it. Thank you, thank you so much to everybody who's read and supported this fic. I don't know how I could have gotten through without all those favourites and alerts and hits and reviews! Especially the reviews. Thank you sooo much. I appreciate each and every one of them. **

**I think everything's been cleared up already? I hope so. But if anyone's got a question, please don't hesitate to put it in the reviews. Or PM me. Whichever is more convenient. I'll reply as soon as I can. Oh, and if you're sending in a question as not a registered user, please leave me with some way of contacting you. **

**Thank you from the tippy toppest overflow of my writer's ego. Thank you. I hope "Lessons Only Tasuki Can Teach" has not disappointed. :D**


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